Waiting For Now
by waitingfornow
Summary: The sequel to my story 'Mad Season'. Please read that first before reading this or it won't make sense.
1. Chapter 1

_Okay! I figured that there was no real way I could post __Mad Season__ without posting it's sequel, __Waiting For Now__. So here it is! This story has been a little tricky for me to write given how I start it out. Mad Season was entirely from Houston's point of view and after a long talk with my best friend, who was the first to read this, she helped me decide to try my hand at Edward's point of view. His is going to be slightly OOC because, quite honestly, no one can capture him the way Stephenie Meyer can. After all, he's her creation. So! With all this out of the way, I give you __Waiting For Now__. Enjoy and please, __**please**__ don't be shy in reviewing! I crave feedback and honestly, it really helps me keep writing. Be sure to read __Mad Season__ first though or you will be completely lost!_

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters._

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**Edward**

**Chapter One:**

Every great love story has a beginning, a euphoric middle, then a tragic end. Nevermind how quick that end comes, it always appears at the most impossible of times. There are unfortunate souls who never see that end coming. They become completely blindsided by the tragic twist and are later left broken and wondering how to put the pieces of their life back together. For me? I guess one could say that I was lucky. I knew the end was coming before I ever let myself enter into the beginning. But that doesn't make the pain any less real, it didn't prepare me in the slightest for what I was going to have to face.

For about ninety years, I'd been alone. The odd man out among three sets of perfectly matched lovers. Lovers that consisted of my family. There was my mother and father, in all of the ways that truly counted to me; Carlisle and Esme. Carlisle was the head of our family and had expanded it to envelope my eventual brothers and sisters in the compassion that always shined with his love. Rosalie and Emmett were the most obvious lovers in our family, their entanglement physical and on display for the entire world to see. Then there was Alice and Jasper, the only two members of my immortal family that had not been created by Carlisle. Alice had forseen her life with Jasper, as well as our family, and joined us without a second's hesitation. We were vampires to the very core, but we were very different from our eternal peers. We didn't feed on humans to sustain ourselves and withhold our immense strength. It had been Carlisle that placed the inside joke on our way of life. We were vegetarians; feeding only on animals so that we could co-exist with unsuspecting humans. And as I'd reached the hundred and eighth year of my life, it had been a human that changed everything I knew and thought of my life.

When Houston Morgan first walked into my Senior Physics class, she had been a demon. My own personal demon sent straight from the fiery pits of hell to tempt me into destroying the lives of myself and my family. She'd had no idea, as she sat down beside me in that first, fateful class; how I ached for her blood. She'd had no knowledge of the venom pooling in my mouth, the internal dialog created between my sensible voice and the voice of my monster. She hadn't even really noticed or knew that my muscles reacted of their own accord, coiling to spring and drain her from the life that sustained her. Even though I had left that classroom with her cast as the demon in my own personal story, she didn't stay in that role for very long. She had sparked a change that no other human or vampire had been able to. Alice had been the first one to see me fall in love with this mortal girl. A human girl with blood more intoxicating and potent to my dangerous nature than any other before her.

Houston Morgan had, had her own dark secret when she first walked into my endless life. We were alike in so many ways that initially, it had intriqued me. There was also the curious aggitation I felt when I realized that I couldn't read her thoughts. That was something that had never snared me before. Everyone, in both forms of life, were like an open book to my immortal gift. Alice could see a person's future as it shaped to their choices and decisions. I could see the thoughts and worries as they crossed a person's mind. Everyone but Houston. I'd met her shortly after the beginning of my Senior year at Forks High School, and it was in the summer after that year, just three months shy of her eighteenth birthday, that she became my wife. My perfectly matched lover. I was no longer the odd man out in my family. I'd found that eternal bond with an orphaned girl that had lost her mother to cancer, and never knew her father. But time was now against me, taking the place of endless days stretched out before me in a monotonous string created by the human facade I'd so perfectly cultivated. All thanks to Carlisle, my immortal and patient father.

Now she was Houston Cullen and the cancer that had taken her mother's life was taking her own life. A choice had been presented to me when I was finally let in on her damaging secret. I could stand by and watch her weaken and eventually die. With her death, our love would also die. I would never again get to see her cheeks warm with blood, I would never again get to hear the infectious harmony of her laughter. The thing that had cut me the most was I would never again get to feel her warm body gently resting against my hard and cold frame. If I kept with that original course, I would have to stand by and watch as her foster mother, Margie Banks, buried her. It was something that I couldn't stand. Her hold on my unbeating heart was that powerful.

There had been a second option granted to us. Houston hadn't been frightened or scared when she learned of the monster that rivaled me on an hourly basis. She had already believed in the fantasy of my kind, conjured by a human writer named Anne Rice. She had even dreamed of a life similiar to the one I lived. Houston's daydreams had always consisted of a vampire sweeping in to save her from her untimely death. And that was exactly what had happened. Even though I sometimes detested the way I lived, loathed the firey burn forever coating my throat in thirst, and missed the gaping hole I thought should house my soul; I'd come to the decision to offer her my way of life. The most selfish thing I could have ever asked of this human girl. She accepted readily to my course of action. She had agreed to become my wife in a trite, human ceremony that Emmett and Rosalie partook in every few years. Her final days as a human would be spent as Mrs. Edward Cullen before I stepped in and made her my immortal lover.

I had always hoped for more time. I hoped that she would be able to see her eighteenth birthday and join us in celebrating this milestone in her life. It had been sheer luck that she was granted a graduation from high school. Even though she had physcially been unable to partake in the actual ritual of walking across the stage to recieve her diploma; the achievement was still hers. The diploma had been framed by Esme and later hung in the bedroom that had transitioned from mine, to ours; right next to the latest diploma to be embossed with the name _Edward Anthony Masen Cullen_. My full name. My human and immortal name combined into one title.

We were back in our bedroom now, only it looked vastly different than it had the night before she became Mrs. Cullen. I'd never given much thought to putting an actual bed in my room. After all, I was a vampire and my kind had no need for slumber. There was a bed in Alice and Jasper's room, but that had been their choice. When we moved to the rainy, small town of Forks, Washington; I'd selected a large, wide leather couch to act as my unneeded relaxation.

It was still there in the room, along with the wall of shelves that housed my music collection. My beloved stereo had been pushed underneath it, cramping the space beside my bedroom door to make room for the hospital bed that Carlisle had secured for Houston. The couch wasn't comfortable or secure enough to cushion her skeletal body any longer. She had impacted my room even more now, leaving a clear picture that her clothes, books, and CDs mixed with mine hadn't created.

I sat on the long couch and watched as she slept, the monitor hooked to her heart beeping quietly to give me that peace of mind that she was still alive. Her body was still working and pulsing blood through her veins. But we were running out of time. It had been in her hometown of Houston, Texas; a place she had asked to visit before the end of her human life, where things took a dangerous turn for her.

The infection had come out of nowhere and no amount of drugs or antibiotics were loosening its hold. Her kidneys were no longer functioning, her liver and intestines so eat up with tumors that their function had ceased as well. The infection was crippling her in the ways she'd never known before. My wife had been strong enough to go through her daily life in a body that was riddled with cancerous tumors spilling poison into her perfect frame.

Houston was still the same woman to me, even after the final wall of her defenses had crumbled down in Texas. It had been sheer luck that I was able to catch her before she fell while trying to take a shower. I'd dutifully dressed and laid her down to rest, not really paying attention to her nakedness as I waited anxiously for her to regain consciousness. But the fever had begun to ravage her before I could see her eyes open. The sweat that coated her body was relentless and eventually, I just left her naked on the bed in our hotel room. The airconditioner had been turned on to it's full force, but I kept a blanket around her just in case. I wasn't quite sure of how to break her fever, but when she awoke to the fiery pain raging within her, she had begged for relief that my artic body temperature could only bring. Our first intimate act as husband and wife wasn't what had been written in countless romance novels, or acted out in various stage and film productions. While I had let myself get carried away long enough to appreciate the way she looked and marvel at how it felt to hold her against my own naked body, it had gone no further. I couldn't make love to my wife with the odds so stacked against us. Even if cancer wasn't eating away at her insides and strength, it would've still been virtually impossible with my ability to crush her if I wasn't careful. I had never been able to 'live in the moment', as Houston had always wanted for us.

Movement rang in my ears dimly and I turned my head instinctively to await the arrival of Alice. She had been keeping vigil over Houston almost as religously as I had been since bringing her back to Forks. I could hear it in her thoughts that she planned to relieve me so that I could go hunt. My eyes, which I had seen reflected in the feverish gaze of my true love during a moment of hazy alertness, were black. Houston always feared that color in my eyes, knowing as well as I did that my desire for her blood would become even more unbareable. Now didn't seem to be the case though, I welcomed the floral scent that wafted off her. It was my way of knowing that she was still with me, even as she slept. And I no longer had the overwhelming desire to feed from her, as I once had during the early part of our relationship. I'd been cured of that when I learned of her secret.

"Edward." Alice was quicker than I often gave her credit for. She was at my side sooner than I had anticipated, laying a deceptively dainty hand on my shoulder as she gazed at Houston's still form. "You need to feed. You have to if you're to give her what she wants."

"I know." I sighed heavily and paused long enough to kiss my sister's hand before I was on my feet and across the room in my blindingly fast speed. I forced myself to be careful as I picked up Houston's frail hand. I was already beginning to miss the warmth of her skin, knowing that the iciness was a direct result of her dying. "Love," I whispered and moved my other hand to gently push stray hair off her sweaty forehead. A loud sigh hitched and broke within her chest as she opened her eyes and stared up at me weakly. We were still unable to break her fever and bring her at least a little comfort. I could feel the pathetic hints of a smile on my lips as I leaned forward and kissed her clammy cheek. "I have to go hunt, but Alice is going to stay with you."

"Okay." She sighed with a small incline of her head. She could barely move without screaming in agony, so now she spent her days drifting in and out of consciousness constantly hooked to an IV tube that pushed morphine through her system. It was all we could do now, Carlisle had explained. She was fading so fast that it would have broken my heart if it still beat in my chest. "I'll be here."

"You better." I grinned down at her and breathed a silent sigh of relief when I found the familiar sparkle in her green eyes. Eyes that I had once seen through Carlisle's memories. Her eyes now looked as mine had when I lay on my death bed in 1918. Forcing myself not to think or dwell on what little memories I had of my human death, I kissed her lips lightly then bent over her immobile body to kiss the engagement and wedding bands that now looked too big for her slender fingers. I would have to have them resized. Maybe it was something I could do while we waited for her transformation to be complete. Providing I would be able to force myself from the house as she writhed in even more agony. "I love you." I whispered into her hand, smiling briefly when she tightened her grip against my fingers, then strode out of the room as fast as my legs could carry me. I had to be strong, I couldn't let my resolve waver. Houston needed me now more than she ever had before and I was determined not to let her down. I couldn't lose her, I _refused_ to.


	2. Chapter 2

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

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**Chapter Two:**

It was a rare and glorious day in the town of Forks, Washington. The sun was out and shining brilliantly against the chilling air beginning to creep in from Canada. Summer was gone, having faded into the calendar days of September. While I was grateful for the change in weather, it was also bittersweet. I no longer had to fear the weather and the effects the sun had on my skin. But now Houston was the one rarely able to go outside and enjoy the fleeting days of summer.

There was one downfall to keeping Houston as healthy as possible. I simply could not deny her anything. It was completely impossible, and we both seemed to know that. Just one look, however fleeting or quick, into those endless green eyes and I became her slave all over again. No matter what she said, no matter how many times she expressed me having too much power over her, that sometimes-disasterous gift went both ways.

It was because of that power that I sat behind her as she enjoyed the rare day of sunshine. Her fragile body was swaddled in at least three blankets, the legs of her pajama pants barely peeking out beneath the multi-colored fabric. Wool socks that had once been bought for me to keep up appearances during a camping trip made her feet look exceptionally tiny, but she was warm. Houston was protected from the slight chill of the wind and the icy temperature that constantly emanated from my body.

"I love how peaceful it is out here." She sighed, but couldn't fully downplay the hitch that shrouded her breathing now. I was paying even more attention to her now and nothing passed my notice. It wasn't fair to her, I was fully aware of that. But really, how could you keep from centering yourself around the person you loved most in the world? Especially when that person was fading before your very eyes.

"Are you warm enough?" I blurted out before I could really stop myself, chafing her covered arms with my cold hands in a vain attempt to rejuvenate her body heat. I was also becoming paranoid in this new phase of my life, it seemed. "Because we're going inside the second I feel you shiver."

"I'm fine." She promised and tilted her head against my chest so that I could look into the eyes I loved most in the world. It was in times like this when I wished, with all my might, that she saw herself the way I saw her. The way I'd always seen her. I'd never met anyone that had as expressive eyes as she did and it was something I was grateful for. Even though I couldn't see into her mind like I could with everyone else that crossed my path, but I had taught myself to look into her eyes to obtain the knowledge I couldn't pull from her thoughts. "I promised I would tell you when I start to get cold. Even though I won't like it, I know better than to try and derail you."

"I'm sorry." I sighed and bent my face into her hair. The scent emanating from her soft, dark locks was one of the most vital scents in my world. For as long as I'd known this beautiful woman, her hair always smelled the same. It was almost as potent to me as her blood had first been; strawberries and cream. "I'm not being fair to you, Houston. I swore that I wouldn't become overbaring and neurotic but yet...here I am."

"No you aren't." Her voice took on the stubbornness that I very rarely heard. While Houston wasn't weak by any means, she very rarely was granted the opportunity or need to assert herself. I caved to her desires with very little hesitation. Whatever she wanted, while it was in my power to give, she recieved. There was so much that I wanted to give her, that I craved lavishing her with. But her stubbornness prevented me from being able to do that. I had no idea how I was granted such a gift, to be able to have this woman in my life that only wanted me to love her and let her love me in return. She shifted ever so slightly against me again, and I leaned back enough to fully take in her new position. She was seated sideways between my knees now, the expression on her face absolutely heart-breaking. "You're not being overbaring or neurotic, you never have been, Edward. You're just trying to protect me and I love that about you. I know that you're right, even though there is a part of me that wants to try and test your resolve. I can't, not yet. I just have to be patient a little while longer then you'll get to find new ways to protect me."

The grin on her face was stunning. The way a simple curve of her lips lit up her entire face felt enough to revive my dead heart and send it racing in my chest. "You won't need my protection after you change, love." I smiled at her with my words, carefully molding my hand against her hollowed cheek as I leaned forward and brushed my lips across her warm forehead. The warmth of her skin relieved me in the best of ways, but I still couldn't forget how it felt to hold her icy hand in mine. The infection was still raging within her weakening body, but Carlisle had been able to grant her a little more time. Pretty soon, we would not be able to put off her transformation. That thought alone caused a deep sigh to build in my chest and escape slowly through my parted lips. "Houston, we're going to need to talk about your transformation. Time is running out for us, my love. But this all is going on your schedule. It happens when you're absolutely ready to join me in this life. It's not a light decision, even though I'm sure it's probably the lightest one you've been faced with yet. But I need to know if you want to celebrate your birthday with your heart still beating."

"You're right, it's one of the easiest decisions I'll ever make." She looked away from me as she spoke, fixing her green eyes on some far away spot in the yard. "Only second to agreeing to marry you." Houston's eyes returned to my face as she smiled again and this time, the grin reached all the way up into her eyes and made the golden flecks buried deep in the sea of green shimmer ever so slightly. The sparkle that had initially drew me in like a moth to a flame. But as quickly as the glimmer appeared, it faded and clouded over as she sighed and looked away again. "I know you want to wait, Edward. So we'll wait. I'm not going to ask too much of you. I absolutely refuse to."

"Houston." I sighed, gritting my teeth almost automatically at her selflessness. She was the one dying and concerned more about my part in this than her own. Of course, I shouldn't have been surprised by her take on this situation. Her compassion and willingness to accomodate others knew no bounds, something I'd first caught a glimpse of when we had just been lab partners in school. "This isn't about me, love." I sighed again and forced my jaw to unclench. Her eyes would catch the strain in my facial expression, I was absolutely sure of it. She was just as astute about me as I was of her. "If I didn't think..." My voice surprisingly cut out on me and a low hiss filled my throat as a result. I hated it when I couldn't quite forumlate words the way I wanted. So I tried again, forcing myself to just speak before she had the chance to worry about my sudden silence. "If I thought there was any chance of me killing you, I wouldn't do it. I'll never knowingly put you in harm's way, it would kill me to lose you."

"But," She began, then broke off suddenly and looked away. There was a light rush of blood underneath her translucent skin and I could tell she was having the same trouble I was with words. Nothing was coming out quite the way either of us wanted. Houston was still looking away when she spoke, her voice so quiet and strained that no human ears could have picked it up. This was the one time I was extremely grateful for my immortal senses. "You've tasted my blood once, Edward. Doesn't that...I mean, wouldn't it make the temptation even greater? You know what's going to happen."

The sigh that left my body was long and almost luxuriating, even though my lungs no longer required the inflation and deflation. "Houston," I breathed and lightly pressed my lips to the curve of her throat, ignoring the perfect curve my teeth had left there months before. Almost as if I was trying to figure out another way to soothe her, I kept my lips against her skin as I spoke quickly. Probably _too_ quickly for her to be able to keep up, so I worked to regain control over the speed of my words. "Yes, I have tasted your blood before, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to lose control and kill you. Too much has happened between that time and now. Or whenever your transformation happens. Plans have been put into place and you're in absolutely no danger of me losing control. I don't even have to bite you if that's what you're worrying about."

"What?" The squeak that intermingled with her voice was almost amusing, if it wasn't for our current topic of conversation. A shiver ripped through her back, causing her spine to vibrate against my chest. I resisted the urge to pull her into my arms and rush her inside, instead focusing on her reaction. "You...you don't have to bite me to change me?"

"No." I replied simply with a small shake of my head. Kissing her temple, I let one hand run through her silky hair then carefully lifted her into my arms before I stood and carried her inside. Surprisingly, there was no fight as I rushed through the first two stories and crossed the treshold of our room in mere minutes. Instead of going straight for the hospital bed that was still set up in the room, in case she worsened again; I sat down on the couch and kept her curled in my lap. "Carlisle and I were trying to figure out ways that we could make the transition easier for you. It will be a major benefit if your heart is barely pumping blood, the weaker you are, the less of a struggle there is. Or at least, that's what Carlisle thinks." I shrugged nonchalantly as I stared into her horrorstruck green eyes. I knew I was probably being too blase about her changing, but I had to be. It was the only way I could keep my mind clear and explain to her the different theories that my father and I had come up with. "I can always inject the majority of the venom into your bloodstream, create shallow bites on a few key parts of your body, then let the rest happen naturally. Or..." I hated trailing off, second time today and I was already beginning to become annoyed with myself. "If you don't want to wait for your body to weaken, I'll drain you enough so that it's as if you were injected, instead of bitten."

"I want you to do whatever you feel comfortable doing." She breathed, her lips moving lightly across the hard expansion of my throat. Her neverending selflessness was constantly amazing me. This was supposed to be all about her, about how she wanted her heart to stop beating. But yet, she sat in my lap dissecting all of the ways that this would be difficult for _me._ If it were possible, I felt my silent heart swell even more with my eternal love for her. How had I gotten so lucky that this beautiful, human girl had fallen in love with a monster like me? And better still, agreed to join me in an eternally damned existance. I couldn't help but wonder if this was the decision she would have made if she were as healthy and vibrant as our former classmates had been. Would she still want to be with me for the rest of her life, if it stretched for years upon years, instead of mere months?

"I already told you," I sighed again and bowed my head over her hair, my fingers carefully sliding up and down the length of her spine. Even sick, she was still as warm and soft as she'd always been when I was lucky enough to be able to hold her in my arms. The scent of her blood was still extremely potent to me, but I barely felt the firey burn coating my throat now. The monster inside me only roared dully now and then when her scent would hit me unexpectedly. Perhaps he was aware of Houston's limited amount of time and knew that, all too soon, the temptation of her blood would cease to exist. That was something I was extremely grateful for, often finding myself unable to wait for the time when she would be completely unbreakable. That was the moment when I would be able to love her the way I'd always wanted to. "This is happening how _you_ want, no one else. No one else has to deal with what you're about to face." My voice dropped slightly as I spoke, my words soon becoming a breathless whisper as a new thought seized me. "You can change your mind, Houston. No one will be upset by your choice."

I didn't have to look at her face to know what she was thinking when her body suddenly went rigid against my arms. She'd always had the same reaction whenever I offered to let her out of the promise she'd made when she agreed to marry me. Everything so far felt like the best kind of dream, one I'd never let myself hope to obtain. I knew better than to try and push my luck. Even after a year with her, I still hadn't been able to shake the impression that I didn't deserve her. No matter what happened, no matter how she changed or molded with this new course of our life; I was always going to see myself as a monster. And she was always going to be the most perfect being I'd ever seen. Nothing, not the bright crimson that would soon fill her eyes before dulling into golden hues with animal blood, nor her skin paling to icy stone; would ever recreate my image of her. But there was still a part of me that vehemently wanted a different life for her. A choice that didn't make her the kind of monster I was. The kind of monster that I'd hoped she would never become. But things weren't fair in the slightest. She'd been dealt a devestating blow and no matter how deep my internal revlusion ran, I would give her this life if it was what she wanted. If it meant that I could have her with me for the rest of eternity, and it was the way she wanted our life together to be, I would rise above my own thoughts of this life and grant her that immortal wish. I just hoped that there would never come a day when she hated or resented me for this.

"It's what I want." She finally spoke, her voice soft and breaking around her words. "It's the only way we can be together and I'm sorry but I'm just not ready to give you up yet." She sighed at that then cringed involuntarily at some inner thought. A thought that I couldn't access, but desperately wanted to. I hated seeing her in pain, any variation or form, especially if the pain came from within her own mind.

My hollow chest felt even more cold as I caught the apology in her words. She was apologizing to me for being selfish. Did she even know how selfish I had been the night I proposed? Or that the selfishness ran even deeper as she walked down the isle toward me on our wedding day? I could still envision her in her wedding dress with perfect clarity. I could see the dainty straps covering her upper arms as she forced herself to move slowly down the isle on Esme and Jasper's arms. I wasn't even sure if she was aware of the fact that she shook throughout the entire ceremony. I still smiled whenever I looked down at my left hand and remembered her surprise when I withdrew the rings. Our outward signs of devotion that would later serve another purpose when she was ready to walk back out into the human world once again. After all, she was going to look no older than I was, and she had already been told of the life laid out before her. The life where she was forever a high school and later, a college student. There would be times when I couldn't stand beside her with whichever town we were in knowing that she wasn't my wife, but my adopted sister. That would be another thing we would have to talk about once her conversion had happened. Would she continue to carry the name Cullen or would she revert back to her mother's maiden name as she had in her human years before marrying me?


	3. Chapter 3

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

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**Chapter Three:**

The forest around me looked positively boring as I sat on a large boulder, overlooking a wide range of varying hues of green. Emmett wanted to go hunting and of course, I had been the one elected to accompany him. There was an ulterior motive for this, I was sure. But some reason, I couldn't sift out what that was entirely.

Alice had been unhelpful in this area as we prepared to leave. She had thankfully agreed to monitor Houston for me in case her health took a turn while I was away. But there was something going on and even Rosalie had averted my gaze when I looked to her for some kind of internal confirmation from her thoughts.

"Quit playing with your food!" I snapped playfully, not even needing to force my tone into lightness as I watched him wrestle with the large bear he'd come across by simple luck. Bears, grizzlies especially, were his favorite of the animal population and he always acted the same when hunting the daunting beasts. Time would never assauge him of the anger he felt when he remembered that first, fateful quarrel with a grizzly.

"Shut up!" He snapped happily, nothing ever rankled him to the point of anger. He paused long enough to grin brilliantly at me then cussed loudly when the bear noticed his preocupation and sliced at his chest. The shirt he'd worn out of the house was rags within seconds and another low curse flowed past his lips. _Rose is going to kill me and I'm sure Alice's gonna help! I keep ruining all the shirts they get me._

I chuckled aloud at his thoughts, even shaking my head slightly before a less-than-appealing scent wafted underneath my nose. My preference, a mountain lion was prowling around the area looking for his own dinner. My muscles coiled almost instantly and I was barely aware of Emmett's mental greeting as I took off after my own prey. Finding the lion was perhaps the easiest part of hunting, even with my mind filled with thoughts of Houston spending the day with Alice. I never left her alone at night anymore, it was something that I just could not allow. Her nightmares were growing more intense and she was to the point where she needed as much rest as possible. The simple things were starting to become difficult for her and it was actually painful to watch.

I easily vaulted onto the lion's back and pushed us both to the ground as a recent memory filled one part of my mind. The pain in Houston's legs had been particularly intense that morning and she'd been unable to stand up without help. I remembered Jasper entering my bedroom to fill her with his deceptive calm when the pain made her eyes tear up, moisture spilling over almost instantly when she collapsed back against the couch in gasps of pain. The memory twisted my insides and flooded my veins with anger, forcing me to puncture the animal's neck with more force than I'd initially intended. Maybe hunting hadn't been such a bad idea after all.

Once I was done, with no evidence of my kill; I drifted back over to the rock I'd been perched on before catching the lion's scent and found Emmett finishing up as well. His dark hair was clotted with leaves, dirt, and sap from where he and the bear had uprooted a small spruce. He grimaced at his shirt for a brief second then hopped up onto the boulder and settled himself beside me calmly. "How's Houston today?"

"Not good." I sighed and frowned in sheer reflex. It hurt to think about her wasting away, but in an odd way, I suddenly felt the need to talk about it. To hear my brother's take on the entire situation. How would he react if he were in my shoes? What if it were Rosalie, human and dying with cancer, instead of Houston? "The pain's so bad in her legs that she couldn't even get up this morning."

_Wow_. Emmett breathed mentally, becoming like a statue beside me as he interpreted my words. _I can't even begin to understand how you do it, Edward. It kills me to watch her and I don't have the same tie to her that you do. How can you be so strong about all of this?_

"I honestly don't know." I shrugged and turned my head to actually look at him. "I guess it's because I know there's a light at the end of that proverbial tunnel. Her fate's been decided, it just needs to be acted on now."

"But why wait?" Emmett surprised me by voicing this question aloud, instead of just thinking it. "Why make her suffer when she doesn't have to? That's the part I can't understand."

"It's what she wants. She wants to remain human as long as possible because she's afraid of what changing her will do to me. Even with all of this, with her body shutting down, she's more concerned with my place in it all than her own. She has no idea what's ahead of her, but yet she doesn't really seem to care."

"Do you think she's going to change her mind? Think she'll want to die and stay dead instead of become one of us?"

"I asked her about it." Another sigh filled the air after my words and I looked out, unseeing, into the giant mass of trees surrounding us. "She's adamant about her decision. She actually apologized yesterday for not being ready to give me up yet. She thinks that she's the selfish one in all of this."

_And of course, you still consider yourself the monster in her fairytale. You need to let yourself off the hook, bro. Maybe this life will be cakewalk compared to what she's already gone through._

"I sincerely hope so." I whispered with the feverish wish for that to be true. For someone as physical and simple as Emmett, I was constantly surprised at how deep his thoughts and emotions ran. I knew that he loved Rosalie fiercely, no one could ever deny that once they saw the true love underneath our human facades as adopted children to Carlisle and Esme Cullen. But Emmett rarely injected himself into the more harsher undertones of our lives. He was perfectly content with what we were, and that was one way Houston reminded me of my brother. They both had the same outlook on vampirism. It was better than death.

The rest of our time was spent in silence from there. A pack of elk soon caught our attention and we focused on them before returning home. I was anxious to get back to Houston, hating it every single time I had to be away from her. I was never sure if, when I left her, it would be for the last time. My new fear had become not being able to be there to save her like I'd promised.

_Thank you._ Emmett's thoughts snatched me away from my own as we ran back to the house.

"For what?" I asked calmly, easily keeping pace with him as we sprinted through close clumps of trees and deaden forest life.

_Coming out with me. I know it's hard to leave her, but I needed to ask my questions without her around._

We had reached the house just as his most important question yet finally came to the forefront of his mind. What would I do if I were too late to safe Houston?

"I'll find success in an area that thwarfed Carlisle." I answered automatically and abruptly walked into the house. I knew that my answer wasn't simple and he would stew on it for an unimaginable length of time. Emmett had one of the most brilliant minds I had ever looked into, but I knew that my choice of words sometimes brought him up short. Especially since I had chosen to bring a part of Carlisle's past into my answer. If I did fail Houston and bring her greatest nightmare to fruitation, I would find a way to cease my existance. The world would mean nothing without her there to share it with me. I saw no point in eternity, in the very core of my abilities, if it failed her.

I knew the change that would grip me if Houston no longer existed and didn't want to spread that into the lives of my family. I refused to fill Esme's eyes with sorrow at my suffering, knowing that she was agonizing like me. Houston's death would take it's toll on all of us, but my family would survive it. We would never be the same, but my heart would become even more silent if I were to lose my reason for existing.

Refusing to think about it, I just ran up to our room and threw the door open. A loud gasp filled my throat at what greeted me, but it wasn't the worst thing in the world I had ever seen. That still resided with the memory I carried of catching my wife's limp body in the shower.

Houston had been moved from the couch to the hospital bed and a tube was now protruding from the crook of her left elbow. Carlisle had been forced to go back to feeding her with fluids. She looked away from the window when I gasped and a soft, almost serene smile covered her features as her hand, which lay on her swollen abdomen, twitched as if she wanted to reach out for me, but couldn't. "Hi Handsome."

Pain pierced me like a knife as I closed the door behind me and slowly dragged my feet over to the small chair Carlisle had brought in when she had needed constant surpervision. "My heart." I sighed and leaned over to kiss her forehead, then both her cheeks, nose, and finally; her lips. The usual warmth that molded against my stone skin was just barely there and more jolts of unease coiled in the pit of my stomach. "What happened?"

"I fainted again." She sighed and the hand on her belly twitched again. She was trying to brush the change in her health off as some inconsequental thing. As if I shouldn't be worried that she needed the bed once again. "Carlisle says I'll be fine in a couple of days." She nodded and smiled up at me encouragingly. I caved to the briefest of agonizing smiles before I noticed the tube sticking out from underneath her blanket. Sliding one hand into the one that rested against her side, my eyebrows puckered as I lifted the blanket with my other hand and inspected the new tube. Panic replaced pain this time when a needle disappeared into the soft skin that covered her lower midsection. She sighed again and I pulled my eyes back to her face when I heard her hair rustle against the crisp linen underneath her head. She was looking at the window again, seeing something that her eyes could not make out. "I have too much fluid building up, Carlisle is scared that it'll cause a rupture or make my infection worse."

I could not believe Houston sounded so calm as she spoke of all this! She should've been rushed to the hospital immediately, her stomach was painfully distended from her body now, resembling nothing I'd seen since her kidneys had begun to fail. "I'll be back." I promised quickly and kissed her cool lips, then her naked left hand and launched out of the room. The sear that had appeared when I didn't see her rings flared aggressively as I ran downstairs in my search for Carlisle.

I found him in the living room, staring at the flat screen in boredom with Esme on his right, Alice and Jasper on the floor in front of them, and Rosalie curled in the chair next to the couch.

"Why isn't she at the hospital?" I whispered angrily, feeling every single muscle in my body tighten as I forced my voice below Houston's hearing range. I didn't want her to hear me so angry with my family. She wouldn't like it.

Carlisle looked unphased as he glanced away from the TV and stood to meet me in the entryway. "Because she didn't want to go. Edward, she's refused any kind of medical attention that I can't provide. While I don't feel good about treating her in this manner, I cannot go against her wishes."

"Think about it." Esme joined in as Alice stole from the room, her thoughts focused on Houston as she moved.

_I'll keep her company, get yourself under control._

I forced a deep breath into my lungs, no longer feeling the need to wince when Houston's lingering scent in the room filled the breath. Letting it out slowly, I turned my agonized stare onto Esme when she grasped my hand and pulled it toward her chest. "We can do more for her here, where there are less eyes to watch her. Do you really want her in the hospital when it comes time for her transformation? Carlisle won't be able to steal her from the morgue with her heart still beating as he was with you and me. Trust him, sweetheart. None of us are taking her condition lightly."

Rosalie snorted suddenly and I finally looked over at her for the first time since storming into the room. Of course, she was pissed that we were talking about Houston, instead of her. _I don't see why you don't just change her already. Her life's over, there's nothing else she can do. You're being selfish by condemning her to that hospital bed._

My only response was the low snarl that filled my chest. I glanced at my parents one more time as my lips set into an angry line. I wasn't entirely sure who I was mad at as I sprinted out of the house, and as far away from my family's intruding thoughts. I blended in with the trees for the second time that day, anxiously awaiting the familiar calm that always enveloped me when I ran. It was effortless, requiring no thought, like breathing. But as I continued to run, I didn't find the satisfaction I once knew. There was no pleasure in running because it was taking me away from Houston. My dying wife that I had the ability to save. My course changed unexpectedly and I was soon running the exact way I'd come. For all of her resentment and bitternes, Rosalie had a point. In almost every single sense of the word, Houston's human life was over.

It was finally time to address that and not let the subject shift onto anything else. A decision was going to be made.


	4. Chapter 4

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Four:**

When I walked back into the house, I was not surprised to find my entire family waiting there, minus Alice. She was still with Houston and had undoubtedly seen my change of heart. If it could even be called that. But just by the expressions on Esme and Carlisle's faces, I knew that she had told them what I'd decided.

As much as I wanted to rush to Houston's side, I walked into the house and headed straight for the living room. My family was waiting for me, their eyes displaying varying ranges of the same emotion; concern. They were worried about what I planned to do. When I looked at Jasper, I felt the curious tugging of calm threatening to assault my emotions. But I pushed it away, simply shaking my head at him as I walked further into the room. My human facade carried me to the couch and I dropped soundlessly onto the couch beside Esme. She wrapped her arms around me silently, but I could hear her thoughts as clearly as if she spoke them aloud. _You've decided to change her, haven't you?_

"I have." I sighed, but couldn't quite lift my head to meet any of their gazes. It was almost as if there was some invisible weight crushing against me. Pushing me to my most extreme of limits. Promising to take her life from her was one thing, but actually _putting_ that plan into action was something else entirely. "I'll need to talk to her about it first, but Rose is right." I spoke her name with a sigh and looked up to gauge her reaction.

"I may not have liked her at first," She started, her hardened expression softening ever so slightly as Emmett put his arm around her shoulders. "But I don't want to see her suffer anymore. Or you. She's part of our family, Edward. It's time to make good on your other promise. It's not healthy for any of us to continue watching her waste away."

My sister, for all her vanities and shallowness, was speaking from nothing but genuine concern. Even though I couldn't see Rosalie and Houston the best of friends any time soon, I did realize that she had finally accepted Houston as her sister. Just as Alice had so many months before. That had happened when she saw a possibility for Houston's future that only I could provide.

I didn't let myself think about that vision very often, even after I proposed immortality to the fragile girl lying upstairs. It had stung to see Houston as cold and frozen as Alice, their arms wrapped tightly around one another. But she had looked healthy and so _strong _in this vision that my resolve to keep her human had wavered. I would never completely agree with the damnation I was about to inflict on this powerless woman, my wife, but it would keep her from dying. That was what she wanted, after all.

"It's time." Carlisle spoke so quietly that I almost didn't hear him, as wrapped up in my own thoughts as I was. My eyes flickered to meet his and he went on as he held my gaze steadily. "Edward, she doesn't have much time left. All I can do for her now is keep her comfortable. Any one of my colleages can diagnose her as I have. Her liver has completely shut down and her kidneys are weakening faster under the strain of a lost organ. Pretty soon, it's going to put severe strain on her heart. Once that happens, there truly will be nothing we can do for her. Our venom cannot work miracles, though I wish it could for her."

Every single one of his words felt like a knife through my dead heart. Houston was dying. Her body was giving up the fight and she was even more powerless to stop it now. Well, at least that explained her sudden inability to walk around. Just as she had predicted. This was what she had never wanted me to see. I'd never wanted her to see the monster that swam in my eyes, and she never wanted me to see her weaken with impending death. "I need to go talk to her." My throat constricted around the words, just as my lips twisted in agony. I rose silently to my feet, completely ignoring the thoughts of my frozen family as I climbed the stairs toward the center of my universe.

Her heartbeat was slow and only slightly steady as I ghosted into the room and appeared in the chair beside her bed within mere seconds. Her eyes were closed, but her expression had not completely relaxed in slumber. Houston could still feel the pain raging throughout her tiny frame, even in unconsciousness. That just made my choice even more clear. How could I make her suffer any longer?

"Houston." I whispered and reached out to gently run my fingers over her protruding cheekbone. She looked even more wasted away now than she had on the day of our wedding. Again, another worst fear was coming true for my beautiful soulmate. She didn't automatically respond to my touch as she had in her healthier days. My fingers slid to her jawline then abruptly to the scar that was hidden underneath her limp hair. She hadn't even been able to take a shower by herself since our illfated trip to Texas.

My throat constricted again and my lungs twisted up against my ribs as I took in every single change to her features. Her hair had now reached her waist and I knew that was something she would be grateful for once she was changed. My lovely wife would have a beautiful head of hair for the rest of eternity. She would never again have to worry about losing her hair when harsh, foreign chemicals assaulted the cancer killing her insides. I leaned forward and kissed the permanant impression of my teeth then brushed my lips against hers. They were colder than they had been earlier in the day and I was instantly worried all over again. The fever that sometimes spiked beyond control had even lost it's power to affect her body temperature. She was never going to be warm again.

Her eyes fluttered open then and a sharp gasp of pain slid past her lips when she bodily turned toward me. "It hurts." She sighed heavily, her voice still thick with sleep despite her unmanagable discomfort. "Make it stop."

"It won't hurt very much longer, love." I promised quietly, yet feverishly as the tips of my fingers continued to glide over her cooling skin. Her heart still beat slowly against her chest, her blood sliding agonizingly slow throughout her veins as it struggled to keep moving throughout her body. We hadn't been doing her any good at all. I'd only helped my family prolong her agony, intensifying it as her internal organs shut down. "But I need to warn you about what's in store. The pain is going to get much, much worse."

She sighed at that and there was the slightest tightening in her forehead. "The fire." Her words were still quiet, but hoarse as her breathing hitched.

"Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?"

She stared into my eyes again at my question and a tiny flash of anger flickered in her eyes. Eyes that would soon glow crimson with her change. "I love you. I want to...love you."

I could see the stress she was putting on herself, speaking in sentences that consisted of more than two words. She was so determined to remind me of her love that it was causing her physical pain. But still, I couldn't bring myself to take that first step. To set the whole plan into action. The room for her transformation had already been set up by Carlisle. She would be moved in there while my venom coursed through her veins, killing her body and the cancer. Once it was all complete, she would be brought back in here, into the bed I had already ordered to replace the one she currently lay in. She would awake to her new life in our room. A room that would describe her just as much as it described me. It felt like such a small gift compared to what she was giving me, but it was all that I could do until Esme's gift was ready. The gift she had been painstakingly working on so that it would be ready in time for Houston's eighteenth birthday. The birthday she would not see with her human eyes.

"I'm ready." Her eyes held me immobile again as she spoke, her voice strengthening as if it realized she needed her own little power of persuasion. She didn't need it. I was still very much putty in her hands. "I'm ready to stop...my heart. To give up this fight."

And she was. The conviction in her eyes was staggering. I couldn't help but smile sadly at her limitless determination. Her bravery would never cease to astound me. "Okay." I answered simply then stood and fully leaned over her. She relaxed back against the bed underneath me and laid one hand on my side. Her touch was even softer than before, another sign of her deterioration. "Sleep now, my beautiful wife." I whispered, grinning when her expression softened and a small smile contorted her lips. My breath was flowing freely against her cheeks, lips, and nose. I suddenly wished feverishly that I could glimpse into her mind for the thoughts that made her smile. "Spend one more night dreaming for the both of us. Everything will be ready when you wake up."

I would be ready when she awoke again to give her that final proof of my love. And selfishness, the monster in me added relentlessly.

Her eyes remained closed and her breathing evened out as sleep took her away from me yet again. Possibly for the last time. I sat back down in the chair and shifted restlessly, even though there was no discomfort guiding my bodily actions. It was merely from pretending to be human for so long. Even after I met the one person, the woman that had given me at least part of my soul back, that I didn't need to perform for any longer.

As I sat, staying at her side instead of going downstairs to help my family prepare, I watched her sleep. Just as I'd done when she still lived under Margie's roof, my eyes took in every single change and shift of her expression and body. She still winced in pain when she moved, but her features smoothed out to indicate that whatever she was dreaming about was a pleasant one. I'd hoped that her last night as my human wife would be an appealing one. I didn't want her dreaming about the fear of transformation. She knew what she was preparing herself for, the fire that would consume her then finally fade into a thirst that would never be quenched by human blood. As long as that was the course of action she chose. She was as averse to taking human life as I was, and I couldn't help but wonder how she would fair in her first years as a newborn vampire. Would it be easy for her to obstain from human blood? Would the scent of it snarl her senses and make her an out-of-control monster? The kind of monster that had never been implanted in her mind.

Houston knew each of our stories, down to the goriest of details. The first year was going to be the toughest for her and I'd grudgingly revealed that she probably would not feel like herself for at least a few years. Her main personality trait, as she'd put it, was thirsty. Everything else, including our love for one another, that burning passion that had yet to be physically expressed, would take a backseat to the aching burn that would coat her throat. Houston had never once let her fear or uncertainty show. She wasn't scared of this new phase of her life, of the monster I was about to unleash into her tiny body. The monster that would make her so much stronger than she was now, stronger than her entire family. But she was finally getting her wish, a wish she'd never verbally announced to me. That was something I'd seen in one of Alice's visions, her yearning for a family that would love her as fiercely as she loved them. And the powers of her love were as limitless as her bravery and selflessness.

Houston had been a Cullen long before I put the ring on her finger, eternally linking our lives together in the last human ceremony she would ever partake in with her heart still beating. She was going to die a married woman, and hopefully awake with the ability to love me as passionately as I loved her.


	5. Chapter 5

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Five:**

It was almost as if I was welded to the couch. There wasn't a single part of my anatomy that I could force from the white fabric underneath me. Even with the clouds beginning to peek above the horizon, I stayed where I was. I couldn't force myself up off the couch to go move Houston from our room to the small library that had been temporarily converted for her.

"Edward." My head jerked up on its own accord when Carlisle's voice met my ears. It was unusual for him to need to verbally announce his presence. I could only assume that I'd been so consumed in my own thoughts that I had unintentionally blocked out others around me. But now that I'd noticed it, I couldn't escape from the thoughts filtering through my father's mind.

_Poor boy is probably worrying himself sick over Houston. Just as she's doing about him. She's actually made herself sicker by trying to protect him._

That thought alone was enough to make me flinch. Even though my body no longer needed the movements that pegged a human being, that didn't mean I couldn't always control involuntary movements. Being with Houston had softened me more than I could've ever realized. "Do you think everything will go okay?" I asked quietly, the words spilling past my lips before I could really stop them.

The smile on Carlisle's face was kind as he stared at me then reached out and lightly thumped my back. "She's going to be just fine, Edward. I won't let anything happen to her."

"But..." I frowned when my throat suddenly constricted and angled my head slightly away from Carlisle's patient stare. I hated feeling weak around any member of my family, but it always felt the worst around the head of our family. Perhaps it was because I owed him every single thing I had. After all, he was my creator. He was the one that had opened this life up to me instead of letting me waste away in Chicago so long ago. "What if I lose control?"

"You won't, my son." Another light thump resonated against my back and I stayed immobile as his thoughts began to speak for him. _You have so much more strength and willpower than I could ever hope to have. It's not going to be easy, I cannot lie to you about that. But you've resisted her this long, and you're so much closer to her now than when you first came to me about her. Do you remember that?_

Oh, how I remembered that disasterous first day! I'd spent the entire hour imagining ways to lure Houston from the room just so I could give in to the thirst she had ignited in my throat. I'd always prided myself on my restraint, but that first day, she had tested every single thing that consisted of my humanity. Even though I still wasn't completely convinced that I was still in posession of my soul, I knew that there was a major part of me that just could not take her life. No matter how badly I had ached to that first day. "She looked at me like I was some sort of monster. Which, I was and still am. But now...now she wants to be that same monster. I want to give her that, I honestly do, but there's just something that won't let me get up and act on the promises I've made her."

"It's completely natural, Edward. You're fighting with your conscious, even though you fully understand that this is the best option for Houston. Can you honestly sit here and tell me that you would rather bury her than change her?"

"I'd change her in a heartbeat." I announced with fierce conviction, my eyes blazing to strengthen my words as I stared at Carlisle. But there was another part of me, a smaller part of me afraid to fail. What if this was the one moment where my weakness reigned? What if I didn't have it in me to simply drain her enough to let the venom work faster through her body? I wanted to make this as easy and painless as possible for her, but what would it end up costing her? Was I dooming her to a death where she would never wake up just because I was being stubborn and doing things the way I knew she wanted me to?

"Then your decision has been made. So has hers. She's not afraid, Edward. I can see that in her eyes as clearly as I can see her love for you. You need to trust that now, son. You need to convince yourself that you are going to successfully change her. Otherwise you will set yourself up for the greatest loss of your immortal life."

Carlisle was right. Of course he was right! I sighed heavily and let my head fall into my hands. I could feel my hair brushing against the back of my cold fingers as I slid them through my hair. But before I could get up and take that nesessary first step, a loud knock suddenly sounded at the front door.

"Who on Earth...?" Carlisle muttered, already on his feet and halfway to the door when my body finally registered the sound. I stood, but stayed exactly where I was as I listened closely for my father's voice. Whoever was visiting us at this hour could not have a healthy, legtimate reason to be here. It was simply impossible. I wasn't afraid of our secret being betrayed. Carlisle could simply claim that he had just come home from his nightly shift at the hospital and the porch was so well covered that the rising sun wouldn't affect our skin. But the South wall made completely of glass was a completely different story. As quick as possible, I pushed the invisible keypad right inside the living room and set the large metal shutters to work. They ghosted shut without so much as a sound and I finally moved to see who our guest was.

Even though I didn't need the breath, air stuck in my throat when I noticed Margie's slight frame in the doorway. She was coming to check on Houston, it all made sense now. I checked my father's thoughts quickly, knowing that he was going to agree to whatever the woman asked. As if on silent cue, his gaze flickered to mine quickly then returned to Houston's last foster mother once I'd nodded and headed for the stairs. It was only right that Houston get to say goodbye to Margie. And it would possibly even work out to our benefit. Margie Banks would set the story into motion. She would be the one to return to Forks with news of Houston's mortal death. As the grieving husband, I would have to be the one to explain my wife's final wishes for no funeral or viewing. This would work out, it had to for the sake of the woman laying upstairs.

I crossed the threshold into the room quickly once I'd exited Margie's worried gaze. No matter how anxious I was, appearances were as vitally important as ever.

"Houston." I breathed and leaned over her, brushing my fingertips over her forehead. There was no trace of a fever against her skin, that I could feel at least. But with my body temperature, I wasn't sure if I was a very good judge of character.

She awoke slowly, her tired green eyes clouded with pain and fatigue. "Edward?"

"Good morning, sweetheart." I grinned down at her, knowing by the change of her facial expression that I had used the smile she loved most. It felt like a jolt straight to my dormant heart when I heard her pulse accelerate slightly then even out. "Margie is here to see you. Do you think you're up to telling her goodbye?"

"I have to." She sighed quietly, her voice barely above a whisper as I carefully extracted the IV from her arm and eased a Band-Aid over the tiny, puckered wound in her elbow. She would no longer need IVs or tubes, her time was dangerously short. "Are you taking me to her?"

"I am." I nodded and kissed her forehead then gently lifted her into my arms. No matter how careful I was, she still winced in pain when her frail body was lifted off the hospital bed she had been confined to the night before. She seemed to know all of this by heart because she grabbed the blanket always kept on the edge of her bed and smoothed it over her bare legs as easily as she could. Her tee shirt, which had come from my own closet, overpowered her tiny frame and the blanket covered her bare lower body. Nothing fit her anymore, we had long ago given up keeping her fully clothed.

"Just relax." I soothed, making my voice as calm and as quiet as I could as I slowly carried her downstairs. I couldn't travel at my normal speed with her as weak as she was, it would hurt her too much if, for one second, I let her protruding skeleton collide with my hard arms. Margie had moved into the living room by the time I came back downstairs with Houston. My smile was sad as I slowly manuevered my wife's tiny body past her and laid Houston gently on the couch. There was another wince in pain when her weight was shifted and I was quick to drop another kiss to her forehead.

She sighed heavily, mostly in pain, and resituated herself on the couch. The blanket now completely covered her legs and midsecton, but there was no way we could hide how pale and sallow her face had become. The circles under her eyes were almost as dark as the circles that ringed mine whenever I went too long without hunting. Her skin was stretched painfully over her cheekbones and jawline, but she still looked intoxicating when she smiled warmly up at Margie. "Hi! I've missed you."

"Oh. Houston." The words were supposed to be a complete sentence, I was sure of it. But as Margie flew to the couch and pulled Houston into her arms, they resonated as two separate sentences.

I'd never really taken the time to see just how much Margie had come to care for Houston. I had always just assumed that their relationship was one of convienence, to keep the peace in a household that was less than ideal because of the company Margie kept. I quickly scanned her thoughts for some sort of hint to her monsterous boyfriend's whereabouts. But there was nothing. Every single thought the woman had was trained on the dying woman in front of her.

"I'm sorry I didn't come sooner, honey. But I was trying to stay out of the way so you could get settled in here." She confessed quietly, sounding and feeling very much ashamed of her absence. Even though I was trying to give them the upmost amount of privacy, I still couldn't block Margie's parade of thoughts from having an impact on me. _She looks so tiny now! It must be killing Edward to see her like this._

In truth, it did hurt me immensely to see Houston as frail and weak as she was. She was living her worst fear, but as I silently stole from the room, I tried to comfort myself with the knowledge that she wouldn't suffer much longer. Three days, a week at the most was all she had left to feel her heart beat in her chest. A quiet sigh passed my lips as I slowly entered the dimly lit dining room. Just one of many rooms in this large house that was rarely used. But that didn't mean it was bare or empty by any means. Esme had gone above and beyond in this room, draping the walls in rich colors that contrasted perfectly with the large, circular dining table that was merely a prop. The plush chairs, which probably looked inviting to most humans, was the only furniture used. And that was only when we had to come together as a family to decide or talk about something. It had been at this very table, seated underneath the grand chandelier overhead that I told my family about the extreme temptation that initially drew me to Houston.

It felt strange to be in this room now, so many months after the day I raced home from school to announce my intent to leave. After all, I couldn't hear the thoughts that soon became clear in the eyes of the girl that would later become my wife. If any one in my family had told me that I would be standing here now, biding my time before I fulfilled Alice's most prominant vision to my existance, I would have either laughed in their face, or growled and destroyed the nearest object. But here I was, just one room away from the faintly beating heart that was the soundtrack to my entire life. A sound that I was so attuned to that it made me wonder if I would ever get used to no longer hearing it once Houston officially became a Cullen in every single way. Would she grow to hate me? Would she, years down the line, resent the monster behind our eyes as Rosalie did, or struggle with our lifestyle the way Jasper grappled with it every single day.

A faint noise resonated behind me, but I didn't have to look behind me to see who it was. A rush of serenity enveloped me at once, tugging the anguish and sorrow from my veins as my newest brother came to a stop beside me. "You're still struggling with the decision."

"I am." I nodded with a small sigh. It was impossible to keep my feelings a secret from Jasper. But it was easy, almost like breathing, to talk to him about it. He felt everything I felt, though not as magnified. He'd once felt the powerful pull that connected me to my true love, he'd felt my love for her before I'd even realized what the emotion had been. "I just hope she doesn't grow to resent me for this."

"She won't." He confirmed with a small incline of his head. Abruptly, I realized that he could feel everything Houston felt as well. He experienced the pain that gripped her daily, but I had to wonder if he could feel anything beyond the pain when he stood near her. "She loves you, Edward. More completely and more powerfully than anything else I've ever seen. She truly wants this life, she wants to stay with you. And she may not admit this, but she is terrified of not being saved. I try to block it out when I can, but the fear is always there inside her. I tried to talk to her about it once, but I don't think she can even get those words out now. You're giving her something greater than she could have ever hoped to ask for."

I wanted to believe my brother. With ever fiber and cell of my frozen being, I wanted to believe that what Jasper spoke was the truth. I was saving my wife, not damning her the way we all had been. She knew the limitations of this life, she knew that she would never again feel the way she had before walking into my life. But would the trade off be worth it? Would she love me as much when she began to wrestle with her own monster? My thoughts ran in an endless circle from there while another part of my mind fixed on the quieted conversation floating in from the other room. Margie had broached the subject of dying, but there was no sadness in Houston's voice, like I had assumed there would be.

_"I'm not scared, Margie. I never have been. I'm just terrified of leaving Edward."_

My eternal love, already playing her part more beautifully than I could've ever imagined. Number one rule of being a Cullen, the secret must always be kept. She hadn't even entered our world fully and she already seemed to know and accept that rule. She had never once given me a reason to doubt her, never wavered or showed an out of fear with the direction her life had taken. I still had the tendency to remind myself that things should have turned out differently for her. She should've been given the option of a life better than what was in my power to give. The beautiful, strong woman in the other room deserved far more than a vampire struggling to maintain his human facade. An immortal man that was condeming her to the same life he'd been born into.

_Stop berating yourself, Edward. _Alice's thoughts sang with her familiar bell-like quality as she appeared at Jasper's side. Once again, I'd become so absorbed in my own thoughts, my own self-deprication that my family had once again been able to sneak up on me. _You deserve happily ever after just as much as she does. And you deserve to have it together._

If only I could fully believe that, but the fear clutching at my frozen veins prevented me from being as confident as my family. They were so convinced that I would be able to do this, that I would be able to save Houston the same way Carlisle had saved us all. There was no doubt in any of their minds that this would not work out. Houston's transformation would be seamless and she would enter into her new life with the knowledge needed to make things as easily as possible. There was fear of the occasional slip, but I knew that none of us would hold that against her. After all, how could we? There wasn't a single person under this roof, with the exception of those whose hearts still beat, that was completely innocent. We'd all taken human life in some way or another. I had savagely stalked the corrupt and immoral, Rosalie had given herself justice by killing the men that had left her for dead, even my compassionate and loving parents had blood on their hands.

I didn't want that for Houston. I all out _refused_ to let her hands be stained because she had chosen the only way to stay with me. I would not let her become a true monster because she had unknowingly given in to the first and only selfish desire in over ninety years. I loved her too much to even let myself even _think_ of tainting her conscious.


	6. Chapter 6

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Six:**

If I needed proof of a higher power, I had been granted that in the most simple of ways.

The sun was out, shining brightly in one last, fleeting warm day in Forks. Winter was fast in approaching, I could smell it in the air every time I stepped off the front porch. It had been so long since Houston had even seen the sun shine for her own eyes. To feel the sun's rays caress her face and warm her skin. It hurt to see her so cooped up in the house, always wrapped tightly in layers of clothes and blankets so that her body temperature had a chance of staying normal. She was the worst she'd ever been, but yet I was still stalling. Still waiting to stop her heart.

It was selfish and agonizing, to watch her wake up each and every day with a small gasp of pain as she returned to the cancer-ravaged body that was barely functioning. Carlisle now had to keep a more careful eye on her since the infection that had crippled her in Texas still wasn't completely cured. She still had to battle impromptu fevers, night sweats that drenched her clothes and bedsheets. And above all, she still had to live with the agony that I would never again be able to feel.

But Jasper could.

Over the past few days, he had come to me several times, always quietly to talk about Houston and her desintegrating health. They couldn't understand why I was still waiting, why I was continuing to let Houston suffer. He could feel her pain as easily as if he were in her body and was always willing to use his gift of influencing moods and emotions to give her at least some semblence of peace. But the question was always right there, in the forefront of everyone's mind. Why hadn't I changed her yet?

At first, I didn't have a clear-cut answer for that. But as the hours stretched on, I realized a part of myself that I'd never noticed before. There was a tiny sliver of hope left in my body. Maybe a miracle would happen and the day would come when my wife awoke to find herself happy _and_ healthy. But that day was never coming and Esme had begrudgingly brought me to the words Houston had confided in her. _I_ was her miracle.

That simple sentence seemed to click things into place for me. No matter what, it seemed she would never fully see the monster that I always spied in my reflection. She didn't know what I was capable of, but she would find out once she became one of us. There would be no hiding from her then, not that I could hide much from her now or had ever been able to. But when her heart stopped beating and her eyes grew crimson, there truly wouldn't be anymore secrets between us. I would be free to be the man my family saw. And also, I would be the monster that I warred with constantly. I would no longer have to worry about hurting her with the simplest of touches, I wouldn't have to sit around and wait for her heart to make that final thump toward death.

Breathing in deeply, I let it out slowly and continued to stare out at the brightly-lit line of trees. I would not miss the days when I had to tightly reign in everything I felt for the woman I loved. I wouldn't long for the days I'd spent watching her waste away before my very eyes. Spinning on my heel, I headed upstairs and crossed the entryway of our bedroom in a matter of mere seconds.

Of course, Houston was awake. Her hair still hung limp down her back, hidden behind her skeletal shoulders and trapped against a mound of feathery white pillows. She turned her head when she heard me take in another deep breath and the smile that crossed her lips would have stopped my heart if it still beat. Even though she was dying, her body slowly giving up the fight, she looked just as radiant and gorgeous as she had the very first day I saw her smile at me. "Hi." She whispered, her voice rough with a recent bout of nausea. Her hand stretched out toward me and I didn't hesitate in joining her.

"I didn't mean to disturb you." I whispered and curled my fingers through hers as I leaned over to kiss her lips lightly. She was a little warmer today than she had been the night before, but I could see the fatigue in her eyes. She was still fighting, somehow gaining even more strength to give me the time I seemed to need to fulfill her wish. She was never going to make things easier on herself at my expense, I knew that and was reminded of it every time I stared into her bright green eyes. They were also more vibrant than they had been hours before and I hoped that had something to do with the few hours of sleep that Carlisle had been able to give her. Morphine was now a constant component in her bloodstream. In the back of my mind, I worried about her building a tolerance for the medication but then I remembered that her body was shutting down. It wasn't working properly anymore, nothing was strengthening her the way it was supposed to.

"You didn't." She shook her head slightly as she spoke quietly, her eyelids fluttering shut as she continued to smile up at me. I leaned back just in time to see her slowly stretch beneath the mound of blankets covering her and a soft sigh passed her lips. "I'm so _sore_. I'd give anything for a bath."

"A bath, huh?" I asked suddenly, a small smile overtaking my own lips as I gently squeezed her frail hand.

She looked up at me then and a tiny crease appeared between her eyebrows. Always skeptical. She eyed me in what I could clearly see as faux anxiety as I leaned over her again and swiped the tip of my index finger over the worry lines marring her pale forehead. "You just thought of something, didn't you?"

"I did." I nodded and grinned down at her, displaying my teeth. Her heartrate sped instantly and I knew that I hadn't scared her. She always seemed to have that reaction whenever she caught a smile on my face. Kissing her forehead, I straightened up and pulled the covers back from her legs. She shivered with a shift of air slid over the bare skin of her legs, then slowly moved to raise up on her elbows. We had done this many times before, she knew my actions well enough for me to not need words or instructions. I lifted her into my arms carefully and like always, she pulled a stray blanket away to cover herself. Even after all the time spent among our family, she was still very much self-conscious of how she looked. That impossibly beautiful paranoia was probably not going to go away any time soon and I found myself wondering how she would view herself when her skin was as cold and hard as mine. Would she be content with her reflection when her body became frozen forever on the cusp of womanhood?

She curled into me as best she could, resting her forehead against the side of my throat as I walked into the ajoining bathroom. "Stay put." I teased, winking at her as I carefully set her on the closed toilet seat then leaned over the large bathtub that was never used. Our bathroom was Houston's in every imaginable way.

"What are you planning?" She asked, her voice full of hidden laughter and curiosity as her eyes followed my every move. The taps were turned on and began to quickly fill the tub with hot water. Leaving that momentarily, I picked up two bottles that I knew she loved the most and turned to face her. A small, slightly mischevious smile curving my lips as I knelt in front of her.

"I'm trying to be a doting husband and do something for my wife. Indulge me, please?"

She rolled her eyes almost as soon as the words passed my lips, but the smile on her face gave her away. "Use the one in your left hand." She answered, knowing what I was getting at without me having to say a single word. Even with the boundaries and lines of separation, I often felt that she was my other half. As she had said long ago, it _was_ as if we had been designed for one another. I'd gone nearly a hundred and nine years alone because I had been waiting for her to be born and brought into my life. I turned away from her long enough to fill the tub with bath salts that smelled like vanilla and eventually stepped back with a grin once the taps had been turned off, the long and wide white tub filled nearly to the brim with bubbly water.

"May I?" I asked, using my most charming voice as I bowed dramatically in front of her and held out my hand. She giggled and faint patches of color spread across her cheeks as she accepted. The blanket was tossed aside easily then soon joined by the oversized shirt she had slept in for a few hours. I couldn't help but indulge in the rare sight before me as I held her against me, supporting all of her weight as I reached up to run a hand through her hair. "I don't think I'll ever be able to get over how beautiful you are, Houston."

She quickly hid her face in the fabric of my shirt, shaking her head slightly before she glanced down at the lack of space between us then met my gaze again. "Are you sure vampires have perfect vision? I'm starting to think you got jipped."

Of course, she would have a joke. I laughed lightly and rolled my eyes before kissing her cheeks, which were still faintly colored by blood and set her back down once her blanket had been spread over the toilet to protect her fragile skin from the cold porcelain. "There is nothing wrong with my eyes." I stated calmly, yet matter-of-factly as I stepped back and kicked off my shoes. My socks were the first to go and when I began to unbutton my shirt, her eyes rounded.

"Edward, what're you doing?"

"I'm taking a bath with my wife." My voice was still calm as I got the shirt undone and off my shoulders. I didn't look to see where it landed once the cotton slipped from my hand. My eyes, my entire focus was on the naked woman in front of me. The man in me writhed in agony, as he always did when I saw her in any state of undress. I couldn't have her the way my body craved, not without putting her at extreme risk. But that didn't mean my desire for her lessened. If anything, it just grew more and more profound as the days stretched out. I didn't say anything else, or give her a chance to second-guess me; shedding my jeans before I leaned over and easily pulled her back up against me. "Trust me." I asked, knowing that she already did, and brushed my lips against hers before I slowly turned her around and wound my arm around her stomach.

The sharp intake of breath rang clearly in my ears as I looped my other arm around her knees and picked her up off the floor. Her back didn't stray an inch from my chest as I stepped into the hot bathwater with her in my arms. My muscles coiled smoothly as I lowered her into the water. She hissed at first when the scalding temperature met her cool skin, but once we were both settled in the bathtub; her body supported against mine with her legs slowly stretching out between mine, she sighed happily and let her head fall back against my shoulder. "I wish I could tell you how good this feels."

"I have an idea." I smiled and perched my chin on her shoulder as my eyes took in every single flicker and change of her facial expressions. The relaxation process was slow for her, quiet sighs filling her throat now and then as her muscles loosened against mine. I could feel ever shock, every spasm fading from her frame and somehow, passing into mine. I could only imagine this being painful for her, even with my body against hers to serve as a buffer against the tub. For one, agonizingly fleeting moment, I wished that I were human. I wished to have the soft, breakable body that she had so I wouldn't have to worry about feeling like a rock separating her from another impenetrable surface. "Are you comfortable enough?"

"The most comfortable I've been in months." Her voice was just a happy whisper as she closed her eyes and tilted her face toward mine. I didn't hesitate in carefully molding my lips against hers, a low sigh of my own forming around my vocal cords as her warm, perfect lips caved against mine. Not breaking the chaste kiss, I reached out and picked up the cup that was kept in here so she could take a bath without having to move too much. Only, in those times, it had been Alice or Esme coming to her aid. This was the first time I got to help her bathe and I luxuriated in that decision of trust.

Grudgingly breaking the kiss, I leaned her head back and filled the cup with soapy water. "Keep your eyes closed, love." I whispered into her ear, easily feeling her shiver against me before I sent the water carefully cascading over her head. Her hair was wet within seconds and cast-off droplets began to bead against my chest automatically. The look on her face was instantly commited to memory, her eyes remaining closed as a contented smile transformed the lower part of her face. I repeated the manuever, gently pouring water over her head, then across her shoulders and chest; anything that remained above the waterline.

"Thank you." She sighed once I'd set the cup aside and opened her eyes to smile up at me. There was a dreamy look in her eyes and I was fiercely glad that I had decided to act on this impuse. Even though we couldn't be together in the ways normal husbands and wives were able to indulge in, we were creating our own source of intimacy. Her heart fluttered against my chest in its normal rhythm, neither of us being able to escape from the customary hitches that plagued her now. But in this moment, I didn't want her to think about being sick. I didn't want her to feel the fragility and sickness that gripped her tightly. My biggest reason for this was to have her feel normal. I wanted her to be able to live in the moment as a woman being pampered by her husband. And really, that was how I found myself seeing all of this. She would always look breakable to me because of her pulse and warm green eyes, but she would never look sick or unhealthy to me. I couldn't see that as I continued to watch the changes of her expression.

"I love you." I whispered then and carefully hugged her to me as my lips brushed over her wet temple. She sighed again and I knew her eyes were closed just by that tiny sound.

"You're way too good to me." She whispered and when I opened my own eyes to look at her, I found her staring at me carefully. I knew this look well, it was one that creased her features often. I couldn't help but wonder if she would ever fully realize just how much I depended on her, how entirely devoted to her I was. Even without her carrying my last name, without the wedding bands on our fingers, or my promise to make her immortal. It went beyond that. I didn't exist if she didn't. There was no world, no enticement to eternity without her there to share it with me. There was so much I wanted her to see, so much that I wanted to give her. I had to pay her back for the greatest gift she'd given me. For simply loving me and letting me love her back, I would give her the entire world if she so wished.

My mind quickly shifted as my thoughts centered around all of the things I wanted to give her in the upcoming new phase of our life. "If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you want to go?"

Her eyes remained closed as she processed my conversational tone. I didn't have to hear her thoughts to know she was picking my sentence apart, trying to figure out how to best answer my question. "Everywhere." She grinned and suddenly opened her eyes again. The green irises were more alive than I'd seen in a while, flooded with the hope of eternity. "I want to see everywhere and everything. As long as you're there to show it to me." She quietly went on but then her expression changed and she bit down on her lower lip lightly as she looked away. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." I breathed with no hesitation, my arms tightening around her slightly as I waited for her to speak again.

"What do you see when you look at me?" Houston sounded almost scared as she slowly looked back up at me, her hands slowly wrapping around my wrists underneath the water. "How can you still look at me with that same glint in your eyes? I can't imagine how hard all of this has been on you but yet, you've never wavered."

"And I never will." I promised abruptly, before I thought to answer her first two questions. I fell silent then, two facets of my mind coming together to help give me the words I would need next. "I see what I've always seen, Houston. I see your strength, your compassion and selflessness. You're physically beautiful to me, even though you may try to dispute me on that, you are. Your scars, all of the little imperfections you were scared to show me...I don't see them the same way. They're part of you, part of the woman I love more than my own life. These..." Trailing off, I glanced down to watch my fingers glide over the most recent of her surgery scars. The scars that had stolen her child-bearing abilities, but kept her alive. "They remind me of your fight, of how tenacious you've been. When I look at you, I can see so many things. I can see how tired you are of fighting, but yet you haven't given up. You're still with me and letting me have more time to fill you with human memories that you never thought you'd get to have. I may not be able to give you everything, Houston. But I can promise you that I'll give you everything that I can. I have and continue to give you every single thing that makes me who I am."

Tears filled her eyes quickly and her mouth rounded into a small _o_ as my answers filled her mind. I'd taken her by surprise, there was no denying that. But she had asked me for honesty and I would never deliver anything else. "I still can't believe you're real." She muttered then laughed in spite of herself.

The most heavenly of sounds was soon joined by my own laughter as I continued to glide my fingertips gently over her lower body. In spite of myself, I caved to another impulse, tentatively pressing my lips to her exposed, bare shoulder as I caressed the outside of her thighs with both hands. She sighed at that and her head fell back against my chest. There was a small amount of tension in her frame and I realized that she was trying to stay still. Always selfless, she kept her body and reactions in tight control. Probably out of fear that the slightest movement would send me into a frenzy and bring this moment to an abrupt end. My hands gently kneed into the tense skin underneath my touch and, against her will, she relaxed again.

"That feels good." She breathed, keeping her eyes closed as she tilted her head to press a kiss against the underside of my jaw. I stayed still under her attention when she left her lips lingering against my skin and slid her warm hands up my arms, my fingers continuing to relax the muscles in the back of her thighs before moving back up her body. My self-restraint made me able to keep from doing what I wanted most, knowing that neither of us were _quite_ ready for that. But it didn't stop me from touching as much of her exposed upper body as I could. My fingers had a mind of their own as I savored the texture of her flesh covering her stomach, sides, ribs, then finally; her breasts. Her breathing hitched then and her back arched minutely into my hand as my fingers glided over the ivory underside before nimbly sliding over nipples, then the indention of her breastbone.

"Please don't ever let me forget this." She begged quietly to herself as my hands moved over her collarbone, the curves of her shoulders, then down her arms. The kiss I pressed to the hollow of her throat was my silent promise. She wouldn't forget any of the good moments if I could help it.


	7. Chapter 7

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Seven:**

I hated hunting. Loathed it with a passion that rivaled the fiery burn eternally coating my throat. But it was a necessity.

Jasper had been the one to accompany me this time, along with Esme and Emmett while the others stayed behind to look after Houston. Even though her good days were becoming more frequent, there was no overlooking how drained she had become. The necessity of leaving for longer than a day had me on edge and I found myself constantly wondering what shape she would be in when I came home. Would I be too late? Would this be the hunting trip that doomed my bride's future?

I had gotten my fill of animal blood long ago, but it was pertinant that Jasper feed a little longer. His eyes had been darker than mine when we set out on this journey and his resistance required the stability only found on overnight excursions.

But I was still on edge. A peculiar feeling kept curling in the pit of my stomach, never letting me forget about its existance.

Jasper emerged suddenly from a crop of trees, Esme and Emmett hot on his heels. As soon as they saw my face, I was met with three sets of worried stares. Obviously I wasn't as good at hiding things as I had once been. Yet another thing changed by Houston's presence?

_What's wrong?_ Esme's anxious thoughts were the first to enter my head as they formed a semi-circle in front of the tree I had unconsciously leaned against while I waited.

"I'm not sure." I answered her thoughts as honestly as I could. Jasper's expression grew more perplexed then and I had to work to fight off the wave of calm he sent in my direction. "Thanks but no." I shook my head at him, hating the guilty flash of his eyes. "I'm pretty sure I need to concentrate on this feeling." Or at least, it certainly felt that way. But before anyone could say or think anything else, the cell phone in my pocket began to vibrate violently against my leg. I had the device out and to my ear before the thought to answer was clearly formed in my mind. Carlisle.

"What's wrong?" I barked automatically, grimacing when Esme winced at my rough tone. Carlisle never called until he had a dire need to. What I now knew to be anxiety had come from a clear place now. Something was wrong at home.

"You need to come home as soon as possible." Even though I could hear how calm he was, there was no mistaking the underlying current of fear lacing his voice.

"On our way." I answered then flicked the phone shut. I had the device in my pocket and was vaulting away from the tree before I remembered my audience.

"What was said?" Jasper asked, sensing my mood easily as he moved to follow me. I didn't need to tell them who had been on the phone, the answer was clear in my eyes.

"Carlisle just said we needed to get home." I shrugged as casually as I could, but my muscles still felt foreign and stiff. I glanced at Esme, then Emmett, and settled on Jasper before I looked down at the ground underneath my shoes. "You can stay if you need to, but I'm going back. I can't ignore this bad feeling anymore."

"We're with you." Emmett answered at once then the others nodded furiously in agreement. So, rather than argue with them, I set off in a run. I wasn't concerned with speed or their ability to keep up with me as I streaked through the thick growth surrounding us. Esme had once called me the fastest runner in our family and as my feet moved soundlessly against the earth, I began to pray that she was. That, I would be fast enough to face whatever was waiting for us at home before it got worse. Every single cell in my body screamed that Carlisle's call had stemmed from something to do with Houston and as I ran, a million different worst-case senarios unfolded.

We reached the house in record time, familiar scents filling my nose before Esme, Jasper, and Emmett had time to even hit the clearing surrounding our home. I didn't think twice in flying up the stairs to my bedroom, but when I reached the door, I was surprised to find Houston's hospital bed gone. One quick turn of my head confirmed that she wasn't on the couch either. She'd already been moved to the library.

I ignored the worried stares boring into my back as I nearly flew to my next destination. But nothing in the world could prepare me for what I encountered when I ran into the library. Houston and the bed had been moved to the center of the room, the large light overhead casting a bright glow over her still form. She was no longer wearing the shirt she had been when I left. It was completely gone now, only a white sheet covering her body; tucked underneath her still arms. An oxygen mask was secured over her nose and mouth, and an IV was once again protruding from her arm while a nearby machine beeped agonizingly slow.

"What happened?" I whispered and slowly advanced to the bed. Houston didn't stir when I gently took her hand into mine, my gaze never leaving her pale face as Carlisle came up beside me.

"Her heart stopped about an hour ago, Edward." He replied gravely and out of the corner of my eye, I could see his tired face bowed slightly. "I performed CPR and was able to restart it, but it can't keep going much longer. Her kidneys have finally shut down and there's blood filling her lungs now. She's vomiting blood." I flinched subtly when a hand curved around my right shoulder, diverting my thoughts from Houston and Carlisle, who was standing on my left side. "Edward, there's far too much strain on her heart now. She only has hours left at this point." _It has to be done now._ His thoughts went on where his voice had failed, creating an even more hollow pit in my stomach. _Her body just can't keep up anymore._

So it had to happen now. Houston wouldn't live to see the next morning any other way. I had no time now for goodbyes, my time had already run out.

"Can I wake her up?" I whispered, wincing again at how ancient my voice sounded. It physically hurt to talk, my vocal chords becoming so constricted with the grief that I couldn't release any other way. "Can I at least tell her what's going to happen next?"

"You can try." There was a sigh in Carlisle's answer and the hand on my shoulder squeezed reflexively.

I threw a glance to my right and found Esme staring at me with more sorrow and pain than I'd ever seen on her face before. They were hurting too. Sighing heavily, I moved almost mechanically as I leaned over the still frame of my wife, my fingers gently stroking her freshly washed hair. "Houston?" I asked quietly, hoping feverishly against hope that she would be able to draw enough strength to look at me. To open her human eyes and look at me one last time. "Sweetheart, if you can hear me, I need you to open your eyes."

My luck held and seconds after my voice failed again, her eyes did open. I could see the effort expended as she tilted her head toward me, her fingers weakly gripping mine. If my heart could beat, it would've been breaking right about now.

"I know you're tired." I began to talk quickly, afraid that my time would run out before I had the chance to say everything I wanted to say. "I know you're in pain too, my love. It'll all be over soon, I promise."

Her free hand twitched then rose toward the mask covering her face and preventing her from speaking. I obliged her and gently pulled the mask off her face, Carlisle coming around my other side to fully take the mask away. She wasn't going to need it now. I was barely aware of the sterile, metal syringe that was slid into my hand as I continued to stare at my dying wife. "I'm...sorry." She sighed and even more grief swelled within me. She was apologizing to me. Here she lay, dying because I had been too set on prolonging all of this, and _she_ was the one apologizing.

"There's no need for that." I whispered and moved closer to her, straining to perfect the smile she loved so much.

It didn't work though, and I found that confirmation in the slight twitch of her lips. "I love you." She sighed and squeezed my hand again, reminding me of a feather barely tickling my skin. Her energy was gone, she was fading.

"I love you too." I replied in a quiet rush. I squeezed her hand one more time then leaned over and pressed my lips to hers. Her response was weak, but I could hear the machine jump slightly as her heartbeat accelerated. I knew it was the wrong thing to do, to kiss her when her heart was already working overtime to keep her alive. But it was something I needed to do. I needed to feel her lips on mine, to provide some sort of distraction as I shifted every so slightly. "I love you so much." I whispered against her lips then suddenly shoved the needle of the syringe into her chest, pushing the plunger down before I could let myself even think of turning back.

Her pulse spiked irratically and her eyes flew open as I pulled the needle out and tossed the syringe aside. I wasn't sure if her eyes were still open or not as I reopened the scars on her neck, the first place I'd tasted her blood. The thirst didn't attack me as fiercely as it did before, I was moving too quick to let it. Her breathing grew more pronounced as my tongue slid over her skin to seal the wound. To trap even more of my venom in her failing body. I ignored the worried eyes of my family as I moved over Houston, creating and resealing wounds at her wrists, the inside crease of her elbows once I'd removed the IV, then her thighs and finally, her ankles.

Once I'd released my toxin into every single part of her body, I forced myself to straighten back up. Carlisle had removed the heart monitor as I worked, but none of us needed it. I could hear her heart more clearly than I'd ever been able to hear it before, now pumping venom through her veins to kill the rest of her internal organs. Her eyes were closed now and I could tell that she had lost consciousness for the last time. Carlisle's thoughts explained that he had injected morphine into her IV shortly before calling me, the painkiller mixing in with her blood and my venom to hopefully ease her transformation. I hated to think of the pain I had just unleashed on her, but there was nothing else I could do. I had finally fulfilled my promise to take her pain away, to stop her heart and give her eternity.

The rest, agonizingly, was up to her. All I could do now was wait and watch as her heart galloped to its final thump.

Time ceased to mean anything after that, the hours slipping by soundlessly as I stared at the immobile body in front of me. I hadn't left the library since finding Houston in here. I had sworn to everyone _but _her that I wouldn't leave until she opened her eyes again. No matter if she screamed, writhed in agony, and cursed me; I couldn't bring myself to leave as her body froze for the rest of eternity. I couldn't leave her side, no matter what it would cost me in the end to hear her beg for death.

But she made no sound. She hadn't moved once since I plunged the syringe into her heart. She had become completely still and the only clue to her still being alive was the light thrumming of her heart as it coursed venom throughout her veins. The others came and went, Carlisle being the most frequent of visitors to track Houston's progress. But everytime someone new entered the room, nothing changed. She was completely lifeless as the fire burned through her body.

Alice had come in to talk to me about the announcement needed for the local paper, announcing Houston's official death and burial plans. I couldn't find the strength to acknowledge her words, simply muttering that whatever she wanted to say was fine with me. But what had surprised me and finally pulled my eyes from my still wife was the information that Houston had already taken care of the death announcement. She'd planned everything meticulously as she waited to be changed, down to the smallest detail. Of course, it didn't really surprise me. Houston shouldered so much that she probably felt it was her responsibility to make sure she had everything taken care of for us.

But as I continued to watch her, I realized that I'd been depending on the preparations for the story we were going to release into Forks. I'd needed the distraction, something to occupy my mind so that I couldn't dwell on the pain I knew she was in. I kept expecting her to suddenly regain consciousness and begin screaming in agony. But it never happened, she never moved as time continued to ease past us all with no notice.

My only measurement of time came in the form of my family's arrival and departure from the room. Esme kept trying to lure me from the room, to give myself some sort of break while Houston transformed. She hadn't wanted me to see this, my mother had used as an arguement. But really, what was there to see? She just laid lifeless on the curved hospital bed. The muscles in her face would twitch every so often and I began to live for those moments. It was the confirmation I needed, along with the slow beating of her heart as it continued to pump sluggishly. Alice and Jasper always came into the room together, their fingers tightly linked as Jasper tasted and rearranged the mood in the large, dark room. As much as I wanted, his gift never helped. I always felt hollow and worried long before he stole quietly from the room. I could only imagine how my feelings intermingled with his.

I was alone when I recieved another marker of time. This time in the form of Houston's skin. My body acted on it's own accord as I straightened up with my arms digging into my thighs. The light was still shining brightly over her, but the glow it cast over her skin was beginning to change already. I didn't need a closer inspection to see the familiar hardening of her skin. The color and freckles were decreasing in slow incriments, making way for the glint that would make her unable to interact with humans while the sun shone. My lips twitched involuntarily as her voice filled my head, reminding me of the first time she'd ever seen my skin react to direct sunlight. She would be looking forward to shining right beside me when the time came.


	8. Chapter 8

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__The point of view changes with this chapter! I kind of stole the idea from __Breaking Dawn__ so that I wouldn't be tempted to have a long story, a short sequel, then a longer third part._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

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**Houston**

**Chapter Eight:**

Pain was everywhere. No matter how hard I tried, there was no escaping it.

It wasn't the familiar searing that I'd become used to after years of living with cancer. No, this was new and had me even more powerless than the old pain.

I was vaguely aware of the painful prick in my chest, only able to fully concentrate on Edward's lips moving against mine. It wasn't a normal kiss, my hazy mind had been able to confirm that much as I struggled against unconsciousness. His lips didn't feel as cold as they normally did, no matter that I was already used to the permanant freezing temperature of my husband's lips. There was also a sense of urgency, of fear that he would never vocally express to me. I felt more weird sensations once his lips had left mine, but before I could make sense of anything or even attempt to put the pieces together, unconsciousness snared me and refused to let go.

There were gaping holes in the timeline, the only thing I'd been clearly able to remember was Edward leaving for an overnight hunting trip. It was required, since Jasper had gone the longest without hunting. His eyes had been closer to black than anyone else in the family and I'd remembered worrying about his abstinence. Would hunting further away give him a better advantage to keep with the Cullens' 'no-humans' rule?

Everything after that was lost, a large black spot where my thoughts should have been. No doubt because of something going horribly wrong with me. I couldn't forget about the pain that had grown sometime after Edward's departure. And the few, fleeting moments when I'd been awake to actually see him and hear his voice, I'd heard Carlisle's whispered explaination of what had happened in his absence. My heart had stopped. Huh, okay that explained the longest and darkest of spots. But how had my heart been restarted?

My thoughts broke before I could fully get a grip on everything that was happening. It felt like someone had injected straight fire into my veins. I could feel it slowly mixing with my blood, burning everything in it's wake as it began to curl from my fingers and toes, into my body. There was a larger concentration of it in my chest, where I knew my heart was supposed to be. It had still been beating though, Carlisle had brought me back shortly before I woke to hear the voice of my angel. But why did it feel like it was on fire? That each vital pump made my toes want to curl and a scream to erupt in my throat?

But I couldn't scream. I couldn't even _move._ It was then that I could feel something else flowing through my body, making me feel as if there were some invisible weight on my body. Either that or I had been enclosed in something small and moving was impossible. But even with the crushing weight against my body, I could strangely think coherently. Blackness was all around me and it felt like the weight holding down my limbs was also holding my eyes shut. And as my mind began to swarm dizzily through the darkness, I saw this as a blessing.

Maybe this, morphine I was sure of it now, it was just what I would need to keep me from screaming and crying in pain. I could remember all the conversations I'd had with Edward about what would happen when it came time to turn me. Carlisle had been strong enough to stay silent and hidden during the three days it took for his transformation to be complete. But the others hadn't been so lucky with self-restraint. Edward had confessed, in an unabashed moment of honesty, that he'd screamed and begged for death. That the fire engulfing his body had been a pain worse than death. He had _welcomed_ it with open arms while he burned. So had Rosalie, who had given me the knowledge that screaming didn't help. It had only made her throat raw and the thirst that had waited for the end of her change had been a little more unbareable.

So because of that, because of my family's stories, I had made the silent promise that I would do my best to remain silent. To keep the pain inside my body and inside my own mind. I wouldn't make Edward suffering, knowing full well that he would go against my wishes and not leave my side while I changed. I didn't want him to carry the images of watching me writhe in agony, asking for death; with him for the rest of eternity. It was painful enough for him to carry his own memories of human death. I didn't want him to carry mine as well.

The pieces slowly began to reconnect themselves as I lay still, trying in vain to remember what room of the house I'd been placed in. Had they succeeded in moving me before I turned? Would Edward get to carrying out the surprise he'd refused to tell me about? The same surprise that he had sworn our family to protect as well? What would things be like when I did wake up? Providing I could hold on and survive the crushing black and acidic fire? Would we simply pick up where things had left off and resume life? Only, this time, with me as a willing participant.

And how would things be different for me in this new life? The only thing I would be limited by would be my thirst. I wouldn't have to worry about getting winded, or not being able to keep up simply because my body had just been unable to function. I had to admit that I'd thought about it countless times, trying to imagine myself with the same skin as my family's, with bright crimson eyes that would soon cool into the gold that defined my family. I tried to picture it all in my head...healthy, beautiful, finally able to enjoy life with my husband and family... All of it felt like some dream that was always going to be just out of reach. That I'd never get to the point where I could stand up and hold my own.

But now that time had come. The beginning was the toughest part to get through. I _had_ to survive this firey hell. I _had_ to show my family that I was strong enough to be a Cullen. Not because they required that of me, never that reason. After my mother, Edward and his family had been the first people to accept me as I was. Damaged goods with an excessive amount of baggage. But that hadn't deterred them, and I already knew that they would have no high expectations of me in this new life. But that didn't mean I held the same thoughts they did. I would hold myself to the highest of standards. I had to make absolutely sure that I would be good enough, strong enough, to withstand eternity with someone that was more angel than human. Even if he saw himself as a monster, even if he would soon see _me_ as one...he was still the purest thing in my world. He was my salvation, my safetynet. I had to prove that there was a small part of me that truly believed I deserved him and his immortal love.

I lost all senses of time as my thoughts drifted then wove into one another, creating senseless senarios and images in my mind. The darkness still hung like a veil around me, precariously drawn back but always on the verge of swinging back into place. It was kind of a funny mental image, but that was all my tired mind could formulate. All of my focus and energy was already being put to other uses, I had to keep my body still as I continued to burn internally.

Sometimes that focus and energy would waver, the heat would flare agonizingly and I was momentarily lost in the flames. The pain was past unbareable and fear would grip me whenever I realized I could no longer remember why I was doing this. Everything was completely overthrown by the darkness, but I had to keep fighting. Images, though hazy and barely visible, kept flashing through my mind; acting as the hint of a life preserver. I needed something, _anything_ to keep me fighting and as the pain began to swirl more noticably through my chest, I held on to my love for him more fiercely than I'd ever held onto it before. All of the energy I'd unconsciously focused on mentally begging to die was transferred to wishing for it to all be over soon. That the more horrific pain of my life would subside and I could open my eyes and find the patient gaze I loved more than anything else.

It felt agonizingly slow but eventually, time came back to me in some form. The minutes didn't drag quite as long as they once had. I honestly couldn't tell which came first in this new direction of my transformation. Time felt like it was restarting, the morphine was burning off, and I got stronger.

I didn't know that I was regaining control over my body until my toes twitched involuntarily. It would be even toughter for me to stay still now that I no longer had morphine on my side, holding me down in an agonizing grip. The only downside to my suddenly regaining movement was the fire still raging within me, burning my veins and slithering through my damaged organs while my heart continued to beat vibrantly against my ribs. That struck me as odd considering how close to death I'd been when Alice had found me and called for Carlisle. I was beginning to remember things now that Edward's venom was burning off the morphine.

I couldn't forget why I was forcing myself to stay still, or why screaming was not an option. As the minutes dragged on, the image of Edward's inhumanly beautiful face became clearer and clearer in my mind. My life-preserver was bringing me closer and closer to the surface, I could just _feel_ it.

My fingers twitched against my side as more, new sensations began to assault me. I could hear noises now, the faint breathing of a figure beside me, quiet voices in the first level of the house. I hung on to those noises with dear life, measuring time with the unnecessary breaths from the source of my love. Noises began to fill my mind, faint stirs and whispers of air as things moved around me. I still couldn't bring myself to open my eyes, I refused to admit defeat after so long. No matter how badly I wanted to stare into Edward's eyes, I couldn't let myself. That would be my reward once the fire had burned throughout my body. I would have the rest of eternity to bask in the perfection that had claimed me for his own.


	9. Chapter 9

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

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**Chapter Nine:**

The pain was finally beginning to fade, the heat receeding from my arms and legs and I continued to measure time with the gentle intake and exhales of air around me. Edward was still in the room, my senses were growing sharp enough that I could finally put my finger on the scent that had originally clung to his jacket that first day he'd accompanied me to the hospital.

It felt so long ago, having that memory relive itself in my mind. I'd been so closed off, so unsure of Edward and I'd had no idea what I was setting myself up with. I'd had no idea at the time that I was denying someone that I was completely powerless again. Margie had been right in an analogy she'd made a long time ago, back when I was still fighting my feelings for Edward. She had been the one to muse that it was almost as if there were magnets buried deep beneath our skin, always pulling us toward each other. No matter how hard one of us, or both fought, that pull was irreversible. I had never been able to deny my initial attraction, then later my love, for Edward. It had been like trying to keep the sun from orbiting the world.

My mind focused clearly when I realized that there was no longer any firey pain in my limbs. All of it had come together in my torso and was quickly pumping back toward my heart. The heat was becoming increasingly more unbareable, but I could now hear voices in the room and feel pressure on the inside of my left elbow.

"She still hasn't moved." Edward's beautiful voice sounded even more magical, like I was actually hearing him speak for the first time in my entire life. The urge to open my eyes, just sneak the quickest of peeks threatened to overthrow me, but was somehow contained in a new, small facet of my mind. There was so much room to think now, a lot more than I'd ever had in my human days. As I forced myself to remain motionless as the gentle pressure moved from the curve of my elbow, to my wrist; I also ran my angel's voice through my mind, hoping with another part of my mind that he would speak again. Just a few more words and I could make it. Perhaps his voice, him speaking quietly over me would create the inner strength I needed to keep still.

The pain was increasing in my chest now, my heart hammering more violently than it ever had before. Galloping toward it's final, agonizing beat. I wanted to scream, thrash around...claw out my heart just to escape the pain. But strength was flowing through me more freely now and as the seconds continued to drip by, I managed to remain still. I couldn't let my body betray me now, not after how far I'd come.

But instead of his voice acting as a life-preserver, it became my undoing when he fell into a conversation with Carlisle, who I could now hear clearly in the room.

"It's almost over, Edward." Carlisle was unusually quiet, but hearing him speak sparked the unfamiliarity that Edward's voice had sparked. I was going to experience everything for the very first time, it seemed. And in a way, that was pretty accurate. Everything was going to be much more heightened, that much was clear by my newfound ability to hear all throughout the house.

"What if I was too late?" He sounded like he was in so much pain and my fingers ached reflexively to reach out and touch him. To give him just some small amount of relief that I was still here, but now willingly held captive in my own body. I refrained and forced my muscles to lock down. His pain would end soon, I was absolutely sure of that. I could endure.

"You did everything right." Carlisle was my voice of relief. Love and gratitude swelled in my burning heart at his words, somehow easing the uncontrollable desire to move. "Her heart's beating so strongly now, Edward. Can't you hear it? I promise, it's almost over."

"I hope you're right." Edward's voice was now just a breathless whisper, though I could hear it as clearly as if he were yelling from across the room. But when the air shifted around me and his breath blew across my ear, it became my undoing. "Houston? Love, can you hear me? Open your eyes for me, _please_ Houston."

Air expelled from my chest so rapidly that no amount of my new strength could have held it in. I realized belatedly that it came in the form of a scream as my inner war raged into it's final battle. My heart, pumping feverishly against the constricting venom, wasn't gaining any proverbial ground. It was a losing fight on both ends and caused my resolve to break. Both hands tightened into fists as my back arched off the flat surface underneath me, faint hints of a new aroma assaulting my nostrils when I stirred the air. I'd been moved, when had I been moved?!

"Houston!" Edward's voice broke with his cry as my body fell back, but my fingers remained clenched as the fire constricted, concentrating inside my last, remaining organ with a final, excrutiating surge. My body bowed slightly again under the attack and a dull, hollow sound rang in my ears; followed closely by two stutters then one final thud. Everything went silent then. I could no longer hear the thumping that had constricted my body in the worst of ways, nor could I hear the habitual breathing I'd used to mark the time. Even the lower floors, I realized now I was on the third level of the house, was quiet. No one moved, nothing stirred. I could feel a small crease forming between my eyebrows as I continued to stretch my hearing, searching for something, _anything_ that could tell me what was going on now that my heart had taken that final beat.

"She's about to wake up." A chorus of bells assaulted my hearing suddenly and my fingers unfolded quickly against my thighs. My eyebrows furrowed even more and I had to take a second to actually remember how to open my eyes. It had seemed like such a normal gesture before and for the life of me, I couldn't figure out why it was so difficult now. Maybe it was underlying fear, the anxiety of not knowing what I would wake up to. And more importantly, _who_ I would wake up to.

I felt a firm amount of pressure slide over my hand and air filled my throat suddenly when the touch felt foreign. It wasn't cold, not the freezing sting of ice that I was used to whenever a member of my family touched me. But I remained on my back, my newly spacious mind working frantically to piece everything together. Who could _possiby_ be trying to hold my hand right then?! My body moved on its own accord then, muscles coiling tightly as I wrenched into an upright position. I hadn't even noticed my eyes opening but suddenly I could see absolutely everything. I could smell the fresh paint that assaulted my nostrils and choked my airways. The scent was coming from all around me but I couldn't pull my eyes from the image directly in front of me.

Even though it was well across the room from me, I could see it as clearly as if I was standing right in front of it. A photograph hung on the wall, the silver frame glittering faintly in the moonlight I realized was streaming into the room. There was a dim light from somewhere beside me, but I couldn't let myself focus on that. I was too distracted by the photo in front of me. Inching off the bed, I completely forgot about everything else as I moved closer to the picture.

A small squeak passed my lips when I jerked to a stop, realizing that I'd made it to the other way in literally no time at all. Maybe a fraction of a second had lapsed between the time I sat up and the time it took me to reach the other side of the room. I could still see the smiling faces in the photo clearly and a sharp gasp slipped past my lips. There, in all his immortal perfection and glory stood Edward. He was dressed in a jet black suit, white button down, and golden tie that matched his eyes beautifully. He was standing underneath a candle-lit white archway overflowing with flowers and ribbons in soft shades of white and gold. But there, standing beside him, was a young woman with soft brown hair curled and piled atop her head. Her dress was white with a golden V down the bodice, but that wasn't what surprised me the most. What shocked me was how vibrant she looked. Even though her cheeks had sunken in somewhat, there was still a soft tracing of her cheekbones as she smiled beside Edward. With another gasp, a murky memory filled my mind's eyes. It was _me_ standing beside Edward, in all my human imperfections and sickness. It was a photograph that Rosalie had taken on our wedding day, shortly after the ceremony had ended.

"Houston?" The beautiful harmony of his voice pulled my thoughts instantly from the picture and I whirled around effortlessly to find the source of such perfection. I found Edward, still standing beside the bed I'd unconsciously climbed off of, looking anxious and perplexed with his darkening eyes fixated on me.

My head tilted instinctively as I took a tiny step toward him. My eyes roamed his face greedily, taking in every single thing I'd never been able to see with my human eyes. His skin was still smooth and pristine, but now it looked like marble draped with satin. His hair glinted brightly against the light streaming in from the window to my direct left. I couldn't even let myself glance out of the window to figure out what room of the house I was in. It didn't matter. Nothing but the gorgeous creature standing in front of me matter in that moment. "Edward?" I whispered and jumped instantly. My voice sounded so _different_, even in the quiet tones of a whisper. There was a certain undercurrent of bells to my pitch now and I giggled unconsciously at the comparisons running rampant through my mind.

"It's me, love." He nodded and I waited impatiently for my pulse to break into a sprint when he grinned at me. It was the same smile from all the memories I'd drudged up and flipped through as I lay burning. The breath-taking smile that had given me something to hold onto when all I wished for was death. It took me another fraction of a second to realize that my heart would never race again, but he would still always have an impact on my breathing.

New scents assaulted me mercilessly but I paid them no attention as I flew across the room and threw my arms around my husband's neck. It'd finally happened. I was finally Mrs. Edward Cullen in every single way, shape, and form.


	10. Chapter 10

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**__ Hey guys! Another chapter. I apologize now, these are a little longer than some of the other chapters I've posted. But now that Houston's awake, it's just kinda flowing! And thank you, THANK YOU for all the reviews. I promise I read them and adore seeing each new one. Please keep the reviews coming! I'm anxious to know exactly what you all think._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

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**Chapter Ten:**

"I can't believe I made you say ow."

The smile on Edward's face was patient as his eyes continued to sweep over every single change in my face. I was still terrifed of looking in a mirror to see just how much my reflection had changed. Even back before my heart stopped, I hadn't wanted to see. If Alice, Esme, and Rosalie hadn't been a million times stronger than me, I wasn't even sure if there would be any documented proof of my and Edward's wedding. I'd adamantly refused to look in a mirror that day, I was too scared that the image of myself in my dress would taint the day's festivities.

But now, as I stood in the room I'd waken up in, which was Edward and my room completely redone, I found myself wondering just what Edward was seeing. Which frozen imperfections he was commiting to memory. Now that I was like him, with so much more room to think and wonder than I'd ever thought possible, I knew that he would never have been able to forget anything about me since I'd come into his life. During my human days, I'd been convinced of that same thing; that there wasn't a single thing on this earth that could completely erase my memories of him. But now that the veil had been completely been taken off my eyes, the difference between my human memories and my vampire memories were completely different.

It took some searching, but as I stood there, gazing aimlessly out the large window that still made up the south wall of our room, I forced myself to recall everything. Even the bitter memories that made my eyes sting the way they used to when tears built up. But I was never going to be able to cry again, my new body was physically incapable of creating that gesture. Still, I forced myself to see everything through my former eyes. They were all murky and dim at best, like someone had turned out almost every single light around me when I memorized my human days with my family.

"I warned you that you would be extremely powerful when you woke up." His perfect voice was quiet as he breathed against my ear, now standing behind me with his arms wrapped around my waist. I'd been re-dressed while I burned, by Alice of course. I couldn't put up a fight while unconscious, but the blue silk sundress was starting to grate on my nerves. Apparently my disinterest in fashion had traveled with me from my old body to my new one. I was grateful for that, but before I could form a quiet sigh of distain, my thoughts shifted to the new pressure surrounding me. Edward didn't have to be cautious and gentle with me anymore. There was no longer the fear that he would crush me if he wasn't in tight control of his strength. It made me giggle to remember that _I_ was now the one that had to be careful not to break _him_. I was finally capable of making him, and everyone in the house, feel pain. Or at the very least, discomfort. I'd settle for that since I still cringed at the thought of hurting anyone in my family.

"You were definitely right." I sighed and rested my head, very carefully, back against his shoulder. It was difficult to have so much power in my muscles now after years of weakening to the point of death. But it was what I had to do now, so that I didn't unintentionally hurt the man standing behind me. It was a price I was willing to pay until the time came when I was evenly matched against him. A few years felt like nothing compared to the eternity now laid out in front of us. "I still can't believe all of this." I breathed and closed my eyes for a few, brief seconds so that I could collect my thoughts. Nothing about Edward felt cold to me now, not his arms against my now-perfect abdomen, or his breath blowing against my ear with every unneeded breath he took. I understood now what he meant about breathing no longer being necessary. I drew no more relief in filling my air with lungs. Breathing now just meant that I had access to one of my most powerful senses.

"It's only been a couple of hours since you woke up, Houston." He sounded unwaveringly patient as he pressed a kiss to my temple then rested his chin on my shoulder. "I can only imagine what's going through your mind right now." He went on, then paused. My eyebrow arched instantly and I whiped my head around to see the expression on his face. He straightened up when I was facing him and my eyebrow fell back into place when he reached up to smooth the crease away with the pad of his thumb. "I still can't hear your thoughts. Whatever kept me out before is still working."

"Odd." I muttered with a small frown on my face. I felt a faint flicker of aggravation at that but pushed it aside when another emotion suddenly attacked me. Desire. Now aware of just how close we were standing, with the old barriers long gone, I felt every single curve of his body against my new skin. His clothes, of course, were smooth and freshly laundered, probably Alice's doing. She wouldn't want me to wake up with Edward wearing the same thing he'd been wearing when my transformation started. But even then, I'd been so sick that I couldn't remember now what the last thing my human eyes had seen covering his body.

"You all right?" His voice broke through my thoughts easily and centered them all around him yet again. I now understood his singular mention of distractions back when I had first found out about his immortality. But I wasn't entirely sure that I would ever have that problem if he was in a fifty mile radius of me. Edward still held so much power over me that he was able to push everything into a dark corner of my mind. I'd assumed, always while getting ready for this, that I wouldn't be able to focus on anything but the thirst. The fire-like burn that would forever hold my throat, and me for the first years of my new life, hostage.

But it wasn't until I consciously thought of it that I noticed the unfamiliar tickle in the back of my throat. I wasn't looking forward to feeling my throat on fire for the very first time. I wasn't desperate to experience the pain I'd put Edward through every single time I was near him with my heart still beating. "Just...confused." I muttered after about a half-second of thought. Everything was so _quick_ now, and that was another thing that took some getting used to. Of course, he would notice my lapses in conversation, but only because he truly knew what I was going through now.

"Why're you confused?"

"Because I..." I frowned again and actually wiggled a little in his embrace. The tickling in the back of my throat was growing more profound, but somehow held at bay by the desire I'd thought would fade until I had more control over my new set of needs. "Remember how you always told me that my number one thought would center around blood? That for a while at least, I wouldn't be able to focus on anything other than being constantly thirsty?"

"Yes." He responded slowly, well slowly for him, the low current of harmony that was his voice stretching the simple syllable out. Understanding dawned on his expression, but I was instantly aware that he was drawing the wrong conclusions. "I'm so sorry." He breathed and rested his forehead against mine. I couldn't control the urge to reach up and swipe my fingers over his jaw as his eyes closed, but he went on; explaining his apology quietly. "I forgot all about your thirst. It must be causing you pain by now."

Even with the expanse of his skin touching mine, my eyebrows still furrowed as his words rang in my ears. The dull tickling in my throat grew to a burning fire abruptly and I was momentarily caught off balance by it. I'd had no idea of what to expect, how could any vampire appropriately explain this feeling to a human? There weren't words. I swallowed mechanically and left my hand against the smooth marble of his throat. "It actually wasn't bothering me until just now." I mumbled in quieted awe. He picked up on my new tone and quickly straightened up to look at me. Confusion was clearly etched around his eyes and the momentary tightening of his lips as he continued to stare at me. My heart, had it still the ability to beat, would've been racing under his perplexed stare.

How was it possible that I was only just now feeling the effects of my transformation? What did it say about me that my husband's close proximity had the ability to completely derail me and make me feel normal? It wasn't right, I could see that in his expression, but the new knowledge made me fleetingly glad. Clearly I wasn't acting the way my family had originally thought I would.

"Is that bad?"

"Of course not. But...it does make me curious. What were you thinking about before I apologized?"

My head bowed involuntarily and an old image of me blushing filled my mind. Yet another thing that I was no longer capable of. My poker face, if it could even be called that, was more convincing now without the sudden rush of blood to my cheeks. But even without that humanistic gesture, Edward would know exactly what was going on inside my mind. Surely that hadn't changed with everything else. "It's...too embarrassing."

"No." His voice was like velvet as he caught me before I could fully turn away from him. I blinked in surprise when I was suddenly whirled back around and pressed firmly against his body. There was the faint inkling to pull away from him anyway, my strength already coiling my muscles. But I pushed it aside and focused on the new expression contorting Edward's features. I couldn't pull myself from him if I wanted to. It was still purely impossible for even an inch of space to exist between us. And now that I was whole and healthy and unbreakable, I didn't want any space between us. The desire I'd been feeling just seconds before surged reassuringly through my veins and made me clearly aware that the first time had not been a fluke. I was feeling everything that I'd resigned to not discovering again for a very long time. "Please tell me?"

I whimpered almost involuntarily when the seductive undertone of his voice caused my thoughts to race on ahead of me, creating all the mental images that I'd secured away because of my weakeness. Images that I couldn't act on because if the danger they envoked. But now there was no danger, there was only the possibility of me hurting him. Which still made me want to laugh. I reigned it in when I saw the full power of my husband's eyes for the very first time. The nearly black irises grew even darker as they smoldered, resembling molten dark chocolate. _Very_ dark chocolate. Some part of my brain cut off from the inviting thoughts of finally getting to appreciate Edward's body and wondered idly what _my_ eyes looked like now. Was it hurting Edward to look at me and not see my green eyes anymore, but crimson where the unobtrusive green had once been? Did he hate the fact that the monster he held so much distain for was now lurking in my own vision? "You don't play fair." I huffed quietly, still surprised that my voice sounded like a windchime and forced myself to look away. Though only marginally when I suddenly found myself staring at his shoulder, instead of his eyes. I still heard the ghost of a chuckle perfectly as he shifted against me, lightly rubbing my bare arms as he waited for the rest of my response. "I was...I want you."

That caused a quick jerk in his movements then he forced me to look up at him again, his expression resembling the one he'd worn when I told him that the nagging thirst hadn't really been a problem for me. "You what?"

"I. Want. You." I went on, enunciating every single word clearly, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I knew that my thoughts, wants, and needs were all sorts of mixed up but I didn't care. I didn't care that I was supposed to be wanting to hunt, not wanting to get my husband naked so that we could finally enjoy everything that'd been forbidden to us while I was still human. But no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't push all of the lingering, senusal thoughts from my mind completely. It was too difficult with him standing as close as he was.

Edward didn't have a chance to say anything, his face still perplexed when the rest of our family suddenly burst into the room. Alice was at my side and pulling me from Edward in a matter of seconds, chattering on about _something_ as I continued to look anxiously at my husband. What was going through his mind right then? Suddenly, I wished for the same gift he had. Just one tiny glimpse into the chaos that were probably clogging up his mind mercilessly right then. This was all going wrong, that much was obvious.

"Houston!" Alice chirped impatiently and my focus snapped onto her.

"I didn't do it!" I yelped, shooting her an apologetic look before I glanced at Carlisle, then Jasper. Jasper's eyes were blatantly fixated on me, his eyebrow furrowed slightly. I could only imagine what he was feeling from me right then. I looked away guiltily and forced myself to pay attention to the tiny vampire standing in front of me.

"I was just asking what you thought of the dress." She snapped, still impatient and stepped away from me. Her eyes scanned my body quickly and I felt even more guilty for not looking at myself in the mirror yet. I wasn't quite ready for that at the moment. A little bubble of bliss had unconsciously formed in my mind, comforting me with the unfounded hope that I looked just as breathtaking as her, Rosalie, and Esme.

"It's perfect." I responded automatically and glanced over when I heard another quiet chuckle. Edward had thawed out with his sister's words and he was now staring at me appreciatively. Yeah, like _that_ was going to help my concentration! "Thank you for dressing me."

"No problem." She waved my thanks off with the flick of one hand then looked at Carlisle when he shifted. The change of air swirled around me and I took the opportunity to familarize myself with the new scents of my family. None of them smelled _quite_ the way Edward did, but I didn't really expect that they would. Our attractions toward each other had always run beyond the boundaries of superficial looks.

"Are you ready to hunt?" Carlisle asked, his quiet voice patient and inquisitive. Something faint flickered in my mind with his voice, and I surmised that he was desperately trying not to launch into a million and one questions about my transformation. He'd always been thirsty for knowledge.

The dull fire in my throat crackled and came to the forefront of my mind. I nodded mutely then looked fearfully over at Edward. This was the part of his life that he'd always kept hidden from me. He'd never wanted me to see him like this. But did that still apply, now that I was so entirely wrapped in his world? I needed to be taught, I'd known that from day one, but would he be willing to teach me everything I needed to know in order to survive?

There was a small seed of fear in my mind as the conversation continued to swirl around without me. Jasper was still staring intently at me, probably trying to gauge my moods in case he had to step in to restrain me. I hoped he didn't find anything, but I still couldn't ignore the small surge of fear rippling through me. What if I encountered a human on my first hunt? Would I have the ability to pull away, to restrain myself so that my record remained as untarnished as Rosalie? As far as my memory could tell me, she was the only one in my family that had never let a drop of human blood pass her lips. Everyone else had their slips, of course; Edward's record coming in a close second after Rose's. He'd only tasted the blood of humans he found unfit to exist. The murderers, rapists, and corrupt that had crossed his path and triggered his thirst.

Edward came to my side then and lightly laid a hand across the small of my back. The electricity I'd felt when he would touch my human skin was now overpowering with all these new senses and flesh differences powering them. I swallowed thickly and noticed Jasper look away quickly when he caught wind of the change in my emotions. Pure lust. I was thankful again that I could no longer blush and managed to play it off when I focused on what Edward was saying, instead of the electricity he was igniting underneath my frozen skin. "I won't let anything happen, Houston. It's actually pretty easy once you let your senses take over."

"That's what I'm afraid of." I muttered darkly and looked up at him with a sour twist contorting my mouth. "What if we find a human and I can't stop myself?"

"I'll be there." He nodded and kissed my lips quickly before I could offer up any kind of protest. I reacted a little too eagerly, my head tilting guiltily once again when he pulled away as quiet snickers floated in the air.

"Sorry." I muttered then glanced down at the flowy skirt of my dress. My feet were bare, of course, and I couldn't really see any change to the pigmentation of my exposed skin. But the differences were still there. My legs were flawlessly smooth and looked deceptively _strong_ as my calves molded into my knees, then my thighs; which were thankfully hidden underneath the whispy fold of silk. I looked over at Alice then and bit down unconsciously on my lower lip. "You going to hate me if I want to hunt in jeans and a tee shirt?"

At once, Alice looked extremely irritated and put out by my question. But after a couple of seconds, she shrugged and grinned brightly at me. "I'll just make you change as soon as you get home!" A peck to both of my cheeks pronounced her plans and I was even more fearful of her love for clothes now that my body could withstand actually being dressed for periods of time that lasted longer than minutes or hours. There was nothing stopping her now from eyeing me like some oversized Barbie doll. "But first!" She exclaimed and grabbed my wrist. I recoiled at once when she started to drag me after her, apologizing loudly and profusely when I caused her to stumble with my sudden jerk. Jasper made a move to separate us but Alice was quick to wave him off. "She didn't mean it." She nodded once then looked up at me with the same patience that had been in Edward's eyes shortly after I woke up. "I just want you to look in the mirror before you change."

My reflex reaction was a groan as my head fell back. "Aww Alice," I pouted and looked at her yet again, but when she started to lead me into the bathroom, I didn't stop her. "You know how much I hate looking into those things."

"Well, tough." She nodded once then another vibrant grin spread across her face as she stopped suddenly then spun me around. "Things change and you need a good mental image of yourself."

Another groan passed my lips as Edward, Jasper, and Carlisle joined us. The grin on Edward's face knocked me momentarily breathless and I struggled a little to keep my thoughts, and emotions, in check.

"Besides..." She shrugged and let me go before stepping around me so she could clearly see my face. "Edward promised that I could be here the first time since you sidestepped every single mirror at your wedding."

"Cancer!" I blurted out but stopped suddenly when movement in the mirror to my left caught my attention. I clenched my eyes shut out of sheer instinct, wincing minutely when the comforting grip of Edward's hand molded against my bare upper arm.

"You really should open your eyes." He breathed into my ear, forcing the overpowering surges of desire to attack me again. I had to work harder than I'd ever had to in my human days to push it all aside and grimaced as I counted backward from fifty in my head. I could do this. After all, the worst part of this entire situation was over. The fire of Edward's venom was long gone from my body, so why couldn't I just open my eyes and take in the effects of my new life? The life Edward had willingly given me.

With a resigned, yet determined sigh, I straightened up and wrenched my eyelids back to stare at myself for the first time in months.


	11. Chapter 11

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**__ Who knew listening to Tyler Hilton's music could be so inspiring?! Anyway, new chapter! Enjoy._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Eleven:**

"That's not me." I blurted out abruptly as my eyes darted over every single line and curve of the woman staring back at me. Her skin, of course, looked like it was made of marble, the light throwing a beautiful, yet erie glow over the alabaster surface. The skin was stretched taunt, yet gracefully over her cheekbones and jaw, highlighting the tiny curve of her nose, and pucker of pale pink lips. I refused to look into the eyes of my reflection, already knowing they would be red with lavender shadows darkening the skin underneath her long lashes. I couldn't bring myself to look into her eyes, _my eyes._

"Yes it is." Edward still sounded patient as he came to stand behind me once again. I caught every single move he made as he molded his body against mine. I could easily feel his chest against my back, his arms matching mine as they wound around my tiny waist. The reflection in front of me changed and I couldn't swallow back the gasp that hissed up my throat. I still wasn't used to see him, or my family, with my new eyes. The changes, though subtle, were still clearly defined and I began to wonder if I'd ever really seen the full perfection in his face before now. I probably hadn't, but now, being able to see him standing with me knocked me breathless.

"Nuhuh." I muttered, sounding completely distracted as I continued to stare at our reflections in the mirror. I'd always thought that we looked so unbalanced whenever we stood next to each other while I was still human. I was too plain, too ordinary to deserve someone like Edward. But now I was his equal in every single way and our reflections finally mirrored that. The woman standing in front of him was completely breath-taking and I couldn't help but start to wonder how our bodies would look. That seemed to break the floodgates and wave after wave of absolute want and need momentarily washed over me. But, with a sharp gasp, I betrayed myself and looked into the eyes of the woman staring back at me. Blood red irises bore into me mercilessly, even though the expression on the woman's face was complete bewilderment. Her eyes..._my_ eyes held me in such a powerful trance that it took Edward physically lifting my feet from the floor to pull me back to reality.

"Houston?" His tone was anxious as he set me back down in the bedroom and turned me bodily to face him. The others hovered anxiously around me, but only Alice seemed at ease with my new turn of emotions. Jasper was clearly on edge, internally warring with himself on whether or not to intervein.

I reigned my thoughts in and focused on Edward standing rigidily right in front of me. "Sorry." I breathed and looked up at him guiltily. "The eyes threw me."

His laugh was a mere breathless whisper as he pulled me against him and buried his lips in the crown of my hair. "I figured it would." He whispered into the strands and soothingly stroked my back. "They won't stay that way forever, I promise."

"I know." I started then frowned abruptly. "But...they're so _red_."

A collective chorus of laughter floated around us and I instantly whimpered and hid my face in Edward's chest. "I hate you all." I muttered darkly then sighed and straightened up to face him. "Okay, let's get this show on the road." I squared my shoulders and turned to face our family before Edward could completely command my attention yet again. "Who's going on the first hunt so they can laugh at me for being the only clutzy vampire in existance?"

It was eventually decided that Emmett, Esme, Jasper, and Rosalie would accompany us on my first hunting trip. Alice kept her grimaces to a minimum when I exchanged the silk dress for a pair of sturdy, dark-washed jeans and a black thermal top. My feet were finally covered in brand new sneakers and I breathed in a deep breath reflexively as I emerged from the bathroom, pulling my hair up into a high ponytail. It had surprised me when I first examined my hair, forever grown to the bottom of my ribcage. It looked shiny and healthy as it hung down my back, not nearly as dry and damaged as I'd once feared. Apparently this new life was going to make up for every single thing I'd gone through as a human.

Fear gripped me tightly as I trooped downstairs at Edward's side. They didn't have to slow their pace to match mine, I could keep up effortlessly as we crossed the house to the first level back door. That thrilled me a little, but I kept my new source of strength as tightly coiled as I could. I wanted to blend in with my family, not stand out as the uncontrollable newborn.

"I don't know how you're doing it." Jasper whispered when we somehow became separated from the group. I blinked in surprise and looked up at him, stunned silent as I worked frantically to figure out what he was referring to. He grinned wryly at me and I still couldn't get over how different he looked to me now. All of the scars from his first years as a vampire shown brilliantly against his skin. But he didn't look disgusting in any way, if anything, he looked even more dangerous than he had origianlly. Like I'd _needed_ even more of a reason to be afraid of him! "You're more controlled than any newborn I've ever come across."

"Thanks." I beamed at him brightly then felt the expression dim on my face. "I think."

He laughed at that and shook his head as Alice flittered to his side. She winked at me and I gulped in an unnecessary breath and returned to Edward's side. "Let's do this." I muttered and slid my hand into his, forcing myself to be careful as I laced my fingers through his. This was definitely going to take some getting used to.

"Just let your instincts take over. Don't be afraid of anything, I'm not leaving your side for a second."

I nodded, still holding my breath as we started out across the dark backyard. The sun hadn't even begun to rise yet, but I knew it was only a matter of time. The changes in the air were very subtle, but easy for my new nose to detect. I bristled at once and dug my heels into the ground when we reached the wide river that lined the back of the property. How was I going to get over that?!

"It's very simple." Edward announced then suddenly winked at me. He dropped my hand and took two large steps back. I watched breathlessly as his long legs broke into an easy stride. His foot hit a wide, nearly-flat boulder in the bank of the river and vaulted himself over. He disappeared almost instantly in the fringe of trees on the other side of the river and I shook my head slowly in disbelief. There definitely weren't anymore secrets between us now.

"I totally can't do that." I huffed, my eyes rolling in their sockets when Emmett snickered behind me. That seemed to spur me on, my resolve strengthening as I took two wide steps to the side then scooted back like Edward had done. Now that I had Emmett's laugh antagonizing me, I didn't think what Edward'd done looked all that difficult. The physical stuff was the most basic, I just had to keep reminding myself of that as I launched myself toward the riverbank. I nearly started laughing when I stepped onto the same rock Edward had stepped on and pushed off with no real thought into how much strength I was using. I'd given absolutely no thought to the trees I was launching myself into, but I forced that away when I noticed a branch coming closer and closer.

I didn't hold back as I reached out for the branch, laughing loudly when my body began to swing effortlessly through the air. I didn't even bother to look down and all too soon, my feet hit the ground with the tiniest of thuds. It just sounded like someone closing a door quietly behind them.

"Houston?" Edward's anxious voice found me before his eyes did. I was still laughing when he came into my line of vision, Emmett, Esme, Jasper, and Rosalie trailing him.

"Hi." I grinned and slapped my dirty hands against the thighs of my jeans. Alice had never really given clothes much thought before, I'd never seen anyone in my family wear the same thing twice. So I wasn't going to give my clothes much thought either. I'd just have to remember to bribe Alice into stocking my closet with more jeans. "How'd I do?"

The look on Edward's face was clear amusement, and awe; Emmett just looked downright irritated when he stopped in front of me. Served him right! I spared a second to jokingly stick my tongue out at him then looked up at my husband eagerly. He still looked amused, but as he continued to stare at me, he seemed to become more in awe with me. "Do you have any idea how far you launched yourself, Houston?"

I debated for a second then just shrugged. "I got over the river, but that's all I know."

"You outjumped me." He laughed and quickly pulled me to him for a hug. I laughed again and buried my face in his chest, kissing the front of his shirt before pulling away. New scents were starting to premate the air and I could smell not only the comforting perfume of my family members, but I could also smell the moss, trees, and various other greenery surrounding us. My eyes darted around to take everything in, no detail going unnoticed as other scents filled my nose. Out of the new aromas, one really stood out. It wasn't as mouthwatering as some of the other scents, but my mind unconsciously honed in on it as I tried to figure out exactly where it was coming from.

"What is that?" I murmered, afraid that my ringing voice would suddenly startle everything I was trying to quickly take in.

"I was wondering if you would catch that." Edward's voice mimiced mine and he unconsciously leaned closer toward me. "Do you know where it's coming from?"

I bit down on my cold, impenetrable lip and started to look around again. I couldn't answer him, which was weird and a little unsettling. Knowing full well that he could keep up, I only answered by streaking off through the trees. I did exactly as he'd suggested, letting my senses guide me as I pushed my body toward the source of the scent that had intruded on my thoughts. The trees crowded around me comfortingly, reminding me of the dim memories I had when Edward would run through the same scene with me on his back. I'd wondered how he could have run so effortlessly through the forest without the fear of running into anything. Now that I was the one running through full speed, I understood completely. There was so much space in my mind to take everything in and think about everything else. I reached the source of the scent all too soon, stopping easily before I fully emerged in the wide space. A small group of deer stood grazing in the open space, looking completely at ease. I barely noticed Edward when he came up beside me, my entire focus on the animals in front of me.

I had to admit that the smell of their blood pounding vibrantly in their veins wasn't the most appealing thing I could have ever smelled. But there was a tingle to their melodic pulse. The fire in my throat ignited powerfully and a low growl easily built up in my chest.

"Don't think about it." A chill tore through me at Edward's whispered words of encouragement and, just as he'd mentioned, I didn't. There was absolutely no thought or second guess when my body slid into a predatory crouch. It took literally no thought at all as I pounced on the closest deer, easily overpowering him as I hurled us both to the ground. The power of my thirst completely overtook me then and I wasted no time in burying my new, razor-sharp teeth into the skin covering the exact point of pressure. Blood filled my mouth instantly and I drank greedily.

Everyone was watching me when I drained the deer and climbed to my feet. My hands and the knees of my jeans were caked in dirt, the blood I'd gotten on my shirt all but invisible thanks to the dark color. But I could only imagine how I looked to my audience.

"What?" I muttered, knowing they could easily hear me and wiped my hands on the thighs of my jeans. Edward's expression surprised me the most, awed amusement once again contorting his features as he kicked aside his own prey and smoothly glided over to me.

"That was..." He trailed off with a small shake of his head and pulled me up against him. I wound an arm around his waist and looked down at the corpse of my first victim. "I honestly didn't know what to expect when I saw you hunt for the first time."

"Did I do okay?" I wondered aloud, looking up at him curiously as the others joined us. All traces of humor were wiped clean from Emmett's features and I felt a smug thrill of victory at that.

"Better than okay." Edward appraised and kissed my temple then stepped back. "Are you still thirsty?"

I took an internal inventory and nodded instantly. "Are there anymore around?"

"See for yourself." He goaded, a bright grin on his face as he completely let me go so that I could concentrate. Hmm, guess he'd already noticed that he was still my biggest distraction. I had to concentrate now, but luck seemed to be on my side when I caught a scent that was more familiar to me now.

In no time at all, this time the prey being elk, more blood flowed down my throat and when I stood for the last time, I felt almost sloshy. The ache in my throat was now the dull tickle it'd been when I woke up and I wasn't as fearful of my new life as I'd once been. We all reassembled and Esme grinned warmly at me as she stood on one side, Edward on my other.

"Have you had enough?" She asked in her flawless voice, coiling an arm around me as she waited for my answer.

Thinking about it for a minute, I nodded then reached out and slid my hand into Edward's. It was a little tough to be so reigned in with my strength after letting it flow through me with no restraints. But the switch was easier now than it'd been before. Another thing that threw me slightly. "Let's go home."

Everyone began to move at once with my declaration, Edward easily falling into step beside me as we ran through the woods toward the house. We were halfway home when a new, completely unfamiliar scent assaulted my senses and concentration. I couldn't think as I broke from my family abruptly and tore through the greenery toward the source. I had no idea what smelled so intoxicating to me, all I knew was that I had to have whatever was causing this delicious aroma.

"No!" A primal snarl ripped through the air directly behind me and my legs pumped even more furiously to put more distance between me and the sound. It was illogical, of course, and had I been able to think clearly, I would've known exactly what was going on. But I couldn't think or even let myself register everything going on around me. One second I was racing toward that inviting scent and the next, I was being hurled to the ground with a sickening thud.


	12. Chapter 12

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__Another chapter! Sorry I'm getting a little slow with chapters now. I keep changing my mind about what I want to do or not do with this story. Anyway, here's another one! Enjoy._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Twelve:**

"Let me go!" I screeched, thrashing violently against the forest floor. Emmett had been the one to tackle me when I tore off in a new direction, but the monster I'd always feared roared to life behind my eyes and threw back all the barriers I'd put into place. I easily flipped from my stomach to my back and kicked both legs up. I didn't wait to see where my largest brother landed, only hearing the deafening crack of a nearby tree as I jumped to my feet and began to run again.

"Houston, no!" This time, Edward's voice rang dimly through my ears as my muscles pushed me forward, a small voice in the back of my mind urging me on. This voice, one I'd never heard before but knew it belonged to the new monster sharing my body, practically crooned in my ears and drowned out Edward's melodic tone. _He can't stop us, just keep _running._ It'll be completely worth it._

An inner war began to rage in my mind. I could form more coherent thoughts, but that didn't mean I was able to stop my body from moving toward the enticing aroma. I tried to slow down, to force muscles back under my control and stop my feet. When that didn't work, I began to hope against hope that Edward would catch me before I did something I knew I would regret.

Edward overpowered my wavering strength and grabbed me. A feral snarl ripped through my throat as our bodies collided like two rocks in a landslide, throwing us both off balance and into the nearest fringe of trees. It didn't hurt when I bounced off the closest trunk, my body easily twirling away from my husband's grasp. I landed in a crouch with my lips pulled back over my teeth. Edward slipped into his own crouch in front of me, one hand half extended toward me while the other balled tightly into a fist. As soon as I saw the defensive posture and primal grimace covering his beautiful face, a breeze blew around us and completely wiped the scent I'd been chasing from my nostrils. It was brief, but I was able to completely regain my frame of mind and straightened up at once. Seeing his muscles tightly coiled, his hand clenched tightly closed against his thigh reminding me of the first time he'd ever looked at me sent a spasm of pain through me and made it so much easier for me to forget about the thing I'd just been chasing.

"I'm so sorry." I breathed, my voice barely above a whisper but weighed down with sudden grief. I'd fought two members of my family for something they'd sworn to protect me from. It was a relief to know that they were living up to that promise, but I couldn't completely escape the guilt tugging at a large corner of my mind. I'd almost killed an innocent person.

"It's okay." Edward still sounded a little formal as he relaxed too and pulled me gently, carefully toward him. I curled against him instantly and hid my face in his chest as I cut off oxygen to my lungs. I was terrified now of that scent finding me again, of losing control and hurting my family even more than I'd already had.

"No it's not." I muttered, shaking my head pathetically against his shirt. I kissed the smooth skin underneath the fabric then gently pushed away from him. "I'm just gonna run, okay? I...need to get away from that scent." I nodded slowly, averting my eyes from his then lightly squeezed his hand as I stepped away. "I'll go straight home, I promise."

I looked up at him long enough to smile before I turned and took off. The wind once again began to whip through my hair, which had pretty much broken free from the messy ponytail I'd created back at the house. I could hear footsteps echoing behind me, knowing that it was someone in my family, but I paid them no mind. Even if I dared to let myself breathe, I knew it wouldn't be Edward. I could already sense the differences in my family's footsteps and figured it was probably Esme or Jasper trailing behind me. I kept air secured in my lungs as I pushed myself faster, letting the endless strength flow through me unobstructed. It felt good to stretch my muscles, to work them so freely after so long of being held back. I wasn't held back anymore and it felt intoxicating. Like some new drug had just been given to me in an endless supply. There were no limitations now to what I could do and my love for Edward, for the promise and the gift he'd given me, swirled powerfully in my still heart.

The emotions and feelings I'd felt for him when I was human were nothing compared to what I felt now. There had been countless times, always in the dark of night when sleep evaded me, that I feared I would physically break under the strain of my emotions for him. How could one person feel so much for another and still be able to withstand it all? Was it even possible to keep it all reigned in where it could only continue to grow? Now I knew the answer to that question. My love for Edward had grown, but my body had grown as well. I could put everything I felt, minus the one emotion I'd thought would be lost to me for some time, in it's proper place. I was strong enough now to love and be loved by my husband. All because he had loved me enough to make the ultimate sacrifice in what he believed in.

Everything I'd told him during my days as a human in his world were the truth. I didn't feel very different in this new body. My worst of fears hadn't come true after all. I still felt like me, like Houston, but now in more control of the physical part of my life. My mannerisms, thoughts, and emotions were still my own. My personality didn't do the complete 180 that I'd feared it would. Essentially, I was still the same person I'd been before Edward's venom poisoned my system. The only difference now was that I was no longer trapped on the brink of death. It felt like I still had my soul.

Through the wide barrage of trees, I sighed happily when the familiar scents of my family wafted around me. The house wasn't too far ahead, I could tell now. But just as I was about to break through the forest, a new scent filled my nose. My throat began to burn violently, forcing me to jerk to a stop as I inhaled a rather powerful amount of the air around me. Something was different about the house now, than when we'd left this morning. Someone new had found us.

Whoever it was had a heartbeat.

Jasper was the first one to reach me, reminding me belatedly that he'd been the one following me when I'd needed to run to fully clear my senses. "Houston?" He asked, his bass voice lower than I'd ever heard it sound before.

"Not breathing." I muttered, using some of the oxygen I'd stored in my lungs to respond. A wave of calm hit me suddenly and for once, I didn't fight against it. I would need whatever I could get for the possibilities of what was waiting on the front porch. I could hear the slightly anxious thud of a pulse, no amount of distance could dim that sound in my hearing.

I didn't look over when the rest of the family caught up with us, Edward sliding his fingers through mine deftly as he took his familiar inventory on the new visitor. A low growl filtered through his throat, causing me to flinch. I'd hear that growl for the rest of eternity and never get entirely used to such a menacing sound emit from my husband's body.

"What is it?" I muttered, using a few more puffs of air before completely falling silent. I'd have to respond physically now to save my breath.

"Your biological father's finally found where you live."

* * *

"I can't _believe_ this!" Edward growled with a quick shake of his head. He was motionless beside me, resembling the statue from my human memories.

"Why is he here?" I whispered, no longer needing to hold my breath. We'd moved into the house, Edward sneaking me upstairs to our redone room so that I wouldn't come in contact with Michael.

"I don't know." He sighed and it sounded more like a groan of dispair than anger. My arms locked tigher against my chest as I watched him move, his human facade overpowering his features as he crashed onto the bed I'd woken up on. I stayed where I was for a few minutes then silently ghosted across the room to stand in front of him. He sat up instantly and locked his hands on my hips. I was still surprised by the restraint he no longer needed with me now. I was nowhere near as fragile as I'd once been.

"What all happened while I was burning?" I asked, not thinking about my choice of words as I lazily looped my arms around his neck. Jasper's calming affect had nothing on Edward's ability to calm me with the simplest of touches. "No lying or half-truths here, Edward. I need to know what I missed."

A heavy sigh resonated between us as he pulled me into his lap. I didn't waste time in curling against him. Even though we could both stand for the rest of eternity without pain or discomfort, it was still nice to indulge in the past of our relationship and just curl into his comforting embrace. "Alice found the obituary that you wrote up. It was printed in the paper the day after your heart stopped. The entire town of Forks thinks you're dead, Houston."

"You got a glimpse into his mind, didn't you?" I whispered, not able to bring my voice much higher out of fear that unwanted ears would pick up on it. If he was right, there was no way possible that Michael could know I still wandered through my own home.

"I did." He nodded and his arms tightened around me a little more. "He came here for proof that you're dead. And I'm pretty sure that he's not going to let us just say your body was shipped to Texas for burial. He's looking for confirmation."

A low groan filtered past my lips as I buried my face in his neck. He no longer felt cold to me, our skins were the perfect temperature. "What do we do?"

"We could go away for a while." Edward offered quietly, his voice causing a small shiver to spiral through my spine. I looked up, temporarily rendered speechless with my mouth gaping open slightly. I could only guess how I looked right then, but something about my expression prompted him to go on, the lines of his face stressed with anxiety and worry. "We never did have an official honeymoon."

"But I liked our honeymoon!" I interjected quickly. Isle Esme had been the most beautiful place I could've ever envisioned. Half of it was because Edward had been with me, but honestly, I couldn't have thought of a better vacation spot.

"I know you did." He smiled at me patiently and kissed my lips before he pulled back to go on. "We can always go back to the island. I'm sure Esme won't mind. It would take you out of harm's way..."

"But leave our family to get rid of Michael." I couldn't silence this new interjection, my voice dropping back into the whisper it'd once been.

"Houston, there's no way that you can help with this! We talked about every single possibility. Of course, we just anticipated Margie coming to say her goodbyes over your body, but you're not ready for that yet. I can't ask you to lay perfectly still while she cries and mourns over you. It's more temptation and stress than I'm ever going to be willing to put on your shoulders."

Abruptly, the memory of how my first hunt had ended filled my mind and I knew I couldn't argue with his logic. Even though I could surpress the intense burn coating my throat, I would crumble so absolutely in the temptation of human blood right in front of me. Sighing again, I let my temple fall against Edward's shoulder, absently taking a mental note that he no longer felt like he was made to marble to me anymore. My body conformed more accurately against his now. A flash of desire pulsed through me, forcing me to fight it off in vain. My control was being tested in more ways than one at the moment. "So you're suggesting we go back to Isle Esme for a little while. Do you think I can handle the traveling?"

"I have no doubt that you can." He agreed with absolutely no hesitation in his voice. He was already plotting, I could tell.

Leaning up, I just eyed him skeptically for a second before a small smile creased my perfect lips. "I...guess we could do that."

My husband's answering grin was practically blinding, the perfect little half-smile on his lips was my most favorite. And he knew that. Leave it to Edward to pull out all the stops when it came to trying to convince me to follow his plans.


	13. Chapter 13

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__Just a warning, the chapters are going to start getting a little more steamy. This chapter's rated M for conversations and word usage._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen:**

As soon as Michael left the house, Carlisle called a family meeting. This was the first one that I could actually attend and I was sure that, if the action were possible, butterflies had been let loose in my stomach. Well, not so much butterflies as giant moths. Whatever awaited us was not settling nicely in my new stomach.

I held my breath instinctively, a reflex from my human days, as I slid into one of the chairs at the large dining room table. A table we only used in moments like this. I hadn't even been required to eat here back when I needed human food to sustain me. Edward sat in the chair to my right, probably to make me more comfortable with the gestures that still commanded my body from time to time. It was sometimes difficult, probably because all of this was still insanely new, to remember that I was now a vampire. Just like each member of my family.

Carlisle sat calmly on my left and once the entire family had been assembled, he launched into the reason why we'd all been brought together. "Alice doesn't see Houston's biological father going away easily."

The way he worded his first statement sent a chill down my spine and I flinched. I hated the thought of this man having once been genetically bound to me. As far as I was concerned now, Carlisle was my father. His venom had created Edward and Edward had created me. "Please don't call him that." I couldn't help myself or stop the words from filtering past my lips as I stared intently at the glossy table top. Fingers instinctively curled around mine and I didn't have to look up to know that the hand belonged to Edward. Always trying to ease my fears. He was just as perfect at that as he was in everything else he did.

"I'm sorry." Carlisle apologized quietly with a small incline of his head. I nodded my thanks and squeezed Edward's hand, feeling like my spine had been replaced with a steel rod. "But I think we can all agree that Houston cannot be seen by anyone outside this house."

"So what're we going to do?" Jasper asked, the quiet thumping of his voice surprising me. I didn't think he'd be the one to ask the questions I already knew the answers to.

"We can't give the man what he wants, that's also obvious." Carlisle sighed and the uncomfortable knot in my stomach tightened. "Houston's not ready to lie still and I don't want to ask her to put herself on display. Or in danger."

"So the only logical choice is for me to leave." I muttered and blinked in surprise when the words whooshed quietly past my lips. I hadn't even thought to add Edward into the equation. A sudden thought seized me then, would it look too shady if Edward were to leave town, to leave his _family_, so soon after my supposed death? Would it make sense for him to be here one day, then just two days later, be gone? I could feel the beginnings of a phantom headache building behind my eyes and I reached up reflexively with one hand to rub the stress away. My left hand was still trapped in my husband's tight grip.

"For _us_ to leave." Edward replied quietly, yet decisively as he gave my hand a light squeeze under the table. My eyebrows creased even more suddenly, when I didn't feel a familiar pressure between my fingers. No one really seemed to be paying attention to me, except for the always-observant Edward, as I pulled my hand from his grip to inspect my left hand. A small gasp slipped past my lips when I saw that not only was my wedding ring gone, but my engagement ring was also absent.

I could feel the scowl stressing certain lines in my face, mainly around my eyes and lips; but was momentarily thrown off balance when Alice chirped in. "It makes sense. Houston's supposed to be in Texas by now and I can't really see anyone blaming Edward for escaping."

"To get away from the memories of his dead wife." I muttered humorlessly, following my words with a bitter laugh as I carefully pushed away from the table and paced away from the table a couple of steps. Once again, a flood of calm threatened to pull my muscles loose but I fought against it, not being able to help the small, warning growl that was aimed at Jasper. I didn't want to feel anything but what I was right then. I had to get a grip on my moodswings myself. How else was I going to be able to be in complete control when it was just me and Edward?

It was a little scary to think about that, to envision myself with my husband without the help of our family to restrain me if I did anything bad. The thought of hurting Edward made me flinch and he was at my side in the blink of an eye, one arm coiling around my waist as his other hand clapped over my shoulder. "Houston," His voice was quiet and velvety in my ear as his hand glided down my arm, then back up to my shoulder. "Talk to me."

"What do you want me to say?" I croaked, wincing when my voice betrayed me and cracked. I hated showing weakness even more now than ever before. I wasn't supposed to be weak anymore, but yet I was. And always with Edward. I couldn't bring myself to turn my head the quarter centimeter it would take to be staring into his eyes, which I was sure were burning with his anxious curiosity. My ultimate undoing. My husband didn't fight fair, that much was blatantly obvious to any outsider.

Even though I wasn't actually looking at him, I could still feel the shifts in the air when he turned to quietly address our family. There were no longer any secrets so I knew what he was planning as if he'd been in a loud, crowded room having to scream at them. I didn't resist when he pulled me out of the room with him, neither of our footsteps stopping until we were outside. Taking a deep breath, I held it and just looked up at Edward pitifully once he'd situated me in front of him. "Talk to me, please."

I hated hearing the strain in his voice, knowing that keeping my thoughts from him always left him uneasy and overly anxious. He was too used to knowing every single thing a person was thinking. I was still, clearly, the exception to this rule. "I'm scared." I replied quietly, yet simply as my shoulders lifted into a small shrug before falling back into place against my body. Why lie? It never did any good and he would be able to see right through me anyway.

"What're you scared about?" Just because I was unwilling to lie didn't mean that he wasn't going to have to drag the truth out of me.

"Of being alone with you!" I squeaked then cursed under my breath and pivoted away from him.

I didn't get very far though, Edward's hands closed around my arms quickly and I was suddenly being flattened against his body. There was a brief, fleeting urge to pull away; but the memories from almost attacking him while hunting were waiting to squelch that urge. I couldn't show any kind of violence against him anymore. Not after this morning. "Why are you afraid to be alone with me, Houston? Whole story, please. I'm not above begging you right now."

A resigned sigh passed my lips before I could start to form words on the tip of my tongue. And as soon as that first word appeared, the rest came tumbling out after. "I can't control myself the way everyone thinks I can. I have all these urges, most of which would probably get me in trouble if you actually _could_ see in my head! And I'm separating you from your...our family! I hate this, I hate the entire situation. I hate that you're all having to act like this grieving family when I'm not even dead! I know what I was signing up for, Edward. And believe me when I say that I haven't changed my mind. I just hate how hard this is on _you_! I'll never be able to think of myself before thinking of you. But I honestly did not expect Michael to come here, wanting my body on display so that he can pump you for money. And that's all he wants. He doesn't want to mourn me, he doesn't want any of that!" The words were as much of a surprise to me as they were to Edward. And as my thoughts joined together, everything clicked into place. Michael Sherwood hadn't changed one bit from the man my mother had left seventeen years ago. He would always have ulterior motives.

Edward didn't relax when my rant lost steam. It was almost as if he could tell that something else was coming. More words bubbling on the very tip of my tongue, just waiting for their explosion into sound. "You know why he's here, don't you?"

"Of course I do." I muttered hollowly and looked up at him blankly. "I'm surprised you didn't see it when you read his mind. He hasn't changed from the man my mother described when she actually let herself talk about him. If he's here for any reason, it's probably to nail the Cullens with my death. He wants a payoff, that much I learned while I was still human and doing my dialysis at the hospital. He even mentioned it in front of Esme! He wanted her to put a monetary amount on how badly we wanted him to disappear. Now?" I shrugged again and could feel my face, as well as Edward's hands, tighten in anger. "Now I'm dead. What better way to get paid than try to prove that my death wasn't of natural causes?"

* * *

I was hiding. Again. This time, I didn't hide in the house. Michael had shown up uninvited and it was just too tempting to kill him. Not because of some exotically powerful scent of his blood, it was sheer anger and hatred fueling the desire this time. I didn't want to drink his blood, to take some part of him into my body. I wanted to tear him to shreds, to rip him limb from limb and rejoice as every single bone in his body cracked under my strength.

I'd envisioned it several times in my head, but every so often, I didn't get too far. Jasper, now always on the fringes of my shadow, would assault me with his gift and I would get distracted enough to fight him off, instead of enjoying my daydreams. And I was still so tightly wound that I couldn't even think of being with Edward the way my body forcefully craved. It was getting exceedingly more difficult to keep him at bay, now that there was no longer a fear of me being hurt by us consumating our marriage.

Ha. What a way to phrase wanting to molest my husband.

Shaking my head slightly, I just sighed and tossed another pebble carefully into the river that separated the forest from the backyard. I couldn't even go into my own house! That was how deep my hatred of the man that had helped create my human body ran. I still didn't see myself as genetically bound to him. My DNA now contained vampire venom, venom that had been generated in the body of my husband, and our father before him.

It was probably a twisted way to think of things, but that seemed to help the seconds tick by. Edward was needed in the house, to play the grieving husband laying the groundwork for disappearing on an extended holiday. But I wasn't in the outskirts of the house alone. Alice had come out with me this time, needing no close proximity to see the decisions being made inside the house.

She sat quietly beside me, humming some tune she'd gotten stuck in her head as she let me have my moment to think.

Finally the silence became too much and I huffed loudly. "How long is he gonna be here?"

"Just a few more minutes." Alice replied quietly, hating my exile just as much as I did.

"Do you really see me and Edward leaving?" My voice grew quieter with my new question, and new line of thought.

"I do." She nodded and tilted her perfect little face toward me. "And I can see you worrying needlessly. Edward loves the idea of being able to be alone with you. And I think going to Esme's island is just what you two need. We all got time to ourselves. Emmett and Rosalie had at least a decade before they concsciously tried to control themselves around the rest of us."

"But you and Jasper?" I asked, raising a perfectly arched eyebrow with a small smile tugging at my lips. This was something I'd been thinking about lately. Not so much the love lives of my family. Just...how it was all different now. I was no longer human, Edward hadn't been human in a very long time. It was still amusing to think that we were still virgins. Especially Edward, who had spent over a century in celibacy tacked onto his human years.

"Jasper and I are different." She mused, her tiny eyebrows wrinkling together as she thought about what she was going to say next. But I had to succumb to the quiet 'aha' that filtered past my lips when a new smile transformed her face. "We did have our moments though."

"All I needed to know!" I laughed out and raised my hands in mock-surrender. I didn't really want to think about various members of my vampiric family getting it on. I grew quiet after a few minutes then sighed as another question, probably one Alice saw coming, formed in my mind. "Was it scary? You giving yourself up like that to Jasper? I mean, I know it's all basically still the same but isn't it...I dunno, more powerful as a vampire?"

"The emotions are." She nodded and looked back down at the water stretched in front of our feet. "But I also never experienced that in my human life. I was very much like you were when you died. Jasper was the first person I ever had sex with, but it wasn't scary for me to let it happen."

"But you also weren't newborns." I muttered, suddenly feeling a dark cloud hanging over my head when I remembered that little tidbit. Alice and Jasper hadn't had to worry about hurting each other while in the throws of passion.

Alice snickered in her bell-like voice and shook her head as she looked at me again. "No, but you also can't hurt Edward the way you might think. You might just...make him very uncomfortable if things get too far out of hand."

"Which they probably would." I mused again, quietly, then snorted just as quietly as I moved to lean back on my hands. "I can't believe we're having this conversation."

"Yeah," She agreed with a quiet laugh of her own. "Two human virgins talking about vampires having sex."


	14. Chapter 14

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__Another chapter rated M for langugage and sensual situations._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own the original characters. No copyright or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen:**

It was all set. The trip to Esme's island was happening and I had absolutely no objections.

Michael's visits to the house were becoming more frequent, which meant that I had to disappear more and more. In my anger and hatred, I'd become all but immune to the scent of his blood. I already wanted to kill him, I'd argued, so what was the point in me leaving the house?

In fact, he was still there. I could hear his voice clearly through the two levels separating us. I tried to block it out though, grinding my teeth together as I stared helplessly at the mound of clothes Alice had laid out for me. My entire human wardrobe had been thrown away to get rid of my human scent. And Alice hadn't disappointed when she replentished my clothes. The closet in Edward's and my bedroom barely managed to fit the clothes she'd given _him_ and as a result, my clothes were being stored in the vacant room right next to ours. Probably a good thing if Michael got nosey and tried to snoop around my bedroom. He wouldn't find any human artifacts of my existance. Just the framed wedding photo that Esme had all but glued to the wall, along with my diploma, which hung right beside Edward's with my maiden name still embossed on the thick parchment. The walls were still shrouded in dark gold fabric, the carpet a shade lighter. But there were more things that had interested me in the space. A couple of posters baring the names of my favorite bands had been framed and put up, and the bed I'd woken up on was still situated right in front of the glass wall. The couch was pushed all the way back against its wall, but the stereo had been shoved underneath the shelves of CDs that now contained my and Edward's music. The room looked much more lived in than it had when I first came into the Cullens' lives. Just by looking around, I could see the influence my human self'd had on my vampire. This room was now as much mine as it had been his. He'd given that to me while I burned.

I heard a quiet sigh come from the door and looked over my shoulder to see Edward smiling sadly at me. His face was still strained with fabricated grief, but smoothed out by the time I crossed the room and threw my arms around him, not bothering to sound discreet as I closed the door behind him.

"How bad was it?" I asked, hiding my face in his neck as I kissed the exposed skin of his collarbone. He was dressed much simpler now than he did when it was just us. He really seemed to be laying it on thick with this new role. After all, how many grieving husbands looked so put together? That had grated Alice's nerves a bit, seeing Edward's clothes disheveled, rumpled, and horribly simplistic. But she knew it was for a greater reason. My existance was at stake. Literally.

"Bad." He sighed and kissed my temple before leading us away from the door. I groaned almost mutely when I was facing the stacks of clothes again and promptly turned my back on it. I wasn't in the mood to pack, even though I would need to be ready. We were set to leave right after Michael left and I hadn't even _begun_ to pack yet.

"What'd he say?" I asked, finally extricating myself from him so I could blindly shove clothes into the bag that had been laid out for me.

"He blames me for your death." Edward sighed and dropped down on the edge of the bed, looking perfectly at ease seeing me so domesticated.

I grimaced at his words, my hands tightening into fists before I remembered that I was holding one of Edward's button down shirts. Not wanting to ruin it, I just set it aside then stepped in front of him. His arms wound easily around my waist, pulling me closer as I laid one hand on his shoulder and the other against the back of his neck. "You better not be taking anything he says to heart."

"But it's true." He replied then grinned up at me conspiritously. "I did, after all, kill you."

"Be serious." I groaned and moved to twist away from him. I wasn't fast enough, probably because I wasn't even trying, and instead of moving _away_ from Edward, I was being pulled into his lap. Straddling his thighs, I just huffed and stuck my tongue out childishly at him.

A purely evil grin transformed his features as he leaned up and nipped at my exposed tongue, then sighed as he relaxed and began to rub my sides. The cotton of my tee shirt moved with his fingers and temporarily distracted me before a low groan filled his throat. "I can't wait to be alone with you again, Houston."

"I can't either." I replied quietly, staring helplessly into his eyes as I reached up and ran the hand that had been clapped against the back of his neck, through his unruly bronze hair. "It's getting tougher for me to remember why I can't just jump you."

His laughter was pure honey and made me feel like my insides were turning to jelly. "All in due time, my love. I promise, pretty soon you will have me all to yourself. And then you can act on every single desire you've been repressing."

A huff resonated without my consent, but it ringed in falseness. "Jasper _so_ told on me, didn't he?"

"He did." Edward laughed with a small incline of his head, clearly amused by the joke of all this. "He told me, in confidence, that he's never seen a more horny newborn in his entire life."

"Well he should try to resist someone like you for the past year and half and see how well he does!" I bridled, my fingers tightening in his hair before I remembered where I was sitting. But before I could force myself back under control, Edward took the chore right out of my hands. His lips were on mine before I could even get my fingers to relax their grip in his hair. A low moan built in my chest as my lips crashed against his. They no longer conformed to the shape of Edward's. They held their own shape now, but felt surprisingly soft against his. I didn't let myself think about that as the kiss deepened for the very first time. I could feel his lips part against mine and wasted no time in my next series of actions. My hand tightened ever so slightly in his hair as my tongue slid past his lips. My back arched and pushed my chest into Edward's as my senses went into frantic overdrive. I could actually _taste_ him now, and kissing him with no worries was better than I could've ever imagined. Instantly, I wanted more. To feel the satin of his skin underneath my new fingertips, to feel his hands explore the new, frozen curves of my body that had been concealed since I woke up the last time.

I couldn't think as an uncomfortable sensation started vibrating in my chest, dimly aware that my lungs were only pretending to ache for oxygen. I didn't need to breathe anymore, and neither did Edward. We could kiss one another until someone pulled away. That inspired me, spurring me on as my arm slid under his then molded against the side of his body, up to his shoulderblade. Our lips moved a little more frantically against one another and my hips rolled into his as I strained to taste as much of him as I could. His own thoughts seemed to be on the same wavelength as mine, his fingers forcing my back to arch even more, which just pushed me into the curve of his body even more. He was everywhere, his fingers burning through the thin fabric of my shirt, his chest rumbling against mine with held-in growls, his tongue dueling mine for space in my mouth. And most importantly, I could easily feel his arrousal against the inside of my right thigh. The rest of the world didn't matter right then as I whimpered and began to grind my hips into his mercilessly.

A growl finally made it up to his throat and vibrated it's way between our lips, making me shiver in response. His fingers became fists against my back, keeping me even more secured as I tormented us both with the motion of my lower body. He finally pulled away from me then, both of us panting for air with his hands holding my face a couple inches from his. "You're going to be the death of me, Houston Cullen."

"Good thing we're both indestructable." I breathed, smiling dizzily at him before a new sound brought me out of my little reviere. Someone was coming. That had been why Edward finally pulled away from me. "Who?" I barely got the question out before I was being picked up and set back on my feet. I huffed but resigned myself when Carlisle suddenly opened the door and swept into the room. I blinked in surprise when the door closed shut behind him.

"I'm sorry to interrupt." He started, looking very uncomfortable when he saw the expressions on our faces. "Michael is trying to come up here. He wants to see the room Houston supposedly died in."

"What, he wants me to recreate it for him?!" I bit out, swearing fluently in my mind at the man downstairs, keeping me from enjoying new experiences with my husband.

Carlisle chuckled in spite of himself and squeezed my arm before returning his attention to Edward. "I've told him that you won't allow anyone else up here, but he isn't buying it. If you two want to make your...destination on time, I need you to come convince him yourself."

"I don't want him up here anyway." Edward frowned and once again looked like the vampire I'd always been slightly fearful of. "He'll probably try to steal something and use it against us."

"More than likely." I muttered before Carlisle could then held my hands up innocently as I turned to face my husband. "I'll be as quiet as I possibly can in case he makes it to the landing. But just give me some warning in case he bursts into the room?"

"He won't." Edward promised then leaned forward and kissed me quickly, a familiar sparkle in his butterscotch eyes. "Now get back to packing." Winking at me, I just grinned and successfully rolled my eyes before what I saw next lurched my stomach. I'd never seen his eyes the way I did just a split second before he turned away from me and strode from the room. His eyes, beautiful pools of liquid gold turned flat and solid with no warning. Eyes that I would never want to look into if I could possibly help it. Those were the eyes of a man who no longer had anything to live for. A man who had lost every single thing that cemented him to reality in one shot.

I did as I'd promised, moving deceptively quiet as I began to blindly shove clothes into the large duffel that had been given to me as a present by Esme. Carlisle had also left the room when Edward did, acting as moral support for his grieving son. I bit my lip to keep from cussing violently at the top of my voice. It would do no good to give myself away, even though the thought of just letting it all out vocal felt damn near heavenly.

Instead, as I stood there waiting for my husband's return, I thought about unleashing my pent-up frustrations on Edward's perfect body. If Alice was right, and we couldn't hurt one another, what harm would it do?

I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't notice I was no longer alone in the room. Carlisle had come back and his arrival brought the strained voices of Michael and Edward to my ears. They had reached the third level landing and a low growl threatened to erupt past my lips. I forced it back though and smiled sadly at Carlisle as he came to stand beside me.

"I'm sorry for all of this." I muttered and looked down at the dark blue blouse I'd picked up to stuff into my bag.

"There's nothing to apologize for." He replied with a small shake of his head as he turned and smoothly sat on the edge of the bed, right where Edward had been just moments before. "I just want you to enjoy your time with Edward. We were already planning on enticing you two to slip away, so Michael's unwanted surprise has just sped up our plans."

I laughed quietly in spite of myself and shook my head. "Already in a hurry to get rid of me, I see how it is."

The expressions on Carlisle's face shifted quickly, first contrite then amused when he caught the joke in my voice. "Insanely anxious to get rid of you so that you can have some fun. You both deserve it after everything you've been through, Houston."

"Was it hard?" I asked suddenly, forgetting all about packing as I turned to face the man I now considered my father. "Was it difficult for Edward to watch me change?"

"It was." I would always be able to count on Carlisle Cullen to never lie to me. There were no secrets in our large family. "He had no idea how the change was affecting you and I think your transformation reminded him of the pain he'd felt during his own. But you did beautifully, Houston. Yes, it hurt him to hear you scream when your heart gave out, but I think I succeeded in convincing him that it would have been much worse. He had expected you to cry and beg him for death, he was ready to talk you through absolutely anything. Just as I'd talked him, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett through theirs. But you just laid there, perfectly still and silent. That unnerved him but Alice didn't stray far from the library either. She was always there to convince him that you would be just fine. He was consoled with the images he saw in her thoughts."

"Do you know what the images were?" I couldn't help it, the questions were forming faster than I could ask them.

"Some of them dealt with how you would look when the change was complete. He was able to see your skin change for himself, and the more accelerated changes in Alice's mind. She saw a wide myriad of senarios as you lay there. She saw no complications, that you would be even more beautiful to Edward than you were in your human life. She also saw you finally becoming comfortable with your physical appearance. When you woke up, you looked nothing like the young woman whose heart had given out shortly before the venom injection."

I breathed an almost silent sigh of relief as I nodded, sure that I would have been crying right then if it were still possible. "Thank you for telling me." I breathed and braved a small smile at him as I finished packing. The duffel was zipped and set on the floor beside Edward's bag before I sat down next to Carlisle. I could still hear Edward and Michael outside the door and frowned. My thoughts were quick though, and I turned to look at my vampire father as new questions were created. "Can I ask you something...personal?"

"Of course." His smile was patient as he laid a hand over mine and squeezed my fingers reassuringly.

"You know that I have no...human experiences with sex. And I've been wondering about it, wondering...."

"What it will be like when you and Edward are able to be physical with one another?"

I groaned in spite of myself and covered my face with my hands. Carlisle laughed quietly and pulled my hands back to my lap. "He's already asked, Houston. So don't be embarrassed. It's natural to worry, which is what I assume you're doing. As far as I can tell, human physicality and vampire physicality is very much the same. You won't have the same worries or anxieties." He grinned slyly at me then continued. "But it's still the most natural thing between two consenting beings that are in love. I do think it will be more...emotional for you and Edward because of everything you two have experienced. Your attractions to one another are unlike anything I've seen, because I haven't ever really seen love experienced the way I have with you two. You fell in love with him as a human, brought out a side of him that we all feared was gone. Your journey was very much the same, even with the differences, and he experienced everything just as you did. For the very first time. You know that I always feared he had been too young when I changed him, right?"

I nodded and swallowed the invisible lump that formed in my throat. A small pocket in my mind noted the new volume of voices outside the room and I was vaguely aware that Edward was moving Michael back downstairs. But I brought myself back into the current conversation and nodded again as I looked up at Carlisle again. "He told me about that when I was still human. That...he'd only thought of joining the war. He didn't find love or anything even close to it while he was still a human himself."

"He didn't." Carlisle sighed and suddenly sounded very ancient. "Even though he's lived for over a hundred years, there are still things about Edward that are very much child-like. You've changed a lot about him, Houston. You've given him things that he wasn't granted while his heart still beat. He loves you with every single cell in his body, and that passion is much stronger in a vampire than it is a human."

"You can say that again." I muttered darkly, absently remembering how I'd felt when I woke up and saw my husband for the very first time. "I used to think that loving Edward as much as I did would break me. That I wasn't strong enough...as a human, to experience it all and make it last. Now, everything feels so _new_. It's completely different from how I felt to him just a couple of weeks ago. It's so much stronger now than I thought it could've ever been."

"And that's completely natural." Carlisle patted my hand again and the grin remained on his face. "Your heightened senses make everything that much more powerful. And the same will be true when you two are together for the very first time. I doubt you will have very much success in staying restrained. Not just you, but Edward as well. This will be every bit as new to you as it is to him."

"Because we both died as virgins." I snorted quietly, still not used to that term applying to both of us. I couldn't see anyone as beautiful as Edward with that word applicable.

Carlisle nodded instead of responding to my injection. "You're going to be just fine, sweetheart. Just take things as they come and remember that we will be right here, waiting patiently for your return when it's safe."

I sighed and nodded, blinking in surprise when Carlisle's timing became perfectly. Edward entered the room just seconds after our father's final word and his expression instantly lightened when he saw us on the bed.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked, his eyes dancing brightly in the limited light from the moon outside.

I scrambled to my feet, very ungraceful for a vampire in my opinion. Of course, Edward and Carlisle laughed, causing me to stick my tongue out childishly at both of them then I joined my husband so we could make our hasty escape. But just as I reached his side, I remembered a thought that had occured to me during the family meeting.

"Uh, Edward?" I asked and looked up at him curiously. "What did you do with my wedding rings?"


	15. Chapter 15

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**__ New chapter! For some reason, I felt the need to announce that. Anyway! Sorry it took me so long, I had a million different ideas of how I wanted to write this chapter. Warning y'all now though, if you're bothered by sexual references and all that fun mess, wait a few chapters. Smut galore! Maybe. I sometimes think a story is better if there's some stuff left to the imagination. Plus, the whole vampire world is completely different from human and it's a little daunting to write certain aspects of that. But! I tried my best and hopefully you guys like it. Again, __**thank you so so much**__ for all the reviews. I read every one of them and appreciate them all and the time you guys take out to let me know what you think. I know this is riddled with gramatical errors and I don't always use the right words to further things along, but that's just because I don't have anyone to proof this story with fresh eyes. My choice. So! Yeah, enough babbling from me, let's get on with it!_

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius that owns the original Cullens. I only own Houston and the rambly flow of words. No copyright infringement or slander intended. Please review!_

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen:**

My rings had been resized and were back in place on my finger. We had successfully avoided detection while leaving Forks and were now standing on the powdery sand of Esme's island. Everything had gone according to plan and I felt relaxed for the first time since waking up to this new life.

Our bags had already been put in the house, the beautiful white room that had been ours during our first visit. Now we were free to just enjoy the scenery and each other. My feet were bare and the dress I'd grudgingly traveled in was surprisingly unrumpled as I slid my toes through the soft sand.

"I can't believe how different this place looks to me now." I breathed and a dreamy little smile curved my lips as I continued to watch the waves break seamlessly against the beach.

Edward moved behind me and tightly wound his arms around my waist. I snickered in spite of myself when he kissed the back of my exposed neck, his breath tickling my skin as his hands glided across my flat stomach slowly. "Does it look better or worse than our first visit?"

"Better." I decided and tilted my head to look up at him. "So much better. The colors are more vibrant, the ocean is more calming to me, and...I'm not on the brink of death anymore."

Velvet laughter filled the air and enveloped us as he pressed a kiss to my temple. The wind caught my hair and blew it lazily over Edward's shoulder as I rested my head against the curve of his collarbone. "You definitely don't have to worry about that anymore, my love. We can finally have the honeymoon of your dreams."

"Really?" A bright grin split my features as I turned in his arms to face him. His arms loosened enough for me to be able to turn then constricted around my midsection once I'd stopped. It felt exhilerating that he no longer needed to be careful with me. He'd seriously been holding out on me in the kissing department and I was determined to make up for lost time! "What if..." I started, intentionally trailing off as my arms lazily wrapped around his shoulders, "my dream honeymoon consisted of very little clothing?"

"I'm sure you could find a way to twist my arm into agreeing." He teased, smiling my favorite grin as he reached up with one hand to push back stray locks of dark hair. He trapped them against the side of my head and leaned down to kiss me. The pressure was agonizingly light at first, but when I accidentally nipped at his lower lip; he temporarily abandoned self-control and crushed me against him as his tongue pushed my lips apart. My senses swirled yet again and I willingly sagged into his embrace. I wouldn't _dare_ dream of pulling from him now, not when I was finally free to let my emotions run wild. I pressed my body tighter against his, laughing aloud when we suddenly stumbled.

Edward managed to catch himself before he fell and quickly scooped me up into his arms. "Time to move before we take out a few dozen trees."

"If we have to." I sighed then leaned over and busied myself with kissing as much of the exposed skin on his neck as I could. He sighed quietly in delight as he carried us inside and to the bedroom he'd picked out for us. I wiggled out of his arms and kissed his lips quickly and soundly before I started to back away. "Okay, ready to indulge me? Something I've always wanted to do with you."

A familiar glint filled his liquid eyes, causing my stomach to do one somersault after another as he let me push him to the edge of the mosquito-netted bed in the center of the room. His eyes didn't even widen when he was suddenly sitting and his hands didn't move even an inch from where they had been gripping my waist since I regained my footing. "Ready and willing, love."

I couldn't help but smile as I leaned down and kissed him again then danced away before he could catch me. Snatching up my bag, I just blew him another kiss then disappeared into the closest bathroom I could find. This room was even more beautiful than I'd remembered, the color scheme jumping out at me but I was too distracted to really see anything. I was too focused as I removed the dress Alice had guilted me into wearing and pulled on the ivory satin nightgown that Rosalie had talked me into. The straps were very thin, easily breakable in a frenzy, and the simple satin folds conformed invitingly to my chest, stomach, and thighs. The skirt was short, ending just below the downward swell of my bottom. I pulled the clip out of my hair and shook my head wildly, grinning when I stopped and watched my hair settle against my shoulders and back. The strands were slightly wavy from being pulled back for an extended period of time, and I smiled in satisfaction at my reflection. I looked just as I wanted to for this milestone in my and Edward's life together.

It wasn't until I actually stepped back into the bedroom that nerves began to get the better of me. It was one thing to think about being with my husband, it was entirely differen to actually _being_ with him. But as soon as I saw him, twisting his fingers anxiously as he awaited my return, the nerves just floated away and I was momentarily distracted from my carefully thought-out plans. I still couldn't believe that I was so deserving of someone like Edward. Even though I was now his equal in every single way, minus time, I still felt inferior toward him at times. But as I stood there, watching him stare pointedly at the movements of his long, slender fingers; I was reminded of the boyish vulnerability he might have possessed as a human seventeen-year-old boy. He was forever encased in that mold, in the same mold that I'd created for myself. We were on equal footing in this area, neither of us having ever thought we would find this level of love and commitment with another person. The way I loved him was so completely different from the way he loved me, but I felt confirmed in the thought that it was something that would never be taken for granted. Even though we had that possibility of forever, I would still spend every moment cherishing and praising whichever higher power now looked down on us for giving him to me.

Once I regained my train of thought and was able to force my body to start moving again, I cleared my throat quietly as I stopped about a foot in front of him. He looked up quickly, his face frozen in a mask of apprehension, then it faded away quickly when his bright gold eyes scanned my entire body from head to bare toes. "Houston...." He breathed, his voice already raspy as he moved to stand up.

I was so thankful that I was quick, reaching him before he could fully stand. I gently pushed on his shoulders to make him sit back down, easily feeling the small, shy smile playing on my lips. "Indulging, remember?" I teased quietly, my voice unruffled by the emotions swirling around within me.

"I'm sorry." He grinned crookedly up at me and lightly laid his hands on my hips. "It's usually difficult for me to think clearly whenever you're around. But now...? I honestly didn't know you could ever look more beautiful to me than you do on a daily basis."

If it were possible, his words would have made me instantly start blushing. The only heat I felt was internal, wafting through me like a slow burn that originated underneath his touch. "Now you know how I feel whenever I look at you." I couldn't stop teasing him, but we both knew that it was all out of love. I could never intentionally be malicious toward him. Leaning down, I lightly brushed my lips against his then raised back to my full height before he had a chance to retailiate. I knew that if he did, if he kissed me with everything he'd been forced to keep bottled up while I was human, I would lose control completely and everything would, not necessarily be ruined, but I would lose the chance to test my confidence and do this the way I'd already planned.

A deep, unnecessary breath was taken as I reached up and brushed the straps of the gown off my shoulders. I relished in the flutter the fabric created against my skin as the thin pieces of thick satin fell around my biceps and one small move of my hips caused the domino effect I'd been hoping for. The gown practically glided down my body, exposing my chest, then my stomach, and finally my hips and thighs before fluttering down into a puddle around my feet. Edward's sharp intake of breath pierced through me more fiercely than any other sound he could've made and I could see the obviousness that his restraint was creating. I could only guess how badly he wanted to move right then, but he didn't. He was like a statue in front of me, his hands resting limply in his lap. My perfect Adonis, keeping himself in tight control so that he could give me this moment.

I stepped out of the gown and carefully kicked the fabric away, feeling a little shy as I stood completely naked in front of him. He'd seen me this way several times before, but it was nothing like now. Before I'd been sick and wasting away, my human heart trudging on to give us more time to prepare. Now I was perfect. My skin was soft, but hard as it stretched over my shoulders, arms, forever petite breasts, flat stomach with faint hints of my human scars. The thing that had thrilled me the most when I changed was my skin fading the radiation scars that had attested to the torture I put myself through. My legs not only looked but felt strong, muscles just soft outlines against the skin of my thighs, calves, and ankles. The indentions of his teeth were now my most prominant scars. Every single fatal kiss he'd given me as venom was unleashed into my system was now a physical testiment to what I'd endeavored to secure forever with my immortal love. These were scars I could and did wear with pride, hoping that Edward didn't feel the slighest bit of sorrow or guilt when he found them embedded in my granite skin. "Do I...?"

I couldn't even finish the sentence but I didn't really need to. He didn't have to have access to my innermost thoughts to know what I was wanting to ask right then. He stood then and his arms wound around my waist within mere seconds of his balance reshifting. "There's no vampire or human on this planet than can hold a candle to you." And then suddenly, his resolve wavered before disappearing all together.

I was all-too happy to oblige when his lips landed on mine, stone against stone as they conveyed the passion and heat flowing between us. Our movements felt fluid as we worked together to discard his clothing until he was left just as naked as I was. I had to force myself to pull my lips from his so that I could appreciate his body the way I'd been hoping to for so long. I felt a silent thrill shoot through me when Edward sighed quietly as I kissed along the impression of his collarbone, my hands seeking out every single muscular indention I could find as my kisses fluttered over the smooth, lean expanse of his chest. A small squeal of delight erupted through me when he became too impatient and sent us both crashing onto the bed.

The frame groaned under the force of our weight, neither of us moving until we were sure that we hadn't broken the bed.

"Esme's never going to invite us back here." I whispered in a breathless giggle, which was promptly cut off by a moan of pure ecstacy when his hands glided over the curves of my new body.

"Sure she will." He chuckled against my skin and chills ran zig-zagged lines up and down the curve of my spine as his lips danced enticingly over the curve of my breasts. There was absolutely no hesitation fueling his movements, only a determined sense of restraint as his hand molded perfectly against my right breast. "You're even more beautiful than I imagined." He breathed against my skin and his hands strayed lower down my body.

I forced my back to stay against the mattress as his hand flattened over my abdomen. The one part of my body that I'd worried incessantly about during the last of my human days. I had never been able to clearly formulate a mental image of my new body in my mind. There'd been no way that I could have predicted looking like this. Or the reaction that seeing me like this had on Edward. "You thought about this?" I breathed, my thoughts a random pattering of incoherency. Even with all the room now in my head, I couldn't concentrate on anything but the man laying over me.

"Of course." He sounded so unabashed as he stopped and shifted so that he was laying directly over me now. His hips settled between my thighs and as I readjusted my legs to accomodate the curve of his lower body, I could easily feel his arousal against my inner thigh. I had to fight to keep my thoughts from centering around the rampant desire flowing through me so I could concentrate clearly on what he was about to say. The expression on his face was one I'd never seen before, his eyes darkening as they met mine. I don't know how it was possible, but the obvious craving for each other softened the lines of his face. He looked more boyish right then than I'd ever seen him before. "It wasn't some kind of...compulsion, or anything like that. I just wondered."

I knew what kind of smile lit up my face before I felt my lips twist. I wasn't really sure of what to say to that, how to respond to his words. So instead I just leaned up and greedily pressed my lips against his. It wasn't so much lust fueling me, but the clear and defining pressure of craving that had developed deep within me. It was something that had always been there, but buried deep underneath layers upon layers of depression, fear, and uncertainty.

That one kiss reignited everything. Our hands were soon moving in a frenzy, trying to cover as much exposed skin as possible. Time ceased to mean anything as Edward continued to move over me, pushing me closer and closer to a point of craziness that I'd never felt before in my life. I didn't think about how I looked or sounded as I breathlessly begged to have him inside of me. The all-consuming need to have that connection with him didn't allow me to hold on to any preconcieved notion of how women were supposed to act in bed. After all, if I couldn't tell my husband that I wanted him, how was I going to be able to tell him any other private thought that I wanted to share with him?

If he was the least bit put off by my breathless request, he didn't show it. All I could clearly see on his perfect face was the exact same things I felt right then. The desire, the passion, the endless ocean of need. The silence lingered as he continued to stare at me, his darkening eyes penetrating the soul he thought neither of us had then suddenly, every single thing in the world melted away as he slid into me for the very first time. The vision Carlisle had told me about came true right then, and I would never be able to doubt my husband's love for me as our bodies began to unleash everything that had been held at bay for so long.


	16. Chapter 16

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__Another chapter, slightly less M-rated than the one before it. Please let me know what you guys think, I keep changing my mind on how I want this story to turn out._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens, I own Houston and the rambly flow of words. Please review!_

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**Chapter Sixteen:**

If eternity was spent being able to worship my husband's body, it was an eternity I would never complain about.

Edward had made good on calling my bluff. Neither one of us had even bothered to get dressed since I walked into the white bedroom in my nightgown. He had claimed that it was so none of our belongings would get destroyed in the throws of passion, but I couldn't entirely be sure.

Either way, it was just easier to stay naked. I honestly couldn't get enough of watching him walk around the house, his lean figure rippling with hidden muscles. He honestly never ceased to amaze me. Even now, with absolutely no barriers remaining between us, everytime I looked at Edward Cullen, I felt like I was seeing him for the very first time.

But it all felt completely effortless, even when we lay in bed together afterward. There was no need for the physical relaxation, other than it just felt _nice_ to be able to lay with him in a comfortable silence. The hours felt like they were just flying by, Edward's fingers lazily tracing the indention of my spine as his chest rose and fell mechanically underneath my head. Finally, I think, the silence became too much for him and his voice was soft as he tilted his head to kiss the crown of my hair. "I'm sorry you had to spend your birthday in exile."

My head jerked up at his soft words, my eyes wide with astonishment. I'd completely forgotten what the date was, time didn't mean the same to me anymore. But he'd remembered. Of course he remembered that we had finally reached my eighteenth birthday. The shock slowly faded from my face, being replaced by a small, content smile before I leaned up and lightly brushed my lips against his. I grudgingly pulled back before the gesture could reignite the electricity between us. Electricity that hadn't dimmed one bit in hours of passionate abandonment. "I honestly wasn't planning on celebrating my birthday." I joked quietly, an easy smile still playing on my lips. "And for the record? My wish came true."

"What wish?" He asked immediately, a smile of his own playing on his features as his touch continued to dance up and down my bare back.

As quickly as the wish formed on the tip of my tongue, it disappeared just as fast. I'd kept so many fantasies from him during my human days, fearing that they would put too much pressure on him and worry him even more than he already had been. But this was an easy wish to talk about. After all, it was one that had come true. "Forever seventeen." I replied bashfully, sure that my cheeks would be burning in embarrassment if not for my alabaster complection. "I hated the thought of possibly being older than you before I died. The way I saw it? If you were going to be eternally seventeen, I wanted the same thing. I wanted that equality between us."

"My silly, beautiful wife." He laughed and easily flipped us over so that he was now laying over me. My hand slid up his arm slowly, fingers absently tracing the flex of muscles underneath his skin as he braced himself over my upper body. "You could have told me that."

"I know." I nodded and smiled in spite of the embarrassment I still felt. Leaning up, I lightly kissed him again then sighed happily when he laid against me. His head was positioned right over where my heart used to thump against my chest, his hand now dancing against my hip and the side of my stomach as his breath blew invitingly over my collarbone. "Do you miss it?" I asked suddenly, the tone of my voice softening more than it had just moments before.

"Miss what?" Edward didn't look up at my question. To my surprise, I found his eyes closed as he continued to trace random patterns against my skin.

"My heart beating." I admitted, still just as quiet as I slid my hand up and down his arm; the other gliding into the back of his hair. "I'm not warm or soft, breakable anymore and I've just been wondering if you miss it at all."

"Of course not." He breathed against my skin, tilting his head to lightly drag his lips over my shoulder before looking up at me. I wanted to whimper when I saw the look in his eyes; pure determination and honesty. I swallowed the noise back, but bit down on my bottom lip when he continued to stare intensely down at me. "I do sometimes miss your heartbeat, yes. But that's just because I'd become so intuned to it. That was my source of sanity, how I knew you were still with me. But I don't miss how breakable you once were. You're so vibrant and healthy now, something I honestly never thought I would get to see because I feared I wouldn't be able to save you in time. But as for the warmth...?" I wanted to kick him when he trailed off, but my newfound patience was rewarded when he began to drop kisses over my chest and the upward swell of my breasts. "You're still warm to me, Houston. Not quite as warm as you once were, but now I no longer fear touching you and finding your skin as cold as mine is."

Undeniable grief swelled within me right then, breaking my dormant heart into a million, ficticious pieces as I stared up at the ceiling. I couldn't bring myself to look at Edward right then, knowing he would see everything I felt in my eyes. I never imagined he suffered as he did during my human days. I knew it was difficult for him, but to hear him talk about it now, with it all in the past, felt like tiny razor blades were flowing through my veins. "I'm sorry."

Edward's lips were on mine before my mind registered his sudden shift of weight. A broken sigh filled my throat as I kissed him back, my fingers tightening in his hair slightly when I recognized the sound I'd just made. The closest thing to a sob that I would ever get. He pulled away and his eyes began to blaze yet again. "Never apologize to me for that, Houston." His words came in a throaty rasp of a whisper, the emotion backing them sending chills spiraling throughout me. "Once you told me what was happening, I knew what I would be getting myself into. And I have no regrets but one. I should be the one apologizing to you for waiting so long. I forced you to waste away even more, and be in unspeakable pain as your body shut down."

"But I don't remember feeling any of it." I whispered in almost quiet wonder. I really didn't. The agony of my transformation overpowered every other source of pain I'd felt. "I don't remember feeling my kidneys shutting down, or my heart stop. Well, okay I remember it stopping for the last time. But when Carlisle had to revive me? I didn't even realized it had happened until I heard him tell you."

"You were conscious for that, were you?" Ancient grief constricted his words as he stared down at my chest then reached out to brush his fingertips over the patch of skin that covered my unbeating heart. "I was hopeful, _so hopeful_ that you were unconscious for that. I can't imagine what I put you through when I shoved that needle into your heart."

"Don't think about it." I whispered and reached out to guide his eyes back to mine. More knives felt like they were slicing through my body and my mind worked frantically for some way to erase the turmoil and guilt from my husband's glorious eyes. I never wanted him to feel regret for saving me, for giving me the one thing I'd been too afraid to ask for. Afraid because I'd felt like I didn't deserve it. "Yes, I felt it when that needle pierced my heart but I lost consciousness so quickly that I couldn't make sense of it all. One moment, I was kissing you and the next...my heart gave out. I hate that you heard me scream."

"I honestly expected worse." He still spoke quietly with grief strengthening his words. Pausing long enough to kiss the source of my former heartbeat, he looked up at me again as he shifted. His thighs slid between mine effortlessly and I didn't think as I loosely wound my legs against his hips. "I expected you to beg me for death. I tried to prepare myself for how I would feel when you craved immediate release from my venom."

"But it never happened." I challenged quickly, feeling like I hadn't said enough in my own defence. "I knew the price I would have to pay and I did it willingly. There's nothing on this planet that could change my mind about wanting forever with you. No amount of pain could ever have swayed me from what I wanted."

"I'm entirely too undeserving of you." He laughed suddenly, a bit of relieved exuberance filtering between us. I laughed too, still not used to the current of bells tinkling in my new tone of voice. His lips met mine again and I responded carefully. It didn't take long for the desire and insatiable want to build up within us, especially given how we were laying. I easily ignored the uncomfortable tightening in my chest but couldn't keep from arching into Edward's body when his tongue glided slowly over mine. He was being agonizingly slow, I could tell but didn't care. As long as he kept kissing me, I had absolutely no complaints. I would never be able to formulate a clear objection to the delicious torture he could now inflict on me with no overbaring consequences.

* * *

It was difficult, but I finally pulled away from Edward. Even after the frenzy of our lovemaking, I still couldn't get a tight control over how restless my body felt whenever I stayed still for too long. It was almost as if I had too much strength in my tiny body. Edward had to call home and I was willing to give him some privacy so that he could concentrate on what was going on at home. I pulled a random set of clothes on; khaki capri pants and a fitted white button down shirt; then headed out to the beach. I intentionally left my feet bare and smiled when the sand conformed effortlessly under my heels, insoles, and toes.

Scrunching my feet just enough to pull tiny grains between my toes, I sighed happily and tilted my head toward the inviting warmth of the midday sun. It didn't feel the same as it used to, now that I was no longer human. The outside world had no affect on my permanant body temperature. But it still felt glorious to have the warming rays caressing my hard skin. I had just stretched my hands out to my sides slightly when a noise broke through my reviere. Instinct propelled me around quickly, hair flying over the shoulder of my shirt and catching in the collar. My hair barely tickled my chest, I was too focused on Edward's features as he slowly emerged from the fringe of trees.

I pushed away the sudden hatred of seeing him dressed, not even taking in what he actually wore. He looked so mad as his bare feet lightly kicked up sand in his haste to reach me.

"What's wrong?" It was the only question I could think to ask.

"It's Margie." Edward's voice was grave as he lightly gripped my arms and bent his knees enough to look me in the eye. "She and Derrick were in a car accident."


	17. Chapter 17

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__Keeping the note short this time. Rated M for angst and sexual stuff._

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens. I own Houston and the random jumbling of words. Please review!_

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**Chapter Seventeen:**

Reality always showed up when you least expected it. We had left to escape one problem, but yet something else reached us anyway.

I now felt like I was locked in some invisible tug-of-war. The desire to go home and be there for Margie was warring violently against the realism of my situation. I couldn't go home. I'd turned my back on humanity for Edward and I had to uphold that decision. My last foster mother had no idea that I was still alive. The Cullens were far too convincing when they wanted to be and the entire town, minus Michael Sherwood, was convinced that I lay in a Texas cemetary.

I didn't say anything as I carefully combed through Edward's bag. I was supposed to be packing for us, we had to keep moving if we wanted to stay undetected. I'd never realized just how difficult this life would be for the first few years. After all, there was an entire town of people, not to mention the government; that knew I was deceased. Houston Cullen didn't exist and couldn't exist for a very long time.

My thoughts snapped when my fingers brushed over something rough, hidden beneath the folds of Edward's khakis. Pulling it out curiously, I wasn't aware I was biting down on my lip until my teeth snapped together. I didn't even know it was possible to feel like I was suffocating as I unfolded the large newspaper clipping, the bold nameplate of Forks' only newspaper barely registering in my mind. There was a large photo on the left side of the meticulously cut page, tiny print flowing underneath and to the right of it. But the things I could clearly see, other than the smiling, sepia-hued faces; was the name bolded underneath the picture. _Houston Elizabeth Cullen._

My obituary. My knees felt locked underneath me, but yet a small flicker of surprise registered in my mind when I found myself on the floor. My legs had curled to my chest in a weird sort of gravitational pull and my eyes didn't move an inch away from the smiling faces now burning into my infallible memory. Edward and me just before my human death. I could vaguely remember Alice taking that picture. It had been a rare day of sunshine in Forks and Edward had agreed to let me sit outside and enjoy it. We ended up curled together on the front steps of the porch, my glorious lover sitting behind me with my frail, heavily bundled body between his knees. Of course, Alice had come out of nowhere, snapped the picture, then darted off before Edward could rise to take the camera away from her. I had decided against seeing the developed product then, but now it was slapping me in the face. I honestly didn't know how he'd been able to keep it all together. I looked so gaunt, even with the added bulk of sweaters and blankets. My imminent death was spelled out very clearly in the lines of my face. My smile was strained, faint lines surrounding my eyes when they crinkled into the swallow skin of my temple, cheek, and forehead.

How had Edward been able to stand it all?

It was almost as if I'd called him by name. One minute I was thinking of him and the next, he was entering the white bedroom. I couldn't bring myself to look up at him when he crouched beside me, his hands on my shoulders in an attempt to pull me from my thoughts. But it was unsuccessful. I couldn't look away from the dying woman staring up at me.

"Houston?" His voice finally broke through, rough velvet strained to the point of breaking. "Answer me, please? What's wrong?"

"I..." I swallowed thickly, even though I didn't need to, and held the clipping out limply for him to inspect. He took the crinkled newspaper from my hand then sighed heavily as he slid onto the floor beside me.

"I was wondering when you would see this." He muttered and drapped the obituary over his thigh then caught my gaze and held it mercilessly. "Love, we had to do that. We _had_ to give the town legitimate proof. For your sake."

"For my sake." I muttered hollowly. I'd been warned ahead of time that a newborn's moodswings were thoroughly unpredictable. They also varied in intensity so it surprised me a little when fury suddenly bloomed beneath my frozen skin. I wasn't entirely sure of where it stemmed from, or what had caused it. But yet I moved blindingly fast as I lurched to my feet and began to pace away from Edward, who had become like a statue when I started to move. I couldn't think clearly and this was the very first time I felt so unlike myself since waking up. It all felt suddenly unfair. I was the one that had to hide, I had to be invisible while Edward and the rest of my family could go on with their lives. After all, their immediate, human family was long gone. They were considered humans in our world. Dangerously beautiful humans that were looked at curiously. But always from a distance. I couldn't have that.

Even though I did have an amazing sense of self-restraint when it came to the flow of human blood, I was still the invisible one in my family. No one could know about me. Even though I knew this was what I'd signed up for, it abruptly felt like too much to take in. Why did I have to continously find a flaw in the grand scheme of my life? It was supposed to be easier now, so much easier. I was no longer weighed down by the restraints of mortality, there was no longer a limit to my days. But yet, the bonds of my _im_mortality felt so much heavier. Had I really been as ready for this as I'd assumed while I lay dying?

"Houston." Edward sounded like a long-lost echo as he reached out to grab my shoulder. Instincts propelled me away from him, a strange thud resonating behind me when my back collided against the wall that held the bedroom's entryway upright.

"Don't." I muttered, not meeting his eyes as I held my hands out slightly in front of me. Had I still been mortal, I knew I would have fallen to the floor in a fit of tears right then. But that was yet another thing now lost to me in this new body. Even if Margie recovered, even if she was miraculously cured and given a second chance at life, I would never be able to grieve for her in the only way I knew were things to take the other route. What would I do if she died? Would I ever find out what had caused the car accident? Had Derrick lived up to my dark, human theories and finally dragged her into dispair? "Don't...not right now. I don't want to hear it."

He opened and closed his mouth several times, causing me to look up at him for the first time since I moved. The agony in his eyes shown brightly, even in the limited source of light streaming in from the moon outside the house. He reached for me once again, but I was too quick. My eyes fell to the floor again as I crossed the room in three wide strides and began to shove things into my duffel. I had no idea what I was doing, or what I even _wanted_ to do. I just knew that I had to escape the sudden, consuming grief that was threatening to break me in two. I didn't feel very invincible right then, my body somehow foreign to me as I pulled the strap onto my shoulder and turned to leave. I feared the final break, the one thing that would bring me to my knees and leave me unable to regain my footing.

"Houston." Edward spoke with a firm authority that surprised me, making him able to grab me before I completely left the room. I vaguely noted his cell phone when it began to go off. No doubt, Alice calling to ask why she'd forseen me setting out on my own. "Talk to me, _please_?"

"What's there to say?" I muttered, my voice dead and hollow. My eyes focused on the line of buttons holding his shirt to his body and my fingers twitched anxiously against the strap pulling on the collar of my own shirt. "I didn't know it would be this hard. I didn't know what I was getting myself into."

There it was. I looked up just in time to see pure agony flow unobstructed across his angelic face. While I didn't regret being changed and loving Edward as much as I did, I just hated the circumstances. I was supposed to feel free now, not hindered and rendered even more useless than before. "I'm sorry." The pain in his voice twisted my insides into knots and I looked up quickly for confirmation in the thought that suddenly occured to me. Of course, he was misconstruing my words. He was standing there, holding me at arm's length, assuming that I was voicing regret for him stopping my heart.

The bag slipped off my shoulder and thumped against the floor, my hands remained limp at my sides. "I don't regret being changed." I muttered, hating that I again felt like I wasn't saying enough. But I couldn't see how to make him understand. How did I tell Edward that he had been right when he told me that I would be a prisoner to this new life?

"Then what do you regret?" His eyes blazed suddenly in fury. Unbridled hatred that likened the expression he had worn the first day I sat down beside him in Physics. That felt like so long ago, the memory murky thanks to my fallible, human eyes. "What's causing you to act like this? I'm trying to understand, Houston. I honestly am. But you need to _talk_ to me! You can't keep running from me when you feel out of control."

I flinched as if I'd been slapped, recalling nearly every time I'd tried to put distance between us. When he had patronized me about finding out his secret. Leaving Forks so that Margie wouldn't have to choose between me and Derrick. Each time I'd gone back to him willingly. That magnetic pull forever embedded in our skin. "I just want to see her." I muttered miserably, my voice unleashing the tears that my eyes could not. I didn't resist when I was suddenly pulled up against Edward's immobile body, my arms acted like a vice around his waist. Yet again, he became my lifeline. The only thing I could clearly hold onto so I wouldn't break apart. I doubted all the power in the world wouldn't give me the strength to keep from floundering. "I'm so sorry." I muttered miserably and suddenly tilted my head to rain kisses along the smooth curve of his neck. In the back of my mind, I was surprised by my actions, but a quiet voice was still clutching at my need for reassurance. I hated the thought that I'd made Edward believe, even for a second, that I regret my life with him.

Everything suddenly felt like a massive jumble in my mind and I became desperate to escape it all. We were supposed to just be enjoying each other and the time together. This wasn't what I'd hoped for our little vacation of sorts. We weren't celebrating this new life the way I had wanted. I didn't think as I stretched myself up on my toes and pressed my lips to his hungrily. Edward responded impressively, crushing me against him even more. Had I still been human in this moment, my bones would have easily cracked under his grip. But there was no fear of being hurt now and my mind focused solely on the intense craving suddenly building within me. I _needed_ to be with him, I _needed_ that reaffirmation that I belonged with him and that everything would work itself out.

I didn't even bother to put up a fight when our movements became a little more frenzied. Edward released my lips suddenly and a broken gasp of surprise bubbled past my lips when he reached out and easily yanked my shirt open. The buttons showered between us, bouncing off his powerful chest as he shoved the fabric down my arms. I swatted away the torn top and quickly ran my hands up his stomach, clenching his shirt between my fingers as they stopped on his chest. His lips clamped down on the corner of my jaw and the room was suddenly filled with ripping cotton. Wrenching apart for just a second, I couldn't bring myself to look the least bit bashful when I realized that my hands were clenched with pieces of his shirt still curled between my fingers. "Oops." I muttered.

He just snickered, of course, in spite of everything swirling around us and shrugged out of the remaining pieces of cotton. "Didn't want to wear it anyway." He teased, his voice still raspy with light puffs of breath flowing across my face as he pulled me back to him. My hands unclenched at once as my arms folded around his neck. I couldn't help the low moan that emitted when our bare chests crashed together. I could feel the pressure of Edward's hands when they curled around the back of my thighs and readjusted my weight when my feet suddenly left the floor. "Make love to me?" I breathed into his ear, one hand leaving his body long enough to push my hair out of the way before my lips began to cover every single piece of exposed flesh that I could find.

He didn't respond verbally and I knew that he wouldn't. His answer was clear when I was suddenly shoved back against the wall. The plaster behind my shoulders gave easily and I knew there would be a hole there later. I kept my legs clamped around his waist and my back pushed against the wall for a little more leverage so that my kisses could travel lower down my husband's body. He put me down long enough for our jeans to be pushed aside then I was back in his arms. I could easily feel his growing arrousal between the thin layers of cotton that separated our bodies and the desperate need to have him inside me intensified so much that I roughly grinded my hips into his. The growl that filled his chest and throat was like music to my ears as he moved suddenly and sent us crashing to the floor. His body supported mine during the impact and I pulled my legs from around his waist so that his body was flat against the wooden surface. I couldn't stop when my hips began to grind into his mercilessly, my teeth scraping against the taunt skin covering his stomach. This time, it was a low moan that broke from him while his long, strong fingers glided over my haunched back before coming around to cup my breasts.

"Edward," I sighed into his stomach, a delicious friction sparking between us. It was even more heightened with the panties and boxers still hindering us. That simple statement, my voice stretching longingly around his name seemed to free him from whatever restraint he still held himself under. I was pushed up onto my knees long enough for his boxers to be yanked down, my panties being ripped away right before our hips met yet again. This time with absolutely nothing holding us back as our bodies crashed into one.


	18. Chapter 18

_Stephenie Meyer owns the original Cullens. I own Houston and the random jumbling of words. Please review!_

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**Chapter Eighteen:**

"I'm sorry." Edward's voice was still quiet as he breathed the words into my hair. I was still laying over him, my head resting against his shoulders with my legs tucked tightly against his sides. Because we were still so intimately connected, it was a little tough for either of us to get up.

"For what?" I asked just as softly, reaching up to push hair off my temple before I let my hand slide across the exposed part of his chest, to the floor underneath. Even though I'd always thought of our bodies as made of stone, there was still a hugely irresistable softness that always lured me in.

"I jumped to conclusions." He sighed and raked a hand through his unruly crop of hair before letting that arm fall back over his head. Lifting my head, I couldn't help but smile a little at the sight of him. There was absolutely no stress or worry on his face, his body completely relaxed underneath me with his eyes closed. "I didn't think about the moodswings and how new everything still is to you." He sighed again and tilted his head to look at me as he reached out to run his fingers through my hair. "When I look at you...when I see you restrain yourself so that you can stay in control - I forget that you're still a newborn."

"Don't." I shook my head quickly and leaned up just enough to press my lips to his. How was it fair to let him apologize for something that I, myself saw? There had been countless times since I woke up in our bedroom at home, where it completely slipped my mind. I was constantly having to remember just how old I was to this new life. I reluctantly pulled away but ended up laughing in surprise when Edward suddenly grabbed me and stood up. Just half a second later, he was falling back on the bed. I bounced against him, snickering at the sound of two rocks colliding, then it went silent. I kept my next statement at bay until we were once again comfortable. "I forget that too sometimes. Sometimes I feel exactly the same as I did before, just...healthier. You saved my life, Edward. That's the way I see it and that's the way I'm always going to see it."

"It was in my power to give you something you wanted most. I can still hear you tell me about wanting to stop your heart on your own terms."

"But it's more than that." I sighed and raised up enough so that I could clearly stare into the eyes of my angel, bracing my upper body with my hands on either sides of his shoulders. "You did so much more than make me immortal. You saw past everything that I had spent so much time creating. You were able to break through when no one else could and you never made me feel like I was going to die. I know you feared it, I _know_ that your biggest fear became not being there in time to save me. But you did. You put aside your own beliefs about the life you'd been dealt and let me make a choice for myself. You let me decide how I wanted my life to turn out, you...you let me fall in love with you. Eternity isn't going to be nearly enough time for me to repay you for everything you've given me."

The smile on his face was nearly blinding with relief as his hands slipped up and down my sides slowly. Of course, it was my most favorite smile, crookedly perfect and reaching his eyes. They were darkening with the time that had lapsed since our last hunt, but I couldn't see any imperfections right then. I'd never been able to, of course, but now it was even more impossible for me to think that there was any chink in his perfection. He leaned up long enough to kiss me, our lips still lightly molding against one another as he pulled me back against him. I sighed quietly and brushed my lips over his jaw before I settled back against him once more. He was quiet for a time, soothing circles being created against my skin under his hands. I relaxed fully with a small smile on my lips and kissed his chest just as he began to speak once more. "What do you say we go visit Tanya and her family in Alaska?"

My eyebrows wrinkled at once and I leaned up enough to look at him again. "What?"

"Have you ever spent a winter in the snow? I mean, not just in a place where it snows but actually _able _to enjoy it?"

I bit down on my lip unconsciously and shook my head slowly. "No. By the time I was placed in northern states, I was too sick to acclimate to weather properly."

"So what do you say?" He asked again, his face brightening as a new plan began to form in his mind. I could tell, just by the small creases in his expression, that he wanted this very much. "You won't have to worry about the human population, their home is so secluded that you'd have to go to them." I laughed in spite of myself at his joke, shooting him a sheepish look when his face contorted in amused impatience. "And you can enjoy the weather. We can spend as much time as we want out in the snow. You'll be able to act on human experiences that were stolen from you before."

That one simple statement was what had me. Edward didn't play fair when it came to convincing me to see things his way. I didn't mind it in the least. After all, he knew more about this life than I did and I would always trust his judgement impecibly. Still biting down on my lower lip, I pretended to eye him skeptically before visibly caving. "I just ask for one favor." I muttered, almost afraid that mentioning this would ruin the improvement of our collective moods. "Can we go home long enough for me to see if Margie is okay? Once I know that, I promise, you can take me anywhere you want and I won't try to interfere while our family continues to try and get rid of Michael."

Silence fell yet again and Edward's expression changed as he mulled over my one, small request. I silently promised to not do anything that would make things even more difficult on him. I wasn't going to be a distraction after choosing to give me something that I honestly needed. "Okay," He responded after a brief pause and kiss to the tip of my nose. "We'll leave as soon as possible."

* * *

It was winter in Forks. I knew there was a particular bite to the wind, but only because this was the same weather that had welcomed me when I moved in with Margie. It felt like so long ago, driving into the Forks city limits in a rented car. The only difference between this time and the year before was the darkness surrounding the highway and cropping of trees.

Because we were back in Forks, no one could see me. It wasn't something I particularly minded. After all, the only people I had feared leaving behind were the Cullens. I was now one of them and being given the opportunity to go see Margie.

I stayed silent in the passenger seat of the subtle sedan that Edward had grudgingly rented under his name. It had surprised me, when he drove around to where I'd been waiting for him and saw the black Lincoln.

"I'm never renting vehicles again." He muttered darkly, irritation clearly evident in his voice as he stared out into the shadows surrounding us.

I snickered without really thinking about it and shook my head slightly before turning my head to look at him. "The car isn't that slow, Edward."

"Yes it is." He huffed and shot me a dejected look before shifting in his seat.

I didn't even need to glance at the speedometer to know just how fast we were going. Everything was flying past us at a dizzying rate. But thanks to the stylish vehicle, the bumps and sometimes-uneven pavement was barely noticable. "We'll be home soon. Then you can hide me in your _baby_ and drive up to Alaska as fast as you want."

That got a grin! I laughed as soon as I saw it and even wiggled a little in my seat. He only answered by grabbing my hand and pulling it to his lips. "You do happen to have a very convincing arguement, Mrs. Cullen."

I laughed again and rolled my eyes, lacing my fingers through his a little more firmly. "I just know you better than the back of my hand, Mr_._ Cullen."

He chuckled and gave me my arm back. At least a little since our hands fell lightly onto my thigh and he shifted yet again in his seat. The car reacted instinctively and I rolled my eyes yet again.

"Lead foot."

The teasing and gentle ribbing continued until we pulled around to the back of the house. There was no room for the sedan in the large garage that the boys had renovated for their extensive collection of cars. Anticipation pooled in my veins as I easily vaulted out of the car and met Edward at the trunk of the car. He could see how anxious I was to get inside and see our family, but the teasing glimmer was still in his eyes as he pulled me up against him instead of letting me continue to the garage's exit.

Grimacing, I just stuck my tongue out at him as childishly as I could then pretended to pull away from him roughly. I had to work to keep from laughing so loudly that we were overhead as I yanked on his arm and actually got him to move. Edward stopped torturing me then and easily fell into step beside me as we trooped into the house. But just as I took the first step into our house, a new weight suddenly collided with my back.

"Houston!" Of course, it was Alice. I couldn't help but laugh as I stumbled a couple of steps in surprise then straightened back up to my full height. She lept agilely off my back and pecked both my cheeks quickly before throwing her arms around my neck. "It's not safe for you to be here, but I'm so glad you're home!"

"Thank you." I laughed again, breathless as I hugged my tiny sister and stepped back once she regained her footing. "Where is everyone?"

"Some of them are milling around the house, but Carlisle is at the hospital." Her perfect little face when stoic and I felt my own features mirror hers when the converastion suddenly shifted onto Margie.

It felt like a lump had lodged itself in my throat, which I cleared several times in vain. I couldn't speak. Even though words were right on the tip of my tongue, the invisible lump felt way too big for even air to move around.

"I take it you told everyone we were coming home?" Edward came to my rescue, taking the time to hug Alice before he lightly grabbed my arm and began to pull me with him. I focused on my feet as we walked through the house. When I stepped down from the kitchen landing, into the living room; I finally looked up to see our remaining family staring anxiously at us. I could tell, just by the looks on their faces that they thought me coming home was the worst idea I'd ever had.


	19. Chapter 19

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__Okay, out with the fluff and in with the action! It's gonna be slow-building and I'm honestly not sure what all is exactly going to happen next so please, just bare with me! Too many ideas for one story._

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius here. I just got inspired. Please review._

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**Chapter Nineteen:**

I had just found yet another thing that Alice Cullen was good for. Of course, I doubted anyone in my family failed at anything they attempted. But this was one area where her infallible talents made me love her more than envy her with every fiber of my being.

It had been Alice that suggested how I get into the hospital to check on Margie. She was still in the intensive care unit and unconscious from the accident. Of course, thanks to the crappy downside of luck, Derrick had barely been injured but was still being held because of some injuries deemed serious. I just had to remember that sneaking up behind him with the intense purpose of snapping his neck would do no one any good. Even though it would make me feel immensely better.

The reflection staring back at me in the mirror of Alice's bathroom looked nothing like the face I'd seen when I first woke up into this new life. A wig covered my long, dark brown hair perfectly; the cut very short and a deep shade of red. My eyes, which were finally starting to cool; would be hidden behind contacts. I just couldn't put those in until I was ready to face the outside world since the venom in my eyes would distintegrate them in a few hours' time. A couple sets of contacts would be hidden in my purse. Just in case. My skin was flawless and thanks to the power of heavy makeup; I looked like any normal, healthy human young woman. But the clothes, along with the bright red pixie wig were what stood out the most in contrast.

I'd been dressed in tight, black pants, heels, a fitted white tank top with a matching, black leather jacket waiting for me to put it on. A few necklaces hung around my neck, one a thin chain with a tiny silver heart pendant and the other a chunky black and blue beaded necklace that hung down to my stomach. Over all, I looked very differently than I ever had in my life. And of course, we were testing this new disguize on the person that knew me best; Edward.

"Really think he'll know it's not me?" I asked, skeptism heavy in my voice as I messed idly with the bright red strands curling around my ears. It felt a little uncomfortable to have all my hair piled underneath such a tiny wig, but it was a necessary evil.

"If he's not breathing, he'll have to search for some sort of clue. But the transformation altered your face and made your features more angular. You only marginally look like your former self now anyway."

"Gee, when you put it that way...." I joked darkly then sighed and rose to my full height. I wobbled a little thanks to the death-trap heels that Rosalie had picked out for me, but easily regained my sense of equilibrium. Rosalie had been in charge of the clothes, Alice had done everything else.

My tiny sister's bell-like laughter rang fluidly through my ears as we left the bathroom and headed downstairs; me loaded down with my bulky purse and jacket. Leave it to Alice to know all the latest fashion trends. Trends I couldn't, for the life of me, understand. Why did someone need such a monsterously big bag anyway? I'd gotten an answer to that pretty fast.

I stepped off the last stair and looked up quickly when I heard a rather obnoxiously loud wolf-whistle come from my left. Narrowing my eyes, I saw Emmett grinning smugly at me with his arm wound around Rose's shoulders. "Looking good, baby sis."

I rolled my eyes and laughed when Rose chose right then to smack him as hard as she could. It wouldn't hurt him, I knew that much for certain, but I still winced when I heard the crack of their granite skin collide. "Real mature, Emm." I snorted back another laugh then sighed and fell into my new role. The contacts were popped in and I glanced at a mirror long enough to be greeted by murky brown eyes. So far from the original green they'd once been.

"Everyone know what they're supposed to do?" Alice chirped as I mentally familiarized myself with all of the things I would need to do so that I kept up the facade of a human girl. If I could fool Edward, I would have no problem with the hospital staff that hadn't seen me since weeks before my human death.

Everyone nodded their answer right as the front door opened then quickly slammed back into the frame. Moment of truth!

Edward practically blew into the living room but stopped abruptly when he saw me sitting on the couch. I kept my eyes on the curved toe of my heels then lightly shook my head and glanced up at him. I wasn't allowed to say anything to him or it would ruin everything. My voice would be the one thing to betray me against my husband. Well, that and the wedding band I had adamantly refused to take off. "Who...?" He started then stopped as he leaned closer to squint at me. I kept my expression even, which was difficult given the varying range of amused expressions on our family's faces. Traitors!

"Houston?" He practically breathed and stepped closer. He stopped suddenly though when I stood up and the look on his face was absolutely priceless. I couldn't help myself and indulged in doing a quick spin before letting my hands slap against the thighs of my second-skin jeans.

"Whatcha think, baby?" I grinned cutely, feeling a strange sense of confidence with this new look. Maybe it was the hair, I wasn't sure. Either way, I couldn't help but toy with his head at least a little.

"I think..." Trailing off, Edward sighed unnecessarily then stepped forward quickly and pulled me to him. I didn't even have time to react to the hard kiss he pressed to my lips. It was over before my body caught on and I pouted instantly up at him.

"Tease." I muttered and jokingly shoved him away. A quick sheepish look was shot at him when he actually stumbled. Alice danced up beside me then with the bright smile still on her face.

"What do you think? Would anyone recognize her?"

"Definitely not." Edward shook his head slowly once he'd regained his footing then flicked his hand lightly at me. I saw the flash of silver clearly and raised my hand just in time to catch a small set of keys. Glancing up from them curiously, I just looked at Alice then back at my husband. "It'll be easier for you to remain inconsicuous if I'm not with you. Consider that a belated birthday present."

I was still looking at my hand curiously as Alice and Edward grabbed my arms and easily led me out to the garage. The same garage that we'd been unable to park in because of space. Now I knew why. The look on his face was beyond excitement as he unlocked the garage then stepped aside so that Alice could lead me in. I heard the footsteps of our family trailing behind us as she too stopped then waited for the next movement. Just as I found my husband's sparkling eyes, a new movement caught my attention and I whirled around to face the thing that belonged to my belated birthday set of keys.

"I cannot believe you got me a freakin' car!" I breathed, my eyes fixated intently on the glossy black finish practically mocking me. I'd thought Edward had been kidding during the handful of times he mentioned wanting to buy me a method of transportation. Well, a vehicle that went faster than the car I'd driven while in Margie's house. I didn't need to see the emblem to know what kind of car I was being given. The Cullens were known for their expensive taste in fast cars. But at least Edward had been kind enough to give me a car that I wouldn't be completely embarrassed by. The Lexus GX470 was, granted, insanely expensive; but a SUV I'd honestly dreamed of owning one day.

"You need a way to get back and forth around town." His breath blew across my ear in an inviting draft as he came up behind me. His hands locked on my hips and I struggled to reconstruct my expression into something a little less dumbstruck. In the back of my mind, I realized that this would be yet another thing that we would have to move when it came time to relocate. But then again, this family could do anything when they put their minds to it. I began to wonder what it would actually be like when that time came as I stepped up and carefully dragged my fingers across the flawless paint job that sparkled brightly in the limited garage light.

My fingers tightened unconsciously around the keys in my hand and I suddenly remembered the reason why I'd actually been given the keys. Margie. Anxiety gripped me suddenly and I noticed Jasper look away out the corner of my eye. "Sorry." I muttered, abruptly feeling bad for wrecking the good mood that had enveloped us as I was given my present.

"Are you sure you're going to be able to do this?" Edward asked suddenly, yet quietly. He was right at my ear again with his hands resting on my hips. Even though his question was vague, I knew exactly what he was referring to. The same fear that was lurking deep in the back of my mind. Was he right? _Would_ I be able to do this? Did I have enough strength to surround myself with humans when I'd barely had enough strength to resist the urge to kill someone that had been over a hundred miles away from me?

Swallowing thickly, dispite the fact that I actually didn't need to do so, I just shrugged unevenly and looked up at him. There was no sense denying or trying to hide the terror that went along with the fear in my mind. He would be able to see through it anyway. "I honestly don't know."

Alice, who had been silent up until this point, caught my eye and smiled warmly at me. "I don't see you having any problems. You'll be too distracted by Margie to notice the scents. And you can always hold your breath. I doubt anyone will be wanting an extensive conversation with you, dressed like that."

I laughed in spite of myself, the sound shaky and unfamiliar to me as I remembered the bright red wig and gothic-style clothing. Did I _really_ look so different that people's whole perception of me would change?

"Just go." Edward encouraged, kissing my temple as he lightly rubbed the small of my back. "Carlisle is waiting on you, we'll be here when you get home."

I nodded, feeling very much like a large lump had formed in my throat again. Alice disappeared long enough to grab my bag and jacket for me, setting them into the passenger seat as I slid in behind the wheel. "I'll be careful, I promise." I nodded once then leaned over long enough to kiss my husband before I carefully pulled the door closed and started the engine. It purred velvetly to life and I manuevered carefully out of the garage then headed for the hospital. Carlisle was waiting for me outside, just as Edward said; smiling gently at me as I stopped in front of him.

"Hello Houston." He greeted and smiled conspiritously at me then straightened up into his role as the hardest working doctor in Forks. "Ready?"

Gulping in a quick breath, I pulled the bag higher up on my shoulder and nodded. Once I had been reassured that the contacts hadn't dissolved in my eyes yet, I fell silent and followed my father into the hospital. Not saying a word, I just followed his lead as he led me through the process of getting back to where Margie had been placed. She still hadn't regained consciousness yet, my superior hearing confirmed as everyone spoke quietly behind me. My eyes darted quickly around the sterilzed surroundings and I sucked in a sharp breath when I saw the curtain that was hiding Margie's battered body from view. Discreetly touching Carlisle's arm, I stepped away from him, holding my breath the entire time as I intermingled with the humans. My focus was too set on my former foster mother for the intoxicating scent of human blood sent my throat into a firey tickle.

Carefully pulling the curtain back so I wouldn't rip it off the sparkling silver rings, I gasped loudly when I saw Margie for the very first time after my heart stopped.


	20. Chapter 20

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius here. I just got inspired. Please review._

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**Chapter Twenty:**

"Oh Margie," I breathed and practically fell into a chair that had been placed beside the hospital bed. It was one thing for me to remember this setting with me in the hospital bed; but to actually see Margie lying underneath the pastel blankets in a paper gown shattered my dead heart. Her face was mostly covered by gauze, blood staining the pristine white on either side of her mouth, under her nose, across her left cheek, and around the outside of her right eye. The most amount of blood came from her head. That was where her biggest injury was, I could tell just by looking at her.

But that wasn't the extent of her injuries. Both legs were encased in plaster and suspended in slings that hung from a large metal railing system. I meticulously scanned the rest of her tiny body, my eyes taking in every single cut and bruise that marred her skin. This wasn't right. Margie wasn't supposed to be laying in a hospital bed, fighting for her life just because she had trusted the wrong idiot. Derrick's well-being was only an afterthought.

As much as I wanted to reach out and touch her, I knew that I couldn't. My body temperature was as cold as the bodies laying in the morgue and I shuddered to think of the differences between my skin and hers. She was so...so breakable and fragile. I could only wonder how Edward had managed all of this during the worst of my illness.

The smallest hint of a noise suddenly assaulted my ears and I sucked in a quick, painful breath when a nurse suddenly appeared from behind the curtain to check on Margie. She faltered a little when she saw me, surprise clearly etched on my features. "Oh! I'm sorry, I didn't know anyone was in here."

"No problem." I whispered, afraid that my voice would startle her and dipped my head slightly. I didn't trust the contacts in my eyes to keep my secret and I remembered that avoiding gazes was something people in the grieving process often did.

"May I ask how you're related to Mrs. Banks?"

I shrugged as nonchalantly as I could and quickly looked up at her before averting my gaze to Margie. "I was one of her foster children. I was in the area when I heard of her accident."

"This must be very difficult for you." The nurse, who I discreetly noticed was named Lauren; reached out to touch my shoulder but seemed to think against it. Instead, she just stepped closer to the bed and began fiddling with the tubes that were connected to the large bruise that constituted as her arm.

"It is." I agreed quietly, forcing myself not to snicker when I realized that I probably sounded to her just like Edward did to me whenever he was trying to be sublte, yet persuasive. "I hope I'm not breaking any rules but I just wanted to come and see if she would be okay." I hinted, hoping that the tone of my voice would be enough to compel the woman to give me all of the details that Carlisle hadn't been able to yet. But, before Lauren could say anymore, Carlisle abruptly walked into the room. I could tell, just by the way he moved that he was in what I called 'doctor mode'.

Cutting my eyes back to Margie's motionless body, I bit down on my frozen lower lip and listened to every single word that was transpiring between doctor and nurse.

"Is there any change?" He asked quietly, doing his best to sound like he was trying to keep from being overhead. But he and I both knew better. I could hear every single word as if they were speaking at a normal volume.

"No. Some of her vitals are still stable, but she's still losing a lot of blood." I didn't need an added sense to know Carlisle cut his eyes to me when the word blood was mentioned. My breath was still held, a dull ache beginning to flood through my ribcage because of how much oxygen I'd expelled while speaking. I barely had enough air left so I was immensely thankful that no one seemed to remember my presence in the room.

"Thank you, Lauren." Carlisle spoke quietly and lightly patted her arm, being mindful to go for the part of her skin that was covered by brightly covered scrubs. The other woman left after that and he drifted to my side. The pretenses, though only slightly needed, were still in place. After all, we were in a hospital. People were known to burst in at any time. "I can't imagine how hard this must be for you."

"I'm fine." I replied quietly, my voice thick as I continued to stare at Margie. She had to be in massive amounts of pain, but yet the expression on her face remained unchanged. Undoubtedly because of the morphine flowing through her system and the glorious unconsciousness that still gripped her tightly. "Just be honest with me?" I asked quietly and suddenly looked up into the patient eyes of the head of our family. "Is there any hope of her waking up?"

"No." He sighed heavily and sounded very ancient as he touched my shoulder. My heart felt even more heavy with his statement, pretty sure that the stone would plummet into my stomach at any second. "There's too much damage to her brain. If she does wake up, she will be paralyzed for the rest of her life."

"And Derrick?" I struggled to keep the venom from my words, hatred beginning to coil uncorrupted through my veins. "When is he being released?"

"Tomorrow morning." Carlisle didn't miss a beat in softly responding to my questions. But a new, sudden expression crossed his features and he actually knelt beside my chair to catch my full attention. "Houston, promise me that you aren't going to do anything to Derrick. Let the law punish him for this."

"I won't do anything." I promised, knowing that Alice could already see me going back on that. Or at least, imagining all the ways I could go back on that. As much as I enjoyed the thought of ripping him limb from limb, I knew I wouldn't. The enjoyment that surfaced through these thoughts was like some insanely addictive drug and I instantly wanted more. I wanted to follow through with my thoughts, to see them unfold in action and watch as Derrick begged for mercy from the one thing he had never known existed. I took an involuntary deep breath and winced noticably when the scents that had been evading me since I walked into the hospital suddenly slammed into me. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before and I couldn't quite fight back the urges that were suddenly racing through me like adrenaline that had been set on fire.

Carlisle was easily able to recognize the changes in my demenor as I battled against the monster in my eyes for the very first time. The closest victim would be Margie, even though the snarling voice in the back of my head challenged the very thought. There was far better prey nearby, Margie was too weak to satiate the demon welling up inside me. "Let's get you out of here." He spoke quietly and guided me gently out of the chair.

I didn't even try to resist him as he pulled me out of the chair then led me out of the ICU. I didn't want to fight him on this, I didn't want to take any innocent lives and expose my family for what we really were. It helped a little, though marginally, that this was Carlisle's place of work and the risk of exposure weighed heavily on us both. His love of being a doctor ran so deeply that it already impacted every single move and decision I made. How could I rip away his dream in a moment of weakness? It wasn't a risk I was willing to take.

The air outside was fresh and thankfully clean of human blood and I drew in a large breath once I cleared the large, mechanical doors. Carlisle was right beside me, continuing to stare at me in concern as I pulled myself back together.

"Is it any easier?"

"Yes." I sighed in relief and looked up at him. "Thanks for getting me out quickly, I wasn't sure if I could hold it all together back there."

"You did beautifully, Houston." There was that warm smile I loved so much. The patient grin from a father that could see his children doing no wrong. "I honestly don't know how you're able to adjust so well."

"Practice?" I offered out helplessly. The answer to that question was still evading me and I was growing near desperate for answers. Not only to the subject of my abstience, but the strange glitch in my mind that still kept my thoughts a secret from Edward. There were still so many things in this life that were a mystery to me and I was almost sure I would eventually go mad before all of the pieces fit together. "I knew what to expect. Edward was very thorough every time we talked about my transformation."

Carlisle nodded at that and tried to glance at the hospital doors discreetly. I noticed though, and let my shoulders drop slightly. "I'm okay now Carlisle, I promise. You need to get back to work, I don't want to keep you any longer."

"You're fine." He soothed with another smile at me and patted my leather-clad arm. But when I saw him look away again for the second time, I shook my head and lightly pushed him toward the entrance. That seemed to give him the hint my words hadn't and he nodded agreeingly. "Okay, I know when I can't win."

I laughed lightly and jokingly rolled my eyes. "Please, I'm the least persuasive person in this family." Time wasn't on my side in that respect but I couldn't really think of that right then. "Go, I'm probably going to go back to the house and it will raise suspicion if you're seen with me."

Understanding dawned on him then, though I couldn't entirely be sure that Carlisle had been distracted enough to forget the part I was trying to play. His arm snaked around my shoulder quickly, the slightest amount of pressure applied, then he was gone. Staying where I was, I didn't move until I was sure he was inside and already halfway back to the ICU when my body and thoughts worked together to betray me. It was too quick for Alice to stop me and I couldn't even stop myself as I stomped back into the hospital in a blazing sense of determination. Air was locked in my chest once again, my sense of smell cut off as I slowly made my way to my new destination. Derrick's hospital room. Maybe putting some fear into him wouldn't be such a harmful thing....


	21. Chapter 21

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__I get ONE idea and BOOM! Inspiration hits. Hopefully it's about to get interestin'._

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius. I'm just a fan that got inspired. Please review!_

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**Chapter Twenty-One:**

I didn't have to worry about anyone coming in to speak to me as I stood at the foot of Derrick's bed. He was asleep, or probably just unconscious from pain medication; his features relaxed and serene. A look he didn't deserve. I took an unnecessary deep breath, hatred curling in my stomach along with the urge to lunge as his scent washed over me. It was probably the most vile thing I'd ever smelled in my life, but there was also the intense hatred to consider. Maybe that tainted scents and I'd just never realized it until this moment.

Either way, I let my throat burn as I walked around the edge of the bed to come up to his side. It would be so easy to take him out now. Just one little push against his throat and his windpipe would collapse. As enticing as the thought was, I kept my hands clenched into fists at my side. There were shallow cuts on his face, the largest one snaking from his temple to his jaw. Not nearly enough damage in my opinion.

I couldn't remember if I'd ever felt this malicious before in my human life, but I didn't care. Derrick didn't deserve any respect or sympathy from me. Not after everything he'd done to me, and now Margie. I couldn't keep her safe, I'd never been able to. I'd made peace with that back in her room when I said my silent goodbyes. But maybe...just _maybe_ there would be a way that I wouldn't need to be around in order to keep her out of his clutches.

Again, the thoughts of crushing his throat hit me and actually forced my body into action. Leaning over him with my upper body braced on the arm that had idly been slung over his chest to grip the other side of the bed; I tilted my head slightly as if examining some complicated puzzle. "Why should I let you live after all the damage you've caused?"

The words flowed freely past my lips and he actually twitched when my breath blew across his face. His eyes were slow in opening but when they focused on me, his eyelids disappeared more as they rounded into a near-perfect 'o'. "Wha...?"

"You're dreaming." I snapped quietly and cursed myself when it came out more menacing than I'd intended. As much as I _wanted_ to scare him, it hadn't actually been part of the plan. "You're still unconscious from the accident _you_ caused. If she dies, that blood will be on your hands."

My voice didn't register any familiarites in Derrick and it had been so long since he'd last seen me that I knew he wouldn't be able to put two and two together. He wouldn't know that Houston Cullen, a dangerous and suddenly ravenous vampire; was standing over him as she contemplated ending his life. He would have no idea how close he was coming to death, only to evade it because I'd been born into a merciful and compassionate family. I could see now how they had been unable to take human life in all these years. The urges and the strength to do so were very much there, lurking deep beneath the surface. But they were no match against the compelling drive to keep my family safe. To keep our secret and our existance a secret. I couldn't expose us to this man. A mere mortal that would try and bring everything crashing in around us.

Shoving away from the bed roughly, I didn't bother to hide the scowl from my features as I continued to stare down at him coldly. "When you get out of here, you should really consider leaving her alone. I may only be a dream, but I know how to reach you. I _will_ be watching."

The look of pure horror blanketed Derrick Lawson's voice in a vulnerable nakedness. There was no toughness to him now, nothing of what I had seen on the occasions he'd raised his hand to me. Occasions he would regret immensely if he didn't heed my disguized warning. I spun quickly on my heel and breezed out of the room. There was no longer any air left in my lungs, but I didn't care. Nothing could touch me right then or damper the high that seeing Derrick's face had created. I made it out of the hospital with no major mishaps, yet I didn't breathe again until I had safely locked myself up in the SUV of my dreams. I didn't think twice as my fingers flicked over the ignition to bring the vehicle to life. My foot was like lead against the pedal as I drove out of the parking lot and headed home. Now, if only I could scare the pants off Michael the way I'd been able to with Derrick, my family might once again know peace and quiet.

Edward was waiting for me when I got home, Alice not far from him. I didn't know where the others were, but it was apparent that they were choosing to stay hidden. As I climbed out of the Lexus and strode across the yard to the house, I tried to imagine what Alice had seen. No doubt, me crushing Derrick's throat and suffocating him. I'd been too focused on it for her to miss that. But had she seen other things? Like, for instance, me draining the rest of Margie's strength from her failing body.

"You okay?" My husband's voice was like melting honey as he reached me and pulled me into a tight hug.

I could only nod against his chest then pulled back enough to look up at him. "I wanted to, Edward. I wanted to crush his windpipe more than just about everything else I've wanted."

"But you didn't." He sighed and pulled me to him for yet another hug. I relaxed into the comfort and nodded. I didn't. I'd gone out into the human world, as a newborn vampire no less, and managed to not spill a single drop of blood. As if my freakish actions before this moment hadn't confused me enough, my head felt like it'd been thrown into an even bigger tailspin now that I was home and able to concentrate clearly on everything. "You have more restraint than we ever dreamed of for ourselves. I wish I could peek into your mind to see how you do it."

I laughed mirthlessly and extricated myself from him, only to take his hand and lead him inside. A quick wave was given to the few family members we saw on the way to our bedroom. But I didn't want to stop. The wig was more uncomfortable now and the contacts were just seconds from dissolving, I could feel. I wanted to be in _my_ clothes, with _my_ hair falling down my back.

Edward let me go once the door was closed behind us and I kicked the heels on my feet off carefully before disposing of the jacket that was merely a prop. The wig came off then and the ghost of a chuckle floated up from behind me. Turning around, I paused with my hand in the back of my hair while a curious expression overtook my features. "What's so funny?"

"Human blood doesn't bother you in the least, but yet dressed like that has you on edge."

I groaned and rolled my eyes, not needing to look as I launched the wig at my husband. I heard him catch it then set the wig aside as I yanked the tank top and jeans off. An audilble sigh passed my lips and my head fell back in relief once I'd tossed the jeans aside. Of course, now I was naked, but new clothes could wait. My skin was too busy relishing in the gentle waves of air for me to feel compelled to cover back up.

"Do you have any idea what you do to me?" Edward's voice would have surprised me if I hadn't heard the faint echo of his feet on the plush carpet beneath my own feet. I leaned my head back against him and snickered before whirling back around to face him effortlessly.

"Probably about as well as the idea you have of your effect on me." I grinned cutely up at him and pressed a light kiss to his lips then roughly pushed him away. "I gotta change, stop distracting me."

"Distracting _you_?!" He growled out in surprise, both eyes raised high against his forehead. I snickered at the look and shook my head as I reached out and grabbed a random pair of jeans. I was getting more familiar with the scents of certain fabrics now, so the dresser of clothes Alice had forced Edward to make room for didn't intimidate me nearly as much as it had the first time I was introduced to the inanimate beast. Yanking my jeans on, I had just reached for a top when my attention was diverted yet again. "I'll wait downstairs for you since I'm clearly not wanted up here." He teased, doing a spot-on impression of a wounded ego. "Meet me in the living room once you're ready? We need to start discussing our trip to Denali."

Yeah, as if my fragile self-esteem could take a hit from the perfection that was the Denali sisters.

It was probably childish in so many ways, but I took my sweet time getting downstairs. Once I had a fresh shirt on, I headed for the bathroom and washed the layers of makeup off my face. It surprised me a little how easily it all came off, but then again.... I no longer had pores, nothing to really fight with. The thought of a life without anymore pimples amused me to no end, so I snickered quietly to myself as I brushed out my long hair then flipped the light off carefully.

I knew what Edward was doing. It was painfully obvious that someone in the family, namely Alice, had gotten to him and told on me. I couldn't be entirely sure just how close I'd come to shattering everything our family had built up in Forks, but it had to be pretty close. I'd barely been able to remember _why_ it wasn't a good idea to rip Derrick's heart from his chest and savor every single, numbered heartbeat he had left.

The thoughts were still racing through my mind as I jumped off the last step carefully and bounded into the large dining room we only used for meetings such as this. Carlisle was home now, smiling at me gently as my bare feet slid over the slick, tile surface. I nearly crashed into the table in my overzealous move from _Risky Business_, but Edward's arm snared me at the right time and I quickly came to a stop.

"My bad. Brakes are out." I muttered sheepishly and shrugged. Esme, who I knew would have felt the worst if I broke her table apart, just snickered and shook her head at me. Okay, amusement was good. Amusement meant that the family wasn't going to gang up on me and tell me what a horrible idea it'd been to go back into the hospital after checking on Margie. "So let's have it!" I blurted out in a clear tone and let my hands slap against the thighs of my jeans. "Who wants to smack me for being stupid?"

"Houston." Edward's tone was reproachful as he glared at me. A glare that used to chill me to the bone whenever my heart still beat. Now I just saw it as kind of cute, and endearing. He never would stop caring about me and wanting to protect me from absolutely everything. But, and this had always been true in our relationship; there were just some things I had to face on my own. "No one's going to smack you for going back in to see Derrick."

"Snitch." I threw the word in Alice's general direction and almost snickered when I looked around in time to see her sticking her tongue out at me.

"You came close, Houston." She was so smug! Well, I probably would be too if I had her abilities.

"I wasn't going to do anything!" I shot out. For some reason, I couldn't fully push down the fear that I had to defend myself to everyone in the room. And I mean _everyone_. No one had been exempt from this little pow-wow. "Yeah, okay, I really, _really_ wanted to but I didn't! I should so get some brownie points for that."

"Margie's not going to get any better." Carlisle's voice did the trick. As soon as he said those words, the joking little defence I'd come up with in the bathroom crumbled around my bare feet. Of course he would bring Margie into the situation. But I was willing to bet that I'd been closer to killing Derrick than I had Margie.

"Which means...?" Trailing off, I just waved my hands slightly for him to continue. When he didn't, I sighed and let my head fall back again. "You guys think I need to disappear again because Michael still hasn't gone away yet."

"Exactly...wait." That pulled Carlisle up short. Apparently it'd been a while since the last visit from the biological disease that wouldn't go away. "We're not considering Michael in this yet."

"Yet." I pointed out then shrugged unevenly and gestured toward the front door. "But I can smell him. He's about to walk onto the porch and knock on the door. And I'm pretty sure we're still decided on me being neither seen nor heard. So I'll just go pack." Nodding once, I twirled around on my feet and strode out of the room. I wasn't sure if Edward was going to follow me or stay with his family. And I didn't really care.

After all, I'd made a promise. I wasn't going to cause any trouble for Edward since he had agreed to us coming back. And Margie really wasn't getting any better. But once I hit the threshold of my and Edward's room, my plans changed. It wasn't enough to give Alice any real forewarning, unless she was cheating and honing on me moreso than normal.

In any event, I threw my shoes on and made my way to the library. I remembered seeing Edward being able to leave that way and was suddenly grateful that the library wasn't on the first floor. Where someone could see me and possibly stop me. Once I reached my destination, I threw a guilty look over my shoulder then launched my body out into the darkness that cloaked the back yard.


	22. Chapter 22

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__Hope all Americans had a great Thanksgiving! And for those that didn't celebrate, hope you had a great Thursday! Here's another chapter for you guys._

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius, I'm just a fan that got hit by the inspiration stick. Please review!_

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**Chapter Twenty-Two:**

I wasn't entirely sure where I was going, or what was compelling me to keep moving. Countless times since I'd left the house, I considered turning around and going back. But Michael was there, I'd been able to hear his voice mix in with my family's when I rounded the house to get back to the hospital. There were so many things to worry about now, and I was unconsciously adding more on than I should've.

I knew that Edward would be mad, beyond furious actually, when he came back upstairs and found me gone. But this was something I had to do. It couldn't be explained, I couldn't find the logic I needed to properly tell my husband why I couldn't shake the intense urge to strike out on my own. Even though it was dangerous, moreso for my family than myself, I still couldn't compromise with myself. I had to make things right. I had to do everything I needed before leaving Forks for the trip to Denali.

My first destination was the hospital. It was past visiting hours and I didn't have the disguize that I'd been wearing earlier in the day. But I knew the layout of the hospital well enough to get up to Margie's floor without anyone seeing me. Edward had been so confident and persuasive in the moments when he was seeking out something he really wanted. Maybe I could do it too. Granted I didn't have the experience that he did, but we were supposed to be appealing to our prey. It was embedded in the DNA that made us vampires. Even though I didn't really consider the hospital personel as 'prey', I still assumed that I could try out these abilities on them. It was the only way I could do what I needed.

Margie's section of the ICU was dark and empty when I finally emerged from around the pastel curtain. She was just as I'd left her before, laying motionless in bed with her chest rising and falling repetively with the help of the respirator they'd put her on. Pain flashed through every single cell of my body as I reached out and tentatively took her hand. I'd already stopped breathing and hadn't needed to converse with anyone on my way up. Which was good. I would need every single breath in my chest to get this out.

"Margie," I sighed as I fell against the side of her bed. She didn't respond to my cold touch and I wondered if her mind was even able to register the chilling temperature. Had I been able to when Edward touched me while I lay still during a moment of unconsciousness? "I'm so sorry." I rushed out, having to work to keep my voice from rising as my words became agonized. "I never wanted any of this for you, and you don't deserve any of it. You're the best foster parent I've ever had and I will never be able to repay you for bringing me into your life. If it weren't for you...bringing me to Forks, I never would have met the rest of my life. I never would've been able to free myself of the bonds you hated so much. I know you did everything you could and I know that there's still so much you wish you could've given me. But I swear to you, I promise that I'm in a better place. I'm in that happy life you envisioned for me so many times over while I was sick. I don't hate you and I never could if you decide to give up right now. I know it hurts, _believe_ me when I say I know pain. But if you can't come back from this, I want you to have the peace of mind in knowing that I'm okay. I don't know if you can hear me, and I know you probably think I'm still dead but...." Words failed me then. I hadn't been prepared for everything that came tumbling out of my mouth. How could I? None of my thoughts, even with the excess amount of room in my head, were confused and tangled so impossibly into one another. But I'd said everything that I had wanted to. Hopefully Margie could go into the afterlife with the peace of mind I was risking everything to give her. She deserved to know that she had made things so much better for me just by letting me get to know her.

I glanced up at the heart monitor that was attached beside her bed, even though I didn't need it to monitor her heartbeats. I could hear the faint thrumming within her chest, working hard to keep blood pumping throughout her broken body. But when I heard the one sound I'd never wanted to hear, a strangled sob escaped my lips. It was a sound I knew so well. That last, final gallop into silence. She seemed to hear me somehow, though I couldn't be sure how it was all working, and was giving up.

As much as I wanted to stay with her, holding her hand while her body completed the process of shutting down, I made a hasty exit when the monitor attached to her began to flatline. The doctors on call wouldn't get to her in time. I couldn't hear her heart beating as I streaked through the hallway and out into the stairwell. A stairwell that only hospital personel was supposed to use. I didn't think as I took the same path that had carried me inside, out. Air hit me like a brick and I was sure I would've been crying by now if my body still had that option. I didn't even attempt to move at my normal pace as I made my way back to the fringe of trees that shrouded the section of the hospital I'd come out of. But a flash of movement caught my eye and I took off into a run before I could even think to initiate the action.

Tree branches slapped at my cheeks as I broke through the section where I'd seen the burst of movement. A couple of steps further into the trees and I heard new sounds. Not just the wildlife surrounding us, which was quieter now than when I'd come through moments before. But now they were accompanied by the hurried thumps of a heartbeat. Whoever it was out here, was scared. And not alone.

My nose wrinkled a little as I slinked closer to the source of the heartbeat. I could tell the owner was human and cut off air to my lungs in hopes of keeping my resolve. What good would it do now to break my record? But blood became the last thing on my mind when I finally saw what had caught my attention just moments before.

There was a man and woman standing in a small clearing. The woman, with clear terror written on her features, was pinned against the tree with the man leaning over her. He was clearly taller and more built than she was, his clothes torn and ragged from what I could only guess was months of traveling. The woman, I recognized with a start, wore brightly colored hospital scrubs. And she looked familiar. Not familiar to my vampire eyes, but my human eyes. It was a nurse that had taken care of me right after my back-to-back surgeries. As much as I wanted to just streak over and break them up, I had to be absolutely sure about what I was seeing.

That certainty flashed through my mind when I recognized the man's change of posture as he began to lean in toward her throat. I only heard one heartbeat and the scent coiling in the air reminded me of the scents of my family. Immortal. A growl built up easily in my chest as I stepped out of the shadow I'd clung to and intentionally made noise to draw the male vampire's attention away from his victim. My family and I weren't the only vampires in existance, I knew that. We also weren't the only ones in the world that obstained from human blood. But did that really mean that I could just stand by, moments after watching Margie let go, and let one of my own kind take a human life? A human life that had been spent, no matter how short the period, taking care of me.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." I growled out, my pitch rising just enough so that the vampire could hear me, but the human woman couldn't. Her expression grew even more befuddled when her companion suddenly leaned away from her and locked eyes with me. I didn't need a spotlight to see what color his eyes were. They were deep burgandy, the same color as mine but more brilliant in the limited source of light. He wasn't like my family. The color of his eyes told the story of his dietary habits. A nomad had come into the Cullens' territory and threatened our existance.

"Who's going to stop me?" His voice was calm, yet rough and coarse as he pushed away from the tree he'd been leaning against and turned his back on his victim. She remained frozen against the tree, her tear-filled eyes darting back and forth between me and the man standing in front of her. Or who she _thought_ was a man.

I just shrugged in response and took a couple more steps toward the woman, making a small arch toward her so that I could wedge myself between her and the nomad in a second's notice. I took in a deep breath, to familiarize myself with her scent, and my throat ripped to flames accordingly. She wasn't going to die tonight though. Not by my hands or by the hands of another. "You're trespassing." I admitted, honestly not even sure if I was doing this the right way. I'd never been much of a savior before, I'd always been the one being saved. It felt oddly powerful now, to have the roles reversed. To now be the one with the ability to impact the possible outcome. "I can't let you do what you're undoubtedly wanting to. It'll bring too much exposure and we can't have that."

"Exposure?" A bushy eyebrow arched crookedly over his burgandy eyes as his body slipped from the slight crouch he'd unknowingly fallen into. It could've been a ruse, I'd heard enough horror stories from Jasper to expect anything when face to face with another of my kind. So I didn't dare let my muscles relax as I inched even closer to the woman.

"Yes, exposure." I replied evenly, knowing that I was probably confusing this woman even more with how my voice sounded. I was just glad that I no longer looked anything like the young woman she'd nursed. "Let her get back to work and I'll gladly tell you all about it."

The nomad, whose name I didn't really want or care to learn, took a second to think about this. I could practically see the wheels turning in his head as he glanced from me, to the woman, then back again. "Very well." He allowed with a small nod and even took a step back so that I could position myself even more securely between them.

No one, but maybe Alice, could have predicted what happened next. One minute the nomad was letting her go and the next, snarls pierced through the air and the woman shrieked.

"Run!" I shouted and launched myself at the vampire when he sprang at her. Our bodies collided painfully, granite skidding against granite, but I could still hear the woman tearing through the trees, sobbing her eyes out with her heart hammering violently in her chest. Here was to hoping the woman just went back saying that some woman just saved her from a would-be rapist. A deep corner of my mind held onto the idea of talking to Carlisle about it. But first, I had to get away from the nomad I'd encountered.

His speed and strength was no match against mine as we began to fight. Snarls were still shattering the silence around us, our collisions echoing like a rock avalanche as we shoved each other into trees and various other bushes and natural debris. I managed to escape a badly-timed chokehold and sprinted even further into the woods. This was my only shot. I could tear the vampire apart, limb from limb. There'd been no doubt about that as my strength ran undiluted through my veins. But I had nothing to torch him with. Dismemberment was nothing without the burning flames to turn him to ash.

I tried to take as long of a detour as I could back to the house, doubling back several times in case the vampire was hot on my heels. But when a minute, then five, and later ten, passed with no presence of the nomad, I darted into the house and launched myself up onto the second floor window. Michael was still here, I could smell it. But maybe, just _maybe_ I could find someone and alert them to the new complications. I'd just exposed us all and I had no idea how bad things were about to get.

Edward was waiting for me when I got to our bedroom. He didn't even bother to keep the anger from his features as he roughly pulled me into the room and slammed the door shut behind me. "Do you have any _idea_...?!"

"Yell later." I hissed and grabbed his arm. I forgot to measure my strength and winced when he flinched away from me. "Sorry!" I muttered and flailed my arms slightly before I took a couple of steps to stand in front of him again. "Listen, I know what I did was wrong, but I'm not going to apologize for it. I had to say goodbye to Margie and, really, it's a good thing I did."

"How is risking yourself a good thing?!" He was still snarling in fury, his dark golden eyes burning into me.

"Because there's a nomad in the area." I blurted out without a second thought, my hand hovering over his arm. Right as the words flew past my lips, the door to our room flew open and several shadows obstructed the entryway.

"What's going on in here?" Carlisle burst through the crowd at the door and crossed the room in three, long strides before coming to a stop beside Edward and me. Even though he looked calm and collected, I could see a hint of concern and maybe anger dwelling in his eyes. Two things I never wanted to see swimming in his eyes.

"Houston went back for Derrick." Edward seethed, obviously only having part of the story. Part of which was wrong. Alice had seen me going back to the hospital, but not to say goodbye to Margie. My intial course had been for the man that put her in the hospital, but at the last second; I'd changed my mind to go visit my foster mother one last time.

"I did not." I blurted out in shock and stared up at him with unconcealed pain. It hurt to hear his accusation, as if he was repulsed by the idea of me having even half a moment of weakness. It repulsed me too, but this was one thing I'd never wanted to bring to light. And I had. Undoubtedly. "I went back to say my goodbyes to Margie." I rushed out, bodily turning to face the head of our family. Edward continued to growl angrily, the hostility rolling off him in waves; but I had to ignore it. I had to tell Carlisle everything that I'd witnessed so that we could all act accordingly. "I didn't mean to expose us or even _risk_ it, but I couldn't wait any longer. She died right before I left the room, but that's not what's important right now." I could grieve for Margie later, when everything was out in the open and proper precautions and strategies were in place. "When I left, I saw two people going into the woods surrounding the hospital. Carlisle, there's another vampire in Forks and he almost killed one of my old nurses. If I hadn't stepped in...."

The sigh that emitted from the oldest Cullen's lips chilled me to the very bone. I didn't think it was even possible, but I felt even colder right then than my body temperature could ever achieve. "What happened when you stepped in, Houston?"

"I managed to get her to escape. She might just think that she got hideously lucky and was saved from some would-be rapist. I tried to keep her from seeing as much as possible, but I can't be certain of how much she saw. He attacked me before I could clearly get her out of the woods and out of earshot. We fought, of course, but he's still out there. I couldn't take him down properly."

"Does he know that we're here?" I jumped a little in surprise when Esme ghosted into the room and asked that question before anyone else could.

"I only used singular terms, but I did mention that he was risking exposure by hunting in town. It all happened so fast." I sighed then, my shoulders dropping as the full effects of my actions hit me. It was like a tidal wave, crashing in around me and threatening to pull me beneath the surface. I was sure that, were I still human, I would have collapsed right then and there.

But my body stayed upright as everyone began to move and speak at once. What was the best way to deal with this killer without the risk of exposing us all? Would we be able to even think about staying in Forks for a little while longer? The Cullens were already risking exposure by having remained here as long as they had, and I knew that the reason they had yet to actually move on was because of me. I'd impeeded their usual plans and brought something so horrific down on us that I wasn't even sure if things _could_ go back to normal after this.


	23. Chapter 23

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE: **__After a small battle with Writer's Block, I come baring a new chapter! __I wasn't entirely sure if I was going to take this kind of direction, but after some careful consideration, and a review; I decided to go ahead and do so. Things will be ironed out in the next chapter. So in the meantime please bare with me, things are probably getting confusing and chaotic. Things are starting to wind down though, I'm not sure how many more chapters are left._

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius, I'm just having some fun. __**Please review!**_

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**Chapter Twenty-Three:**

The sun was surprisingly bright as I stood hidden under the shadows of a large group of trees. I knew that it was a major risk, to be out in public on a rare day of sunshine in Forks. But I had been compelled, almost consumed by the dire need to be here.

Margie's body was being lowered into the ground just ten feet away from me. Even with the additional space that I refused to encroach on, I could see everything perfectly. There was a small cluster of mourners facing the lowering coffin, a large mound of dirt on the other side waiting to be compacted over my former foster mother for the rest of eternity. The minister, who had actually presided over my wedding to Edward, had only spoken briefly about Margie's life and I was surprised to learn some new things about the woman that had brought me to my destiny.

I couldn't help but flinch when I heard the muted thud of the coffin meeting the open concrete box that would protect Margie's body from the elements. Then it was all over. The small group began to dispurse, but before I could turn and make the short trek back to my car; a familiar shadow was thrown over my hiding place.

"I knew I'd find you here." Alice's voice was soft as she came up beside me and wrapped her arms around my waist. I folded one arm over her shoulders and sighed heavily as I nodded.

"It felt wrong not to be, you know?" I asked quietly, almost as if I were asking for some sort of permission. I didn't want anyone in my family to be mad that I was taking risks like this, but the light breeze diluted the scent of human blood enough that I didn't feel the slightest inkling to attack any of the mourners. Even if my eyes were darkening with my growing thirst.

"You don't need to explain anything to me." She whispered, even though there was no chance our voices would carry to the small gathering still feet away from us.

I nodded and tried, in vain, to clear the invisible lump that had formed in my throat. "Does Edward know I'm here?"

"Yes."

I sighed and let my head fall back in momentary exasperation. My husband was going to be furious with me, I could see it now. He had never liked me taking chances and I was almost certain that was something that would never change. Yet, I offered no resistance when she suggested we go ahead and get home. I couldn't stay away from the house forever, no matter how enticing the thought sounded right then.

Of course, Alice was silent and offered no insight to what I might face when I walked through the front door. She just sat silently in the passenger seat of my car, which I still couldn't believe was actually _mine._ Nothing felt entirely real to me anymore, but then again, I couldn't remember the last time my life had existed entirely in reality.

My movements were intentionally slow as I parked in the garage beside Edward's Volvo and pulled the key from the ignition. "Is he gonna be mad?" I muttered, in spite of myself, looking sideways at my sister-in-law.

A quiet, bell-like chuckle resonated through her throat before her eyes suddenly glazed over and she went still. All movements that I knew as well as my own body's actions. She snapped out of her daze rather quickly then smiled brightly over at me. "He'll be more worried than anything."

"Worried?" I asked blankly, staring at her like she was growing another head. "But I'm fine."

"He's not worried _about_ you. He's worried because of you. Edward can't see what your reaction will be."

"My reaction to what?" This time I was _really_ looking at her like she was some sort of alien. But of course, I got no answer. She just bounced out of the SUV and danced inside, leaving me in a complete daze. What could possibly be waiting for me inside the house and _why_ was he worried because of me?! Shaking my head, I just sighed and shook my head then stepped into the house. Almost as soon as I cleared the living room, I stopped short.

Okay, I could see why Edward would have been worried about my reactions. There, in the center of the pale living room, standing between the facing rows of couches, were the devestatingly beautiful Denali clan. My cousins-in-law.

"What's going on?" I asked quietly, forcing myself not to wince when I heard the changes in my tone. I sounded so different now than I had just minutes before while talking to Alice.

"Houston!" Tanya, who I easily recognized from my wedding day memories, stepped forward and embraced me quickly. "You look even more lovely than the last time we saw you!"

"Thanks." I muttered, sure that my cheeks would be burning if not for my frozen body. Edward drifted to my side as Tanya stepped back, his breath cool against my ear as his hand slid across the small of my back. "You're just as gorgeous as ever."

The ghost of a chuckle hit my ears but I didn't think to figure out who it had come from. My best guess was my tense husband. I still didn't know everything about the Cullens' past with the Denali sisters, but I could tell there there were some things Edward didn't exactly want me to know. My suspicions raised about half an inch higher when Tanya stepped forward again and hugged Edward, who looked more than a little awkward given the fact that he still had one arm securely wrapped around my back.

"What brings you all here?" Carlisle spoke up, his voice laced thoroughly with happy surprise as he crossed the room toward the sisters, Carmen and Eleazar. I quickly began to wrack my brain for the memories I needed that would put all the pieces I needed together. But there was too much going on, way too many things to focus on that I couldn't exactly zero in on one particular thing. Margie was dead, Derrick was released and awaiting trial, and there was a vampire in Forks that was all too happy to spill human blood. Oh! Not to mention the fact that my biological father was still trying to squeeze as much money as he could from my family.

Abruptly it all became too much and my fingers flew to my temples in hopes of massaging the sudden pressure away. My stone body suddenly didn't feel so invincible. Edward caught me when I began to double over, murmering quietly over my head before he gently steered me toward the staircase. I forgot about the sudden, invisible pressure in my head long enough to race up to our room, breathing a small sigh of relief when the bedroom door closed behind him.

"Houston, talk to me." Edward commanded gently as he gripped my arms and bodily turned me around to face him.

I sighed and once again, let my head fall back as a hand came up to slap across my forehead. "It's getting to be too much, Edward." I sighed and straightened up long enough to look at him clearly. "I thought we were supposed to be going to Alaska, not them coming to us."

"It was a surprise." He whispered, his knees bending enough that he could look straight into my eyes. "Carlisle contacted them about the nomadic vampire you ran into and...well, there are some other complications arising."

"Great." I snorted out a small laugh and turned away with my fingers still flat across my forehead. "What else could _possibly_ be happening now?"

"More bodies are disappearing than we originally anticipated." He started, not making a single move to face me as he stood rooted in place. "We're not entirely sure what's going on here and the Denali clan has come to help us out."

"What could possibly be out there besides what we already know?" I shot out and whirled around to face him. Hair flew over my shoulder and I suddenly remembered how I was dressed. A black wool dress that covered as much of my cold skin as possible. Frowning suddenly in frustration, I turned and stalked over to the closet. The dress was tossed onto the floor and by the time I had pulled on a flannel shirt and pair of jeans; I all but forget about the sound lashing Alice would give me when she found out how carelessly I was treating her fashion choices.

Edward sighed then and pulled me back toward him once I was redressed with my hair piled messily atop my head. "There are things we didn't tell you when you became part of this family. And that's on me, Houston. I didn't want to overload you and give you even more to think about while you were dying. But those things...personal history that I kept from you is coming back to bite us and we have to address this if we want everything to calm down and go back to normal."

"I feel like I need to sit down." I muttered sarcastically, shaking my head slowly before letting it drop against his chest. My arms seemed to have a mind of their own as they wound around his waist, pulling us even closer as I waited tensely for my husband to go on.

"We've been in this area before, Houston; about seventy years ago. When we were here the first time, a treaty was struck between Carlisle and the leader of a Native American tribe down in La Push."

La Push. I vaguely remembered Margie mentioning that area when we briefly considered going to the beach for a day. It had been right after I first moved to Forks and knew nothing of the clandestine world I had been about to enter. The expression on my face must have changed because Edward stopped to watch me carefully. Swallowing thickly, I just nodded slowly and motioned for him to continue. He did and air hitched in my throat as I took in every single word he said next.

"This tribe had a genetic mutation, one that turned them into werewolves. I don't know all of their legends, though at times I wish I did, but basically they have gone through the centuries as our sworn enemy. If it weren't for Carlisle promising that we would cause no harm on their lands, we would have had a war right then and there. But in that treaty, we expressely promised that we would not bite or kill another human ever again. No matter if this happened on their land or not. There were boundary lines set up that prevented us from coming too close to their families, which we have honored to the best of our ability. But I guess when we came back, we sparked this gene up again and a new, larger pack has come together as a result."

"Wait," I muttered and looked up at him sharply. "You said the treaty covered biting, that means..." Blowing out a low breath, I just shook my head and suddenly jerked away from him. "I voided the treaty when you changed me."

"Yes," He sighed and hung his head as his hands closed around mine gently. "And they think the nomad is with us. The leader came by while you were gone to see just how much damage we've done to the treaty. It's just a matter of time before they attack."


	24. Chapter 24

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE**__: Two new chapters for your reading pleasure. With the holidays, another bout of Writer's Block, and my starting a new story; the chapters have been kind of slow in forming. Plus I finally now have the time I want to dedicate to writing. Anyway! Enough from me, enjoy the new chapters and I promise, things are starting to pick up. Won't be long now and thanks so much for being patient with me._

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius; I'm just the geek that got bored. PLEASE REVIEW! They help with the creative flow._

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**Chapter Twenty-Four:**

I needed a break. Something that would take my mind off the flurry of events surrounding my family. It was still a little too much to completely take in, but I was doing my best. At least now, one thing had been taken off my list of worries. Derrick had been charged with vehicular manslaughter and currently awaiting trial. That was the only reason he was still breathing. Well, that and the fact that it was pretty damn difficult to break into jail! I doubted anyone had ever tried to but various members of my family had convinced me of the downfalls in that plan.

But I didn't let any of that touch me as I moved around the spacious backyard. The sun was still shining but I paid my sparkling skin no attention. Tiny earbud speakers had been shoved into my ears and were feeding every single upbeat song I'd meticulously loaded into the iPod strapped against my left bicep. It had been so long since I'd last danced that, at first, I'd been afraid I wouldn't remember any of my training. But it was almost as if my muscles had a mind of their own. My hips swayed perfectly with the flowing beats, my feet gently pounding into the grass beneath my bare feet in an amazing syncronization. The thing that pleased me the most as I continued to sway and let my long hair fly around in the breeze was that none of this took any thought at all. It was as effortless as breathing had been during my human days. As effortless as expressing my love for my husband. I could remember, with vivid clarity, how much of an escape dance had been. But my passion for it had been lost when I had to bury my mother.

But now...now that passion seemed to return to me over ten-fold. I couldn't get tired in my new body. I couldn't sweat or show any physical signs of exhaustion. I could dance to my heart's content and never have to worry about a single breath I expelled from my lungs.

The song had just switched to a new track by P!nk when something suddenly broke through the pulsing guitar chords. Whirling around and pulling the earbuds from my ears in one motion, I relaxed instantly when I noticed Edward's eyes on me. We hadn't talked much since he decided to spring new information on me about the ancient treaty that bound his family to such strict orders. I had yet to actually see the leader of this werewolf pack, but it was only a matter of time before that was resolved.

The Denali sisters were also still staying with us, which wasn't as uncomfortable as I'd originally assumed it would. No one slept so there was really no bedding issue to consider. Their feeding habits were almost the exact same as ours so again, no possible turbulance there either. But there was something that I couldn't quite shake. Some hidden piece of information that no one was giving me. I'd tried, several times with no success, to pry the information from Edward. But he was just as stubborn as I was when he wanted to be. And that was quite often now with all of the heightened sense of awareness around us. A couple more bodies had shown up in Port Angeles and it was making surrounding law enforcement extremely antsy. Not that I could really blame them.

"Enjoy the show?" I sighed, a small smile on my face as I ran a hand through the hair on top of my head. I still couldn't believe how long my hair had gotten by the time of my transformation. The length it would forever stay with since my body was forever frozen on the cusp of eighteen. Never growing, never changing. Not that those two things had ever really been in my human future to begin with. But now I had to deal with the fact that saving my life had put my entire family's existance in danger. A risk I wasn't sure I would have been willing to take if I'd known about it back when I was still human.

"Immensely." My favorite smile graced my husband's features as he glided forward and loosely wrapped an arm around my waist. Once he had my iPod muted, grimacing of course at my taste in music, he brushed a kiss across my forehead then looked at me. I knew the look on his face well, it was one I'd been seeing a lot since everything began to cave in around us. "I've always wanted to see you dance."

"Well now you can say that you have." I nodded once and reached up with my unbounded arm to wrap it around his shoulders.

A low chuckle passed his lips before they met mine in a simple kiss. He looked much too serious for any hope of our actions getting the better of us. It seemed the honeymooning stage of our marriage was now long gone. "Have you rethought your decision to stop dancing? It might give you the outlet you sorely need."

"Because everyone else in the family has an outlet." I muttered then laughed darkly at the sudden thoughts of the world's first vampire prima ballerina. Yeah, talk about a weird concept.

The corners of Edward's lips curled as I finished his unspoken sentence. I didn't need his gift of mind-reading to know what he was getting at. But he was right. I was pretty much the only one in the family now that didn't have a way of passing the hours I used to spend sleeping. There was no such thing as unconsciousness for me anymore, nothing for me to hide in so that I could escape the trails of the day. But then again, I wasn't entirely sure I'd ever had that in my human life before. The pain, when my body began to shut down, had always been there. It was always waiting for me to regain consciousness, it was just something I could not escape.

"Okay," I sighed with a small nod, which looked odd considering my forehead still rested against my husband's lean chest. "I'll reconsider this whole dancing thing."

"That's my girl." An undercurrent of laughter filled Edward's voice for the first time in a very long time as he wrapped his arms around my shoulder. I smiled lightly when his lips brushed over my hair, but the moment didn't last. The one thing I'd come out here to avoid hit me once again and I sighed in spite of myself.

"Edward, I want to go see the pack leader."

I could easily feel his muscles lock down as a low hiss passed between his clenched teeth. "Absolutely not." His hands felt like rock against the small of my back, the fabric of my shirt giving ever so slightly under the strain of his fingers. "It's too dangerous, Houston."

"No it's not." I sighed and pulled away from him abruptly. Once my weight resettled, I blinked in surprise to find myself a good foot away from Edward. His arms were still curved around the space I'd just been standing in, his fingers still clenched. The wind picked up just then and I sighed when I mentally took in the new hole in my shirt. Kinda ironic, I'd actually _liked_ this one. "Edward, I'm not the same girl you first met. When are you going to realize that?"

"I know all-too-well what you're like now." He advanced on me easily and gripped my shoulders with no hesitation. Bending his knees slightly, he met my gaze evenly; something he always did when he was trying to convey something important to me. Or we were fighting. "Houston, you're still a newborn vampire. Even though you've been able to contain your thirst thus far, who's to say that it will still hold while you go face off with a bunch of humans?"

"But you called them werewolves." I challenged suddenly, keeping my voice evened in my determination to win this. I _had _to go to La Push, or as far in as I could go and explain my side of things. I knew it was probably useless, declaring that my life had been saved because of what Edward was, and that it probably wouldn't have any baring on the treaty that was now void. Void because I still existed. "So they can't be entirely human." I finished and sighed, reaching up to gently grab his forearms. "Edward, the treaty was broken when you made me. When you saved _my_ life. How can you expect me to just stand here and be okay with that?"

"What would you have wanted me to do? Tell you that your choice was going to incite a war? And we can't forget that I'm the one that presented the idea of immortality to you, not the other way around."

"Oh, don't." I snapped and flinched away from him. His arms fell to his sides at once, but I was suddenly too filled with rage to turn back around to face him. As much as I loved, actually worshipped and adored probably fit better; my husband, he had the crazy quirk to take everything on himself. It drove me nuts, especially when the blame was supposed to reside on my shoulders. I wasn't weak anymore, by any means, and it was time I started acting like an equal part of this family. I refused to hide out any longer. It just wasn't worth it now. I couldn't keep letting my family take the fall for me. I wouldn't be able to walk out into the public world for a very long time, but surely that didn't mean the supernatural world was off-limits to me too? "Don't stand there and blame this all on yourself. You had a choice." I muttered the last part out and eventually pivoted around to face him once more. "Granted it wasn't a very good choice, but I would have come to you about changing anyway. You just beat me to it. And, if you wanna get technical, we're _all_ to blame for breaking the treaty! I didn't back down and no one in our family stopped you from following through on this decision."

"Is that what you would have wanted?" For the very first time since seeing Edward for the very first time, I got a real glimpse at the monster that lurked behind his golden eyes. The same monster that lurked behind my amber eyes; but for some reason, it was scarier to see my husband in this light. Centuries of self-loathing and denying his very nature seemed to craft him into an even more dangerous and deadly being than I could ever hope to become. He was quick to advance on me, gripping my arms so tightly that I was sure the bones would easily snap if I'd been in my human form. "Would you have willingly sacrificed yourself, sacrificed _me_ in the process, just to keep a treaty you knew nothing about?"

"Yes." My response came out in a breathless whisper as I stared into the angry pools of black fire swirling around equally dark irises. "I would have tried my hardest to keep my death from taking a toll on your family. I would have never wanted to bring something like this down on you. On our family! Edward, why couldn't you just tell me?"

Anger fueled even the smallest flexes of muscle as he sharply pulled away from me and walked toward the edge of the river. My dead heart suddenly began to ache as his back turned on me, the ripples in his hidden skin evident from even the widest of distances. "I honestly never thought I would see the day when you became so much stronger than you've always been to me."

Confusion easily rippled across my features as I crossed the distance and stopped at his side. My fingers twitched and my arm rose up toward my chest in a feeble attempt to reach out and touch him. Instead, my muscles relented and my arm fell back to my side as I gazed at the water swirling languidly away from us. "What're you talking about?"

He turned then, at my question and I could see the pain just as clearly as I'd seen the anger swirling in his eyes. He finally reached out to touch me, gently pushing hair behind my ear before tracing his fingers down my cheekbone. "I've wondered, mainly when our relationship was new and we were learning about one another. I thought about how things would have been without your illness crippling you and I worried that, maybe you wouldn't have needed me as much if you hadn't been sick and dying. Would you have still wanted this life? Would you have still decided on immortality if you had the possibility of a life I could never give you. And of course, I thought that, if things had been the way I wanted for you, would I have had the ability to stay away from you if it granted you that shot at happily ever after with a man you could grow old with and create a family. But even with these 'what if's and endless questions, I never entirely convinced myself that I would have had the strength to stay away from you. But hearing you say that, hearing you confess that you would have ended your life instead of changing to preserve the treaty, I realize that you probably would have had the strength to leave me. You have strength that I don't and could never possess, Houston."

My dead heart felt even heavier in my chest as I listened to Edward talk about our lives not turning out the way it had. Of course, I'd given some thought to the same things he had. But I had always come to the same conclusion. No matter what my life had been like before he entered it, I was entirely convinced that this was the only path open to me. It was the only path that gave me him for eternity. It was exactly what I would have wanted, sick or healthy. "Edward," I sighed and moved to stand in front of him, being mindful of the strength that still ran undiluted through my veins as I placed my hands on his cheeks. "I can stand here and say that I would have rather died than brought this down on our family. But I really don't think I have the strength you credit me with. My life, in any form, is meaningless without you in it. Yes, I hate that I've unknowingly broken a treaty that preserves our safety, but it's something we _will_ deal with together. This involves me just as much as it involves you, since these...people know I still exist. They know the truth so I don't have to hide from them like I do with the humans. I wish you would let me handle this in a way I really think will help. Maybe it will create a different outcome, if they have all the facts. Maybe if they know that you didn't enter into this lightly, if they realized that my life was at stake and I knew nothing of the treaty, then this won't end the way I know you fear it will."

A soft sigh bubbled up past his lips as he stared over my head, into the forest that was behind me. I could see the fear pooling in his eyes when he thought about what the nullified treaty meant. Our existances were at risk for exposure, not just from the pack of werewolves that I now knew were our sworn enemies, but also from the nomadic vampire that was carelessly taking human life and risking us even further. "It's coming at us from all sides, love." He sighed again then abruptly pulled me into his arms. I didn't resist as I laid my head on his chest and wound my arms around his midsection. He was right. It was coming at us from all sides. One problem after another was cropping up and I honestly wasn't sure when it was all going to go away. When were we going to be able to just enjoy eternity together? When were we going to be able to finally stop and enjoy the fact that I was no longer hanging on by a mortal thread?


	25. Chapter 25

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius; I'm just the geek that got bored. PLEASE REVIEW! They help with the creative flow._

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**Chapter Twenty-Five:**

If it were possible, things were getting even worse than they had just hours before. One minute I'd been worried about the sun hitting me while I watched Margie's body lower into the ground, and the next, I was anticipating the arrival of something Alice could not see. For the first time since I'd met her, her visions had completely disappeared and she was blind. She couldn't see what was coming for us next.

Thankfully a timeline had formed before her visions suddenly cut off and that gave me a couple of free moments to just sit and think. I'd escaped out onto the porch since Tanya, Kate, Irina, Carmen, and Eleazar were still visiting us. It had been decided that the Cullens would need help if it came down to a fight between our family and the La Push werewolf pack. Edward still hadn't budged on his decision to not let me go face them on my own. And of course, everyone had agreed. It was too dangerous for me, even if I was invincible and stronger than anyone else in my family. One vampire going to take on a six-figure pack of werewolves was a suicide mission in the gravest of senses.

Keeping my chin in my hands, I just sighed and continued to let my eyes routinely sweep over the trees that hid the white house behind me from the main road. Something was coming for us, but we didn't know which side to expect the ambush. That unsettled me, but there was a new fear curling in the pit of my stomach. Eleazar had been giving me weird looks almost from the moment I'd walked into the living room to find them here. I didn't understand it and Edward was powerless to quench my curiosity. But, just as with Edward, the source of my thoughts suddenly stepped out from the house and silently glided over to sit down beside me on the wide porch entrance.

"You're worrying needlessly." Eleazar had a calming voice, thick with the culture he'd been embodied with. If I hadn't been so used to different walks of life, I was sure that most of what he said would have been lost on my ears.

"There's a lot for me to worry about." I sighed and looked down as I let my hands fall in front of me, elbows still braced on my jean-covered thighs. Alice was pouting that I wouldn't let her play dress-up, but now was not the time to consider giving me a makeover. Maybe, if we made it out of this alive and in one piece, I would endulge my fashion-forward sister-in-law. "Things that don't really matter right now, and things that matter so much it's making my head spin."

"What are you worrying about that doesn't matter now?" Again, his voice was still calm as he asked a question I was sure would have been voiced by someone before him.

"Why you're giving me weird looks, for one." I blurted out before I could really stop myself and winced before turning my head to look at him. "Sorry, didn't mean to be so blunt. I'm still not used to being around other vampires now that I am one."

A small chuckle built up in his chest as he nodded and looked ahead of us into the small forest hiding my home. "I forget how little you know of our world. I know that Edward didn't want to overwhelm you with everything you were facing, and I can't begrudge him for that. Had I been in his shoes, I cannot honestly say that I would have been able to tell Carmen all the horrors of my world as I watched her weaken with a human disease."

My nose wrinkled almost instantly, and against my will. I hated to think about that time in my life, no matter how important it was to where I was now. I just didn't like dwelling on how Edward must have felt while watching me die. "Yeah, there's a lot that I'm finding out as I go. I wish I'd of known before."

"Would that have changed your decision?" Eleazar asked suddenly, his golden eyes boring into mine relentlessly.

"No." I replied with absolute certainty, knowing full well that Edward and the rest of our family could hear every single word flowing between Eleazar and me. "I made the decision that I wanted most. My illness, from my place in all this, had very little to do with wanting to join this world. I wanted Edward for as long as he wanted me. It just worked out that we both wanted eternity."

"And that he was able to give it to you." He added on with a gentle smile, reminding me dimly of the small conversations I'd been able to trick my husband into. I could see now that Eleazar did have a very gentle disposition, I'd even been able to see it when he traveled with his family to watch my human self marry my immortal love. "But there is much you need to know, now that you're one of us. Has Edward ever mentioned the Volturi?"

Thinking about it for a minute, I even bit down on my lower lip before beginning to nod slowly. "They have a connection to Carlisle. I know he spent some time with a coven by that name once."

The gentle smile reformed Eleazar's lips once again as he nodded and actually bodily turned to face me. Almost as if he were settling in for some long, drawn out story. A story I needed to hear, and was now able to. "You are right, but there's more to this coven than their connection to Carlisle. They are royality among our kind, they appointed themselves the leaders of all vampires, taking it along themselves to govern and place laws on what we can and cannot do."

I nodded and concentrated as he went into further detail about this intricate family dynamic. They feasted on human blood, thinking themselves noble and, like he'd said, the royal family of all vampires. There were three of them; brothers Marcus, Caius and Aro. They all had gifts, like Edward, Alice, Jasper, and now Kate and Eleazar. I hadn't known that before. As he went on, explaining the hierarchy that encased this family, I was grateful for my vampire mind. All of this would have been too much to take in as a human. "I used to be one of them, a member of the Volturi guard. It's a high honor among our kind, but I was impertinant to Caius, Marcus, and Aro. I used to search for vampires, and some humans, that displayed extraordinary gifts."

"Like Edward and Alice." I muttered, shivering involuntarily at a new mental image. The picture Eleazar had painted was pretty graphic thanks to my mind, but for some reason; thinking about members of my family among the Volturi guard unsettled me. I didn't like it, but couldn't let myself dwell on it.

"And you." He answered and completely broke my train of thought.

I gaped at him for a second then, seeing my expression through the reflection of his eyes, sobered up and flashed him an apologetic look. "I'm sorry but you're wrong, Eleazar. The only gift I have is my control. How easily I've been able to adapt to everything."

"That is truly exceptional." He agreed with another light smile then shook his head, dark locks catching the wind at his action. "But you also hold a gift that the Volturi would love to have among their ranks. You're a shield, Houston."

"A shield?" My voice deadpanned and Edward was suddenly standing behind us. Craning my neck so I could see his expression clearly, I winced again when I saw the confusion in his own eyes.

"What did you just call my wife?" He asked, his voice straining to sound polite as he knelt beside me, facing Eleazar.

"A shield." He repeated, showing know signs of exasperation at having to do so. "I haven't been able to get a clear read on her, and I ask for your forgiveness at the looks." Ah, that explained it.

"You were looking at me weirdly because you were trying to _read_ me?" There was no doubt I was in complete shock now.

"Yes." He inclined his head ever so slightly then addressed us both, instead of zeroing in on one person, as he'd been doing before. "Have you ever been able to hear her thoughts?"

"No." Edward replied as if his answer was the most obvious statement he'd ever uttered. "But I've never been able to, even when she was still human."

"Amazing." The exotic vampire to my left breathed and stared at me with wide eyes. "That would indicate a rather powerful latent power, if it was manifesting so clearly before her transformation. I can't figure out a way around her block. I assume you have no idea of what you're doing, Houston?"

Blinking in surprise when the spotlight was cast on me suddenly, I clamped my sharp teeth around my bottom lip and shook my head dumbly.

"Because you're still so raw, I have no doubt that you're unaware of what you can do with your gift. Have you ever tried to block anyone besides myself and your mate?"

"I've never had to. Edward's the only one that hasn't been able to affect me. Alice and Jasper aren't blocked." I answered, shooting a panicked look at my husband before I looked at our well-informed guest again. "What exactly is a _shield_? What am I able to do?"

"Well," He sighed, again preparing himself for a long explanation. Suddenly I was feeling very clueless. "What you have is a purely mental defense. You're completely safe in your own mind because no one can reach you there. What Alice and Jasper do are outside the mental realms, but if any vampire tries to reach you there, they will be thwarfed. Just as Edward and I are. But you are able to protect others with this gift from mental-based attacks." I remembered suddenly two of the guards he had mentioned while explaining the Volturi hierchy. Alec and Jane, twins with exceptional gifts that could put a vampire flat on their backs. Mental powers that counteracted but fit together rather perfectly. Well, at least now I knew that, if I ever had to go up against them, at least I would be safe.

But as Eleazar continued to explain my gift, which could probably hinder the gift Kate had been reborn with, the more I suddenly wanted to start researching this new piece of my life. I knew it would do no good in a physical fight but maybe, just _maybe, _if things continued the way they were, I could find some way to keep the mindspaces of my family safe.


	26. Chapter 26

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius, I'm just a geek playing around. Please review!_

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**Chapter Twenty-Six:**

It felt like an eternity, spent out on the porch talking to Eleazar then later, the others as they trickled out to join in to hear the surprise revelations. I had a gift. A power just like various members of my family. I was still anxious to begin practicing, especially after a musing that put a thought into my head. If I could manipulate my shield to protect others' thoughts, could I push it away to leave my own thoughts exposed? Was there a way I could push this _shield_ away to give my husband a glimpse into my mind?

But before we could do anything, it was decided that a hunting trip was needed. Desperately. I now realized why we needed to act fast with the nomad still loose in Washington. If the Volturi caught wind of what was going on in Forks, it could possibly lead to more disasterous consequences. I still felt uneasy about this royal vampire family, for reasons I couldn't explain, but I didn't want them knowing anything about me. Or the ability Eleazar explained Aro would salivate for. His beloved possessions were in the form of talented vampires that would strengthen his large family.

It felt good to just run freely beside Edward, my mind already spiraling out to catch the scent of any nearby animals. There was a limited selection in the woods surrounding our house, even moreso now that a new vampire was possibly scaring away anything and everything he came across. Two more deaths had been reported since dawn and it chilled me to think how high the death toll could possibly be once we managed to stop him. But he couldn't possibly be by himself. I knew all about the raging thirst, the insatiable pull to feed and continue feeding. But could one vampire _really_ be responsible for so much death and distruction? It didn't seem plausible to me and Carlisle agreed when I quietly shared my revelation with him. But, again, it was something we could think about at a later time.

I took down at least three elk with no hesitation, being careful not to dirty my white thermal shirt and pale jeans as I fed. Edward had given me more pointers on the neater side of dining, and I was thankful. But there were still moments when I abandoned my own kill so that I could watch the svelte movements of my husband. I loved to watch the muscles coiling underneath his taunt, stone skin; knowing the kind of power that resided in his arms. It was power he was free to unleash on me now, if he so desired. And a few times he had. There were holes in the walls of our bedroom, which were quickly replastered, to prove the frenzied passion of our stolen moments of love.

"Have you had enough?" A light smile lit my husband's features as he came to rejoin me once he'd had his fill. His eyes were now light gold, the prettiest color animal blood could create in his irises and I was anxious to someday share that trait with him. The bright crimson had long left my eyecolor and it was easier to look at myself in the mirror with my changing eyes. I could lie to myself now. I was growing closer and closer to the golden spectrum with every meal. Providing it could even be called that.

"I have." I nodded and smiled up at him as I laced my fingers through his. His smile grew more pronounced as he leaned down and brushed his lips against mine before we turned to rejoin Alice, Jasper, and Esme; who had gone with us to hunt. The run back was just as relaxing as it had been when we set out, but about halfway through our course, something changed. My mind worked frantically to figure out the reason why Alice suddenly halted and Jasper twisted into a protective crouch around her. Was this the vision we had been waiting on? The one that had rendered her completely blind?

My pace quickened as I fell into step beside Edward once again, our fingers more tightly twined as we darted through the trees and overgrowth.

"Someone's waiting for us at the house. I can't be sure but I _think_ it's the wolves." She hissed out, her teeth grinding together as she tried to work through the pieces I knew she couldn't be seeing clearly. It had to be exasperating for her, not knowing how to work a talent she relied so heavily on.

When we reached the house, I forced my lungs to stop working when I heard the faint tremor of a heartbeat. It wasn't the sound I was used to, a thrumming that pulsed blood throughout the body. And there were at least three or four points of this weird pulse. Were these the werewolves that were now bent on destroying our family because they had created me?

I recieved my answer quickly as I skid to a stop behind Edward. He'd already tensed into a protective crouch as we neared our new visitors. There were two humans and two wolves. They were large in size, both the human men and the animals. Their blood was a perfect mixture of human and animal and I was thankful that it didn't send me into a bloodlust. Their scent actually made my nose wrinkle slightly as we slowly advanced on their place in the middle of our front lawn. Rosalie, Emmett, and Carlisle had already joined them, a look of pure confusion on my father's face. He didn't seem to know what to do with our visitors and our sudden appearance seemed to further his confusion.

"How was your trip?" Carlisle's voice was surprisingly calm as he greeted us, Esme quickly flittering to her husband's side as the Cullen family reassembled in front of the wolves. I remained behind Edward, almost as if I wanted to stay invisible to this possible threat.

"It was fine." Edward answered, inclining his head toward the head of our family slightly as Alice molded her tiny body against my side. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Jasper take my other side. No one was going to leave me, the newborn, unprotected in front of this enemy.

"We've come to talk about the treaty." One of the men, a large Native American man spoke in a clear, bass voice. His eyes were tight, as well as the line of lips that threw the lower part of his face into stress. "You know it expressly forbids the creation of another vampire."

"We are still well aware of that." Carlisle addressed him and I had to force back the desire to suddenly know the names of the people that were intent on performing their genetic-given duty. I couldn't begrudge them in the least, after all, this was what they had been born to do. Destroy the creations around me. "But perhaps it will change your mind if you have all the facts."

"Doubtful." The second human spoke before the first could. My eyebrows furrowed as I took in his appearance. He was slightly taller than the man to his left, his hair shaggy and unkept. He looked as muscular as Emmett and I could see it would be a fair fight. No matter how this was sliced, it was doubtful that we would all walk away from this.

Not thinking, I stepped away from my protectors and eased in front of Edward, who was standing directly in front of the human men that only wore cut-off sweatpants. Another question formed in my mind, but I quickly repressed it as I appraised the new danger in front of me. "I'm sorry." I spoke quietly, yet clearly. I couldn't afford to let anyone around me see just how scared I was of my sudden moment of bravery. The adrenaline from hunting still flowed easily through my veins and I knew it wouldn't take much to push me to the extreme limits of my newborn power. Maybe taking _me_ down wouldn't be as easy as they'd forseen. "If I had known about the treaty, I would never have asked that of my family."

"You're the new leech they created?" Again, the second one spoke up and I forced myself not to turn when I heard several, low hisses vibrate against my back. So we were already jumping into the derogetory names. Good to know.

Not letting it bother me, I just nodded and let my back tense as my shoulders squared. I kept my fingers loose against my sides before ultimately shoving them into the pockets of my jeans. The action was minute, but it made me feel better. Made me feel more calm and casual in these surroundings. "I am. It probably won't matter to you at all, but my name is Houston Cullen. I was dying of cancer when I met the rest of the Cullens. They saved my life because I asked them, not because they had a blatant disreguard for your treaty."

"That doesn't matter. What they did violates the agreement we made. They exist only if no life is in danger."

I was taken aback a bit when the first, the obvious leader of this mutant pack addressed me. His dark eyes were intently focused on me and did little to conceal his distain for being here, on Cullen land. He hated that things had come to this, that he'd had to leave the protection of his home to deal with us. "No life was in danger." I announced, not feeling the slightest inkling to look away from the man that was staring at me with so much revile. How tainted had their history had become as a result of my kind? What had prompted these humans, these _men_ to hate beings they didn't even know?! It was painfully obvious that they hadn't even bothered to get to know the vampires they would soon prepare to take down. Myself included. But they didn't seem unable to listen to reason. And that was something I had on my side for the moment. If I could somehow explain everything, tell them that a life wasn't forfeit, as they saw it, then maybe all of this could possibly be resolved.

"Innocent humans are dying." The second man spat out and my curiosity of knowing his name raged vibrantly throughout my mind.

"Not by my hands." I even held my arms up slightly in a surrending motion I remembered from my human days. "I am a newborn in every sense of the word, but I haven't tasted a single drop of human blood. Nor do I want to." There was a low whining from the animals flanking the men, but I ignored it and forced myself to go on. I couldn't afford myself the moment to register the changes in the second man's expression as he continued to stare at me. "My reverence for human life is just as strong now as it was when I was still mortal. I've known more human suffering than I'll ever care to admit verbally and I don't wish that on any other person in existance. My diet is the same as my family's, I feed only on animals to sustain myself."

"What do you mean?" The second man interrupted me, forcing my eyes away from the leader. I could clearly see the changes in his expression now, the lines around his lips and eyes softening slightly as he digested everything I'd just said. "You've known more human suffering?"

I sighed and resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Why couldn't that be as painfully obvious as my standing here?! Why did I have to go into detail about the horrors of my past with men whose names I didn't even know? But if it saved my family.... Forcing a quick burst of air through my lungs, my hands fell back to my sides as I looked at the taller human. "I'm sure you don't want every single gory detail, so I will condense as much as possible. I lost my mother when I was nine years old to the same cancer that I was diagnosed with at fourteen. By then, I was a foster child being shuttled around from one bad situation to another. I can't explain what that was like, feeling useless and invisible unless something was wanted from you. Be it a needed punching bag, someone to hurl nasty words at, or all the nasty, sexual connotations I'm sure you can come up with on your own. I was sixteen when my body stopped responding to treatment and by the time I met the Cullens; I decided to stop fighting. It weakened me considerably and by the time I married Edward, my body was shutting down. Them creating me, bringing me into this world and thus voiding the treaty; there was absolutely no hope for me. My heart had even stopped just moments before...yeah." Losing steam, I just shrugged at the last word and gave in to the compelling urge to look at the grass beneath my Converse.

I could feel the silence behind me, my family staring holes into my back as I tried to talk us out of harm's way. There was also an uncomfortable silence coming from the wolves and I had to force myself to look up again. Instead of concentrating on the man I had just explained my entire, sad story to; I went for the leader. The one that I knew would ultimately make the final decision. "Please," I whispered, not entirely sure that they would hear the impassioned plea that was desperate to escape my lips. "If you loved someone, truly loved them so much that it changed the way you saw and thought of everything, could you deliver their death sentence? Could you stand by and watch as they struggled to do something as simple as open their eyes? That was what I was asking of my family by remaining human. I had to stand by and watch as my husband tormented himself by remaining at my side as my internal organs shut down. He was also tormented by the decision to change me, to take my human life. As was my entire family. But can you honestly stand there and condemn us for saving my life in the only way they knew? If you can though...." I sighed and forced my muscles to coil even tighter as I threw my shoulders, which had haunched slightly as I told my story, back into the strongest stance I'd ever taken. "I'm the one that violated this treaty, not the Cullens. If you have to punish someone, I ask that you hold _me_ responsible. I know, now, that the treaty was created to preserve human lives; to keep your families safe from our kind. But I am truly not a treat to you or anything you hold dear. All I ask is that you let me hold onto the happiness that has taken me seventeen years to obtain. Please don't take my family from me, not for a decision I willingly made and acted on. I am not the threat you think I am. There is another of our kind out there, that lives a life we don't, taking human life. But those deaths were not by my hand, though I do feel responsible."

"Why do you feel responsible?" The deep bass slipped past the russet-hued man's lips as he stared at me in utter astonishment and confusion. He didn't seem to know what to do with himself right then. It was almost as if...he were raging some kind of inner battle at the moment. I began to bank my unfounded hopes on his hesitation. Maybe my idea hadn't been so crazy after all.

"Because I'm the one that ran across the nomad first. I saw him about to feed on a woman I knew briefly from my illness."

"So you stood by and let him feed from her?!" Anger hit the air quickly and I could feel the different changes as easily as if I'd watched them all play out in front of my eyes. My family tensed behind me and the wolves prepared to take on their own stances of preservation.

"No." I forced my body to remain relaxed as I shook my head ever so slightly. "I distracted him enough that the woman was able to escape. She considered herself very lucky that night, word around town is that she would have been raped and murdered if the man hadn't decided against it."

The confusion replaced the anger so quickly that my human eyes wouldn't have been able to pick up on it. But my vampire eyes, so infallible in their detailing, noticed every single flicker and change. "Apparently we didn't have the entire story."

Relief ran free through my veins as the second man turned slightly toward his peer. I had said something that struck a chord in him, he wasn't looking at me the same way he had when I first appeared in the small meadow we had unknowingly assembled in. "We need to discuss this."

"There's nothing to discuss." The leader hissed violently, his eyes never leaving me as he talked to someone else. "The treaty expressly forbade them from biting a human. They did this and it resulted in another vampire. That's punishable by our laws."

"Oh please." The second one snorted and I almost laughed aloud when his eyes rolled in their sockets before looking at the wolves surrounding them. "I say we at least talk about it, okay? Maybe this doesn't have to result in a fight that not everyone's going to walk away from."

The internal war I'd noticed in the second man's expression suddenly appeared in the first then, before any of us could dare to breathe, the wolves and humans were backing toward a nearby group of trees. "We aren't going far." He threatened, but his voice didn't hold the same malice as before. "We ask you let us discuss this before any decision is made."

"Of course." Carlisle stepped forward then, his hand flattening over the small of my back as he joined me. "Take all the time you need, we will be on the porch to give you some privacy." And an added sense of security, I was sure but didn't vocalize that. Why stress things even further by being a smartass? Too much rested on their deliberation. I had given them some serious details to consider and I hoped feverishly, as I slowly joined my family on the wide, wooden porch, that I had given them a detail that made it impossible to destroy us.


	27. Chapter 27

_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**_ _The story is winding down! Things are about to get intense but please, bare with me as I get these chapters posted. Hopefully you guys like how this is turning out._

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius, I'm just the geek that got inspired. Please review._

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**Chapter Twenty-Seven:**

It felt like forever that the wolves spent deliberating. Edward hadn't moved from his place at the base of the porch steps, his eyes clearly focused on the small space of trees where the wolves had congregated to decide on their next course of action. I knew he was probably eavesdropping in his 'special' wave and before I was really sure of what I was doing, I stood beside him, my hand carefully gripping his bicep.

"What're they saying?" I asked softly, knowing how easily our voices carried. And I had no idea how much the wolves knew about my family and the fact that several of my siblings were talented beyond means of vampirism. Suddenly, I didn't want to give them any kind of advantage or loophole to work through.

"They keep going back and forth." He admitted with a heavy sigh, frustration and uncertainty emanating from every frozen pore on his body. I didn't think twice in wrapping my arms around his waist, curling as tightly against his side as I could. He allowed my movements, one arm curling around my haunched shoulders as he buried his lips in my hair. "But I _think_ it might turn out okay."

I found myself nodding but before I could say anything else, I heard a sharp intake of breath coming from behind me. I didn't even think as I whirled around to face Alice, her eyes focused on the wide clearing that served as our driveway. A million shards of ice began to slide through my veins when I noticed the familiar bouncing of a vehicle. Not just any vehicle, but a car I'd seen over a million times before in the past. A car that forced me to hide from my own home.

"This isn't happening." I muttered, shaking my head slowly as Edward practically flew into my line of vision. I was blocked now, completely unable to see anything as two of the wolves suddenly emerged from their hiding place. Thankfully they were human with eyebrows knit together in confusion.

"Who is that?" The second one asked quietly, so quietly that I wasn't even sure I'd heard him right. Not thinking, I turned and sprinted down the length of the porch. I was sure my movements couldn't be followed by human eyes and the driver was still so far down the path that he didn't have a clear view of the house yet. But that didn't matter. I had to hide and fast. I just barely heard Edward call my name as I vaulted over the high railing and landed with the softest of thuds in the grass. My muscles seemed to have a mind of their own as I continued to run from the unwelcome guests. Not just the wolves, but the man driving the nondescript Toyota Camry. The very man that could completely rip my life apart at the seams. Where Michael Sherwood wouldn't destroy me, the wolves very well could.

I heard footsteps echoing behind me as I darted through the trees and ducked under low-laying tree branches. Fear and anxiety had everything flowing freely through my veins and I was completely unable to stop and find out just who had decided to chase me. But finally, my instincts gripped me so tightly that it was all I could think of and my body was quick to retaliate. Whirling around, my muscles contracted and coiled easily into a defensive crouch as I awaited my visitor. But when I saw who it was, I froze. It felt like ice was flowing through my veins, having taken the place of venom and I didn't even think it was possible that my body could feel even colder than it already was.

The second wolf, in human form, had decided to follow me.

"I just came to talk!" He warned, hands outstretched in front of him in a surrendering motion. Any other time and I would have laughed aloud at this boy approaching a dangerous vampire like a cop approaching a suspect. "I just need to know why you ran. What's happening?"

Sighing, I silently slipped out of my crouch and raised back up to my full height. It was a little depressing that I didn't even reach this man's shoulders. Damn mutant giants. "Tell me your name first." I blurted out, not quite achieving the task of keeping animosity from my voice as I addressed him.

The man relaxed and shrugged as he slumped closer to me. He was alone. Who in their right mind would engage a newborn vampire alone?! Especially a vampire he and his entire family were hell-bent on destroying. It didn't sound like a very sane plan to me and suddenly I wished that Edward was here to read this guy's mind. "My name's Jacob. Jacob Black. The Cullens made the pact with my great-grandfather, Ephram Black."

"Oh." I muttered and nodded slowly, as if I knew exactly what he was talking about. Details of the treaty were still murky to me and I silently cursed my husband for keeping that from me. How could he have left me so unprotected if there was a possibility this would be brought down on us? "How did you find out the treaty was broken? No one in town thinks I survived."

This boy, Jacob, sighed and he suddenly looked no older than I'd been when Edward saved me. "When we heard about the killings, spread out in Forks, Port Angeles and Sequim; we weren't entirely sure who was behind it. Then news trickled down about your death and how you'd been married to one of the lee -- one of them, and we just kind of put two and two together."

"But you know now that I had nothing to do with it." As soon as I said that, the words began to flow past my lips in a rapid swirl. It was almost as if I had to make the most of this stolen moment. Perhaps I could pursuade this boy, explain to Jacob that the treaty didn't needed to be void. "Maybe the pact could be reinstated. I know that Carlisle wouldn't have a problem renegotiating and none of us have the slightest inkling to create another vampire. I really was just a rare exception to all of this. They really only did this," I paused and motioned at my frozen body still clad in the white thermal and worn jeans, "to save me. I asked them to stop my heart, I knew what I was doing and what I was asking for. I had no idea about the treaty but...." Trailing off, all I could really do was shrug as I looked at him imploringly.

The expression on his face changed as he took a couple more steps toward me. I couldn't quite describe or assume what he was thinking and feeling in that moment. "If you'd known about the treaty, would it have changed your mind?"

Confusion furrowed my eyebrows and I shook my head slowly in incomprehension. "What do you mean?"

Jacob sighed and looked away before his complete focus was once again thrown on me. His arms folded tightly across his chest when his steps took him too close to me for his liking. His nose was wrinkled slightly and after a moment, I realized that mine was too. We really didn't smell all that appealing to one another, something I was extremely grateful for. It made my unusual tolerance to human blood that much stronger. "If you had known that stopping your heart would mean a war between our families, would you still have gone through with it? Or would you have changed your mind and died like you were supposed to?"

The last part of his question stung, so much so that my nose actually wrinkled more. This time having nothing to do with the outragiously heated scent flowing off Jacob in waves. "Yes." I replied after a second to think and nodded as my eyes lifted to meet his. "Without a doubt, my family's well-being will always be more important to me than my own. If Edward had told me, if I'd known exactly what my creation would set into motion, I would have died without a second's hesitation. I don't want a war to erupt between our families." I sighed then and turned to drop down on a nearby exposed tree root. It was large and formed almost a perfect arch against the ground, giving me enough clearance that I could sit and not feel unbalanced. Still, I braced my sneakered feet and trapped my hands between my jeaned knees, staring up at him as I forced myself to continue. "I don't know you, Jacob. I don't know your family or the members of your pack. But I do know that I want no harm to come to any of you. To any human. Maybe it's some humanity left in me from my past, I don't know. But I'm so completely adverse to taking human life that the thought of me as a vampire is almost laughable. I don't react normally to the scent of human blood and while it did scare me a little in the beginning, I'm not acting the way a normal newborn should be. I've been able to be around humans and not feel the slightest inkling to bite them. Yes, my throat erupts in flames and I feel my muscles coil on their own. But at the core of my being, the essence of who I used to be very much still exists. So if you kill me," I frowned and raised abruptly to my feet. "If you destroy me and my family, it will feel very much like it did when the cancer inflicted that last bit of damage on me."

Jacob sighed and bowed his head as he digested my words. There was noise far off in the distance, voices raised in octaves that I could hear clearly if I chose to get closer. But right then, I couldn't turn my back on this boy. Not when he seemed to be mulling so intently over how I'd just answered his question. "We have no idea of what to do." He sighed and glanced behind him, toward the direction of the noise. "Of course there's the nomad to take out. We have to do that, there's no doubt about it."

"My family and I will take care of it." I blurted out without a second thought, my facial expression not changing as I continued to stare into the direction back to the house. "He's our problem, not yours."

"He hunted on our lands." Jacob growled suddenly and his body began to shake. Having no idea what that meant, I just nodded and held my hands out slightly. But before either of us could come to some sort of decision, we gained an audience.

"Houston!" Edward's voice broke through the trees first, rushing to my side before he enveloped me in a fierce hug. I responded automatically, as if my body had no other choice. I pulled away at once when I felt the tension in my husband's arm and panic abundantly clear on his features.

"What is it?" I asked at once, my own expression staring back at me through the reflection of his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"The nomad." He sighed heavily and his expression became even more pained as he gripped my hand tightly in his. "He's decided to show up once again."

"But..." Trailing off, my mind was quicker than the rest of my body at putting the pieces together. I'd had to run from the house because Michael had been driving up, no doubt to try and coerce money from the Cullens one more time. "He took Michael."

Jacob finally reasserted his presence then, shivers once again rolling across his frame in waves. "Who's Michael?"

"My biological father." I sighed and looked up at him, easily feeling it when Edward twisted around to face him as well. "He's been trying to extort money from my family since before I died."

"He's human." Jacob guessed and Edward nodded to confirm it, his arm sliding around my waist as if to hold me upright. Something I would have needed while still trapped in my frail, human body. But now all I could think of was the excrutiating mental images flowing through my mind. Granted, I didn't exactly like Michael and his presence in my life. But that didn't mean I wanted my world to touch him. I'd simply wanted him to disappear, go back to the family I knew he'd created after losing my mother.

Glancing up at Edward, I bit down on my lower lip then quickly averted my eyes to Jacob. Yet another moment when I was fiercely grateful for the shield that protected my mind from my husband's supernatural quirk. "Kill me later. I have something to do first." I didn't let either man standing in front of me say anything else as I scooted between them and began to run as fast as my legs could carry me. The scent of the nomad, mixed now with Michael's pulsing musk, was heavy in the air and easy to track as I crossed the small meadow in front of the house, my family still crowded together at the base of the front porch. Not paying them any mind, I just pushed myself further, knowing someone would follow and possibly try to stop me before I reached my intended goal.


	28. Chapter 28

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius, I'm just the geek that got inspired. Please review._

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**Chapter Twenty-Eight:**

Once I had caught his scent, it was painfully easy to find the vampire that had snatched my biological father from our front yard. I still had no idea how this could have happened. How could Michael have been so stupid?! Surely he must have realized just how different my family looked from the other members of Forks' society. He couldn't be so dense that he completely ignored the subconscious warnings that the Cullens' appearance sparked.

But then again, I'd never really heeded those warnings either. I had emersed myself so deeply in their world that escape had long ago become impossible. But this was an entirely different situation. Michael hadn't fallen in love with one of the painfully beautiful and dangerous vampires. That had been my path, the one that led me to where I was currently at.

The trail ended and I screeched to a stop, my eyes quickly scanning the thick growth and moss surrounding me. I was deep in the forest surrounding our house. I wasn't even sure if I was still anywhere _close_ to the house, but movements behind me let me know that I had not traveled this path alone. Alice had probably seen me going after the nomad and Michael alone and they all joined together to help me. But then, with the wolves still heavily in the equation, maybe Alice hadn't seen this. It was quite possible that she'd never even needed that vision to know what I was going to do once I had found out an innocent human's life was in danger. No matter what this human had done to me, it didn't warrant a painful death.

The nomad suddenly appeared in front of me, his muscular arm curled tightly around Michael's neck. There was no hope of escape for him now, I could see that right off. This vampire knew what he was doing, he was far more experienced than I was in this arena.

Suddenly my bright idea didn't sound too easy at the moment. What had I been planning to do when I started to streak through the forest at an impossible speed? Not to mention, Michael thought I was dead. I was exposing myself to him in order to save his life. Even if he walked away from this, there was no way my family and I would be able to stay in the area. What extremes would Michael go to, now that he'd seen what had become of me? Would he tell everyone he could find that I was still alive? That I wasn't buried in a far-away cemetary in Texas.

None of that mattered right then as the immortal began to slowly advance on me. Michael's feet dragged slightly against the ground, unable to catch his footing. He was too tightly bound against the enormous vampire's body. And as he grew closer, the scent of fresh blood in the air hit me like a wrecking ball. This monster had already broken my biological father's skin, making him bleed.

"Let him go." I growled, the bell-like chorus of my voice making me want to jump in surprise. How was it possible that _I_ could sound so threatening?! I certainly didn't feel like a danger right then. But this was also the first time my very nature had been tested. Sure, my human life had been riddled with trails and tests of my physical strength. Each time I'd fallen to my knees in agony. I'd been beaten almost every single time I'd been approached by a stronger competitor. Would that still hold in my new body? Or was I capable of taking this sentient creature down to preserve the pulse he held in his arms?

"And if I don't?" He goaded suddenly, his lips pulling back from his teeth in a wide sneer. The arm around Michael's neck tightened ever so slightly, but it was just enough that he choked and his eyes bulged slightly.

"You're going to choke him to death." I replied evenly, not even bothering to look behind me when I felt new vibrations in the ground beneath my feet. It was either reinforcements or more danger behind me. Either way, I couldn't afford to look away from the danger directly in front of me. "What good is it to choke him to death when all you clearly want to do is drain him?" There was no use in keeping with pretenses now. I honestly couldn't see a way out of this for Michael now and his blood would be on my hands. All because he had decided to come find me after so many years of silence.

"He's very close." Edward's quiet voice in my ear sounded like the most heavenly of melodies when he breathed into my ear. I hadn't even noticed him creep up behind me until his unique scent filled my senses. I was momentarily derailed by the desire that always gripped me whenever my husband was so close, but I was able to easily push it aside this time. If we got out of this alive, he was _not_ leaving the house until I'd ebbed at least some of my craving for him. It was entirely possible, as I stood here watching certain death, that we would somehow give Rosalie and Emmett a run for their money in that department. But first....

"What do you have to gain by killing him?" Edward asked suddenly, his eyes no longer on me but the nomad standing before us. "He's merely food. There are thousands like him elsewhere."

"Yes, but none that are as tied to him as your mate is." Confusion gripped me tightly and my head tilted just a little as I tried to figure out what exactly he was getting at. What did _I _have to do with this?! What had I done to piss this guy off and force him to want to drain Michael? "You see," He sighed and seemed to know that he'd just said something to confuse us all. Providing there was an us. I still hadn't looked behind me and didn't entirely want to right then. "She kept me from a rather delectable meal. I'm sure you can understand." He nodded his head once, sharply in Edward's direction and tightened his grip on Michael when the man suddenly struggled against him. "Because of her interferrance, I couldn't even go back and reclaim what was mine. She was too closely guarded after emerging from the woods, you see. And she had the _sweetest_ blood I've ever smelled. I'm sure you can attest to smelling something that simply makes your mouth water. And don't bother lying, I have done my research."

More ice felt like it was flooding my stomach as I took an unconscious step back, into my husband's body as I finally caught Michael's eyes for the very first time. He looked exactly as he had in my murky, human memories. Only this time, his eyes were wide in fear. In ever sense of the word, he was being confronted by a ghost. The long-lost daughter he thought had died and been buried. "So that's the reason for all this?" I screeched without warning, taking at least four heated steps toward the source of my sudden anger. It felt like a floodgate had suddenly been split wide open within me, all I could see was red and a strange metallic taste formed on my tongue.

I didn't care or even feel the hands trying to restrain me as I took more steps toward Michael and the nomad. I didn't care that I had no idea who this being's name was, or that what I was about to do could possibly get Michael killed. The scent of his blood grew more potent the closer I got, but that was honestly the last thing on my mind as I slid into a crouch in front of the offending vampire. "I'm going to say it again; _let him go_."

"What are you going to do if I don't?" The nomad sneered again, but he had lost some of the menace he'd held before. He was clearly torn now, uncertain of what he wanted to do next. The blood was now flowing freely down Michael's exposed arm, pooling around his wrist before dripping down toward the ground. I cut off all oxygen to my lungs and forced my thoughts into coherency. One wrong step and it could be bad for everyone involved.

Everything that happened next was a dizzying blur of movements. One moment I was preparing to lung at the vampire that had threatened everything I held dear and the next, tearing flesh broke the momentary silence that had fallen. Michael slumped to the ground effortlessly as three bodies decended on the nomad. Two were wolves, ripping into the creature's skin as if their teeth were merely knives cutting into butter. Stone arms latched around my waist before I could even attempt to stand right back up and my feet left the ground without warning.

"Let me go!" I yelled, my voice reverberating painfully around me. It wasn't enough to completely drown out the noise of tearing flesh as I was whirled away from the gory scene in front of me. It was only then that I realized Edward was the third body to befall on the now screaming nomad.

"You don't need to see this!" I quit thrashing at once when I heard Emmett. "Stop fighting me, Houston, _please_?"

I gave up at once, a weird sort of mangled scream flowing from my lips. I was still seeing red, my body and mind crying out for the destruction being unleashed yards from me. But Emmett didn't let me go until we were at least several feet away from the fight and once I was set back on my feet, I noticed that only Rosalie, Alice, and Esme were standing around me. "Where are the others?"

"Helping." Esme announced and quickly pulled me into her arms. Whether it was to keep me from running back or just a motherly embrace, I wasn't sure. But I collapsed against her effortlessly, her stone body accomodating mine as if I weighed nothing at all. "Carlisle is trying to pull Michael from the fighting and the others are helping Edward and the wolves get rid of the nomad's remains. It's all going to be okay now."

The weird sounds continued to swirl around me as I hid my face in the front of my mother's shirt, the far-off sound of stones being ripped apart still assaulting my ears. I had no doubt that any amount of distance could completely cleanse my ears of that sound. It would forever be engrained in my mind now. My brain was just too powerful to block things out as I'd once been able to. The shield that could protect my mind from outside forces was powerless against the images and noises I'd just been exposed to. There really was no getting around the realization that suddenly gripped me tighter than Emmett had while carrying me away. Everything was going to change now. Nothing could go back to what it had once been.


	29. Chapter 29

_Author's note at the end of chapter._

_Stephenie Meyer's the genius, I'm just a geek that got inspired. Please review!_

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**Chapter Twenty-Nine:**

Once the nomad had been properly disposed of, and a fire raged on long enough to reduce body parts to ash; everyone had reassembled at the house. Even the wolves, now all in their human form, had collapsed in various spots on the lawn in front of the house while my family crowded in on the front porch. Even after everything that had just happened, with two immortal enemies coming together to destroy a mutual enemy; they still felt the need to put space between themselves. It was probably for the scent, none of us being able to stand being so close to the wolves.

Either way, as soon as Edward had come back to the house, I didn't leave the safety of his arms. The magnet that had been joked about being embedded beneath our skin felt even more powerful, now that we'd faced nearly losing one another. But there was still an uncomfortability that no one seemed ready to address. We had one large obstacle now out of the way, the nomad wasn't going to be able to hurt anyone else. It had cost Michael's life in the end, but the danger from the werewolves still loomed heavily over our heads.

It made me sick in a strange way, thinking of Michael's demise and how he was never coming for me again. The thing that had set all the craziness into motion was when the nomad finally succumbed to his thirst and buried his teeth in Michael's neck. The force of it had snapped his neck and he was gone instantly. There was no recovering from an injury like that and a weird sadness enveloped me as a result. I couldn't entirely be sure that it was all because I'd just lost someone I never intimately knew, but the heaviness was there nonetheless.

"Carlisle." A familiar voice broke the silence and I finally pulled my eyes from Edward's face to see the leader of the wolves slowly approaching the front steps. He looked wary, as if the small battle had taken more out of him than he'd thought he had to expend. There was also a sadness in his eyes that hadn't leaked to the surface until now. Maybe he'd seen something that had changed his mind. Either way, my body tensed as I sat up to watch the head of our family pull away from his true love to join the leader of the werewolf pack. "I think we have finally reached our decision."

I was on my feet before Edward could pull me back down to his lap. A million thoughts began to swirl through my mind as I counted every possible, negative outcome. Was it our turn now to burn in a well-contained fire? We were doomed to the same fate we had just delievered a nameless, bloodthirsty vampire into?

Edward stood as well, lightly gripping my arm as if he sensed me creating a repeat of what had happened just an hour before. But I felt rooted in place, my feet too heavy to lift and carry me to the edge of the porch landing.

"While it did break the treaty, creating her," He pointed at me then let his hand fall back to his side as he continued. "She has posed no immediate threat to our families and after today, we don't believe that she will. I think I can speak for my pack when I say that we would consider replacing the old treaty with a new one."

"Of course." Carlisle consented at once, the relief heavy in his voice as he nearly danced down the steps and raised his hand for the leader, who Edward whispered was named Sam in my ear, to accept. "We are certainly ammenable to that. The old boundary lines will remain in effect, along with the agreement that no harm will come to a human by our hands. I also cannot forsee us having the need to create another vampire while residing in Forks."

"All the same," Sam sighed and hedged an uncertain look at Carlisle as their hands briefly clasped before dropping. "We would like it very much if, were the need presented itself again, we would be notified of it beforehand."

Carlisle nodded again, the smile never wavering on his face as he took a step back toward the porch. Probably to give Sam enough space that he would feel even a little confortable again. After all, this man was giving us our freedom back. Our families were parting on a good yet somber note. No more blood would be shed today and the realization made me sag back against my husband's chest. "Thank you." I nearly breathed the words out, my hand finding Edward's blindly as I smiled gratefully at Sam, then Jacob who slowly advanced toward the house.

A curt nod was delievered in response to my feverish outpour of gratitude, then the wolves turned and darted into the woods once more. They didn't return, as a deep pocket in the back of my mind irrationally feared.

"Is it really over?" I was still whispering as my body whirled around to face Edward easily. His lips met mine briefly before a genuine, worry-free smile lit up his features.

"It's really over, Houston. We may have to leave Forks now, before anyone can suspect that we're connected to Michael's death. But yes, love. We're once again safe to resume our old habits."

"Thank God." I sighed heavily then quickly threw my arms around his neck. I was still being supported by him, but couldn't help the small peal of laughter when he picked me up and nearly crushed me against him. The air swirled around me for a brief second before Edward's lips met mine once more. I easily ignored the obnoxious throat-clearing from Emmett, tangling one hand in the back of Edward's hair before I pulled away suddenly. "Where are we going now?"

"To Denali, of course." Edward laughed easily as the rest of our family gathered around us, everyone still rejoicing and hugging now that the danger was gone. "We have to tell them the good news they were unable to stick around for. They're probably still very worried about us all."

"Oh great." I moaned suddenly and let my forehead fall against Edward's shoulder.

"What?" He was anxious all over again, fingers combing through my hair in an attempt to get me to look up at him.

"It's just that..." I frowned and looked up at him, a pitiful pout contorted my lips. "Well I was hoping for a little recovery time before my self-esteem took yet another beating."

The most perfect sound in the world flowed around me as I was once again pulled protectively against my true love's chest. "You impossibly silly, beautiful girl." He breathed into my hair, making it impossible for me to escape since my feet were nowhere near the floor anymore. "Haven't you realized yet that you're the only woman in the world I would ever be able to see?!"

"You have to say that!" I exclaimed, though the laughter was rampant in my voice as I buried my face in the crook of Edward's neck. "You're completely stuck with me now."

"I'd say it even if I weren't." The ringing tenor in his voice didn't falter as he gently guided my head back so that our lips could meet yet again. My dead heart, were it even possible, swelled even more as I wrapped my arms tighter around Edward's neck. We'd been through so much since walking into one another's world's. It was still crazy and so surreal at times, to see just how far we'd come. It boggled my mind that love had carried us as far as it had. That invisible current that bonded two people together so absolutely had risen above so much. Nothing could squander the flames that always errupted within me whenever my husband touched or looked at me. No amount of distance or time, space, or even death could have torn us apart. After seventeen years of pain and searching, loss and bitter resentment; I was extremely grateful in that moment to have lived through it all. Every single thing thrown at me during my human existance had been to strengthen me. I'd stumbled, yes, and I was sure that there would be more times when my footing grew unstable. But because I'd been patient, believed so absolutely in a fairytale that I'd never thought could actually exist; I now had someone to help me back to my feet whenever I didn't think I could bare much more.

All the waiting had been for this moment. Now. Forever seventeen and in love with the most beautiful soul in my world. Life, existance, whatever the next phase of my journey could be called, I was so completely ready for it. Nothing could stop me. Not while I was still and continued to be Mrs. Houston Cullen.

**THE END.**

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_**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**__ And so __Waiting for Now__ has come to an end! It's not quite the ending I'd expected for this story, but I can honestly say that I'm pleased with out this crazy journey turned out. When I first began posting __Mad Season__, I was honestly terrified. I lost count of the number of times I deleted the story out of fear that no one would like it or even want to read it! But I was so happily proven wrong. Thanks so much to everyone that read and reviewed this story; your words inspired and kept me writing. And to all of those that read, but did not review; thank you as well! Seeing the numbers and everyone that favorited and story alerted this kept me writing just as much as the written reviews did. I cannot thank you guys enough for sticking with me and being genuinely curious to see where this ended up. Expect another story from me very soon!_


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